Expecting The Unexpected
by thoughtless dreamer
Summary: Ed and Envy are forced to take the phrase expect the unexpected to heart when it turns out that they are expecting, and indeed, it is quite unexpected. EnvyxEd. Yaoi and mpreg. Rated for language and for future chapters. COMPLETED.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, but I do own my mind and ideas, which you may _not_ steal, by the way. I laugh at you. Ha.

Jessie: Yaaay! I'm so happy! This is my first attempt at writing Full Metal Alchemist fanfics!

Joh: Aww, I'm so proud of my Jessie-chan **Tears**

Jessie: **Jumps up and down** And this idea was stuck in my head for_ever_…and also, I decided there aren't enough mpreg fics for my liking, especially in FMA. I find those fics awesome (either hysterically funny, or sweet, or…well, usually, they're really great)

Joh: Whee!

J twins: **Huggles**

**Warning**: This is the only time I'm saying it. This. Fic. Is. **Yaoi**. Also, I just want to take the time to say that I _know_ it is impossible for guys to get knocked up when there isn't some sort of some experiment, 'kay? I _have_ taken health class, no matter how shocking that is. And besides…**yaoi** rocks…Heh. Moving on, here's the usual warning:

_**WARNING! YAOI AHEAD! WARNING! YAOI AHEAD!**_

_**WARNING! YAOI AHEAD! WARNING! YAOI AHEAD!**_

_**WARNING! YAOI AHEAD! WARNING! YAOI AHEAD!**_

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Tired, violet eyes slowly blinked open, upon feeling an abrupt motion from the other side of the bed. He closed his eyes, a low, irritated growl sounding from his throat. Envy was _–not–_ a morning person. Hasty footsteps sounded next.

The Homunculus blinked his eyes, his vision still bleary from sleep. He could hazily make out a certain blond haired, golden-eyed chibi zipping off to their bedroom bathroom, before slamming the door behind him, before the sound of him throwing up. The noise woke Envy up somewhat, and he eased himself into a sitting position, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

He forced himself out of bed, onto his feet, and made his way to the bathroom. He opened the door, not bothering to knock; the two of them were already too used to this.

Ed was on his knees, looking quite pale and sweaty. The poor teen was shakily gripping the sides of the toilet bowl so hard his knuckles were white.

"…I would ask if you're okay, but it's obvious you're not," Envy said, obviously trying to keep a smirk off his face. Ed glowered at his green-haired lover.

"Shut the fuck up," Ed growled, moving into a position to get up before blanching, and covering his mouth. Envy's smirk faltered, and he winced, as Ed was sick again. With a soft sigh, he moved towards the blonde, and gingerly collected his hair, pulling it away from his face and his neck. He used his other hand to rub Ed's back, trying to soothe him.

Ed sat back with a small groan, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand in disgust.

"What's wrong with me?" Ed whimpered, his golden eyes turning to Envy. Envy closed his eyes, gathering what patience he had before he squatted down next to Ed.

"I don't know, Chibi," Envy replied slowly for the hundredth time, his hand lifting to push Ed's bangs out of his eyes. There was silence, and Envy took the time to study Ed's face, his fingers gently running through Ed's hair.

He looked exhausted, and Envy couldn't blame him. He was up and running to the bathroom to throw up many times during the mornings, and during the later part of the day on occasion. He was very pale most of the time, unless he was blushing (which, of course, Envy managed to achieve numerous times throughout the day). And the worst part; his mood swings.

Oh, _God,_ the mood swings. _Shudder._ Envy knew even _before_ he'd fallen for the alchemist that Ed could have rather violent mood changes, but really -- going from completely pissed off to horny (no matter how much he enjoyed it) was a _bit_ too much for the Sin to comprehend.

"Edo, as much as I hate to say it, I think you might actually have to go to the--"

"No," Ed replied smoothly. Envy continued talking as though Edward had never interrupted him

"--You've been throwing up regularly for-- how long, now?" Envy looked at Ed questioningly.

"A month," Ed replied, shrugging his shoulders lightly. Envy looked at him pointedly.

"Isn't that a bit long?" Envy asked slowly. Ed glanced at Envy blankly.

"I guess."

"So why not go--"

"Don't say it," Ed growled dangerously.

"Edo, you're going--"

"Envy…"

"To--"

"I'm warning you, don't you say it!"

"…The doctor's," Envy finished airily. Ed twitched.

"That's it. No sex for you for a week," Ed shrugged. Envy's jaw dropped.

"'O chibi, that's not _fair!"_ Envy pouted.

"The _one_ time I try to look out for your well being, and you punish me," he grumbled, not failing to notice the badly hidden smirk on Ed's face.

"I warned you," Ed sighed, slowly getting up and walking out of the bathroom, Envy on his heels.

Ed paused at the top of the stairs, and looked down. Envy propped his chin on Ed's shoulder.

"Ne, Chibi, what's wrong?" Envy asked, additionally nibbling at Ed's ear. Ed moved away, and slowly started down, steadying himself after the first step. Envy watched, his usual smirk slowly being replaced with a look of concern.

"Ed, there might be something really wrong..." Envy trailed off, watching Ed as he actually winced on the fourth step down. Ed flashed him a quick, pained smile.

"Nah, I'm fine, really, Envy," he replied, gripping the handrail.

"I just don't feel too good."

"That's the _point_, Chibi-no-baka," Envy said dryly.

Ed was on the fifth step, when he spun around quickly to glare at Envy.

"Shut up, you--" Ed cut off, blinking rapidly as black dots suddenly swarmed before his vision. He felt awfully lightheaded, and he lost his grip on the rail.

Envy saw Ed swaying slightly on the step, and started down after Ed.

The last thing Ed saw was Envy hurrying down after him, looking genuinely disturbed. He thought he could hear Envy asking repetitively if he was all right. The last things he took in before all consciousness left him right then and there, were the ground rising up to met him and Envy yelling his name. Then everything went black.

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Jessie: So whadya think so far? It_ was_ short, but it's the prologue.

Joh: **Sighs **It's so like Ed to be stubborn about going to the doctor, y'know?

Jessie: Ano, Sis… that was the point…

Joh: **Blinks and smiles** Oh yeah!

Please review if you thought it was an okay idea so far, and if I should continue. Otherwise, I'll just remove the fic, and probably be too nervous to attempt writing FMA fics again

\/\/\/\/\/\/ (Buttons were made to be pressed. Whadya waiting for?)


	2. Discovery

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, but enter witty remark here.

Jessie: Okay, so some people wanted me to continue this fic! So here's the next chapter, ya'll! I'm so happy! You guys are so nice! **Hands out cookies to reviewers**

Joh: **Eating an orange**

Jessie: I'll start replying to reviews on this chappie, cuz I actually got reviews!

Joh: **Finishes **Whee!

Jessie: **Points at Joh** Isn't she funny?

Joh: **Blushes** Aw, shux, now.

J twins: **Huggles**

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Ed slowly opened his eyes, and closed them quickly, wishing he hadn't. He tried squinting, allowing his eyes to adjust to the brightness of the room. He felt fingers softly running through his long bangs repetitively. It felt nice.

"Mmm…" he moaned softly, opening his eyes halfway and rubbing them with the back of his hand sleepily. Envy blinked, and stood up from the chair, moving to sit on the bed.

"Chibi, are you okay?" Envy asked, trying not to sound _too_ anxious. Ed slowly moved himself into a sitting position (with assistance from Envy) and looked around.

"…Why is it so damn bright?" Ed demanded weakly. Envy let out a low chuckle.

"We're in the hospital, Edo," he replied softly, his fingers gently caressing Ed's face. Ed blinked, a mix of emotions passing over his face. Shock, anger, confusion, and anxiety were all there. However, confusion overcame them all

"Why?" He asked, his golden eyes focused on the Homunculus in question.

"You passed out," Envy said. Ed's eyes widened.

"I-I did?" Slowly, he began remembering the last things he'd been able to take in. He could just barely hear Envy calling his name, he remembered feeling feverish, and falling.

"I was on the stairs…" Ed said blankly, staring ahead into space as he grasped for the memories. Envy nodded.

"That's right." Ed rubbed his face with his flesh hand.

"Did I hit my head?" he asked.

"Nah, I ran and caught you," Envy said with a smug grin. Ed paused, before pouting.

"I still hate going to the doctor's." Envy shook his head slightly.

"Why do you hate doctors so much, Edo?" Envy asked. The grumble the green-haired male received as a response was so low, he could only make out a few choice phrases, such as "stupid, ugly old men…stick friggin' needles into ya…tell you to drink _milk._" Envy

Aren't you being a bit stereotypical, Chibi?" He asked, fighting the grin off of his face. Ed's pout deepened.

"I wouldn't be complaining if you hadn't taken me…" he muttered. Envy raised an eyebrow.

"So that's the thanks I get for saving your life?" Ed paused before a slow mischievous smile spread across his face, and he sighed dramatically.

"Ne, I suppose I owe you that week of sex back, now, don't I?" Ed asked, tilting his head, and smiling coyly. Envy licked his lips, and smirked. _'_There's _the kinda thanks I'm looking for…'_

"Yeah, I suppose you do," he murmured huskily, leaning forward to kiss Ed. Just then, a man clad in a lab coat came in. Ed hurriedly pulled away, blushing madly, while Envy merely pouted, sitting back on the bed and crossing his arms in a huff. The doctor surveyed the strange scene for a moment, before curiously checking the clipboard he held. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, it was obvious that Ed was carefully observing the doctor.

The man had sandy colored hair, and green-blue eyes. He couldn't have possibly be older than 25, and right away, Envy could sense that Ed was angry (yet at the same time extremely relieved) about the doctor not being the stereotypical one he described. The doctor lifted his head once more smiling cheerfully.

"It says my patient is "Edward Elric…" So, my patient really _is_ the 'Fullmetal Alchemist,'" The doctor chuckled, looking towards the suspicious looking blonde.

"Yeah, what's it to ya?" Ed snapped, suddenly in a very irritated mood. Envy stifled an exasperated sigh. _'Thus starts the beginning of the mood swings…'_ Envy shuddered slightly.

"Well, I'm Dr. Setzar, but you can call me Brian; everyone does," Brian replied calmly, approaching the bed Ed was lying on. He studied the clipboard for a moment, before lowering it and grinning at Edward, completely ignoring Edward's glare.

"So, as Mr. Envy here has already told me… Mr. Elric, are you…okay?" Brian blinked, seeing Ed's pallor at the words "Envy" and "already told me."

"Whatever he said…I swear, it's not true," Ed answered weakly. Brian looked at him strangely for a moment, before laughing.

"Mr. Elric--"

"Could ya please just call me "Ed?" It reminds me of someone…" Ed mumbled the last bit, but Brian caught it. Knowing it wasn't the time to press the subject, he committed the strange reaction to memory.

"Right; Ed. It's important that we know if you're…_involved_ with someone," Brian said as casually as he could. If possible, Ed blushed about three times deeper. Envy just gave a lopsided smile.

"Let's see…you've been vomiting, having occasional high temperatures, complaining about aches, and your stomach bothering you," Brian read aloud. He paused, frowning at the next phrase.

"…As well as ab_normal_ mood swings_?"_ Brian asked looking up in confusion at the two. Ed sent a glare at Envy, but Envy merely looked amused at the reaction. Brian's eyes traveled down the clipboard.

"Alright. Now, I'm just going to ask you a few basic questions…but some might be just a _bit_ personal," Brian said.

"But all of your personal information will be kept confidential unless deemed dangerous for your health," Brian added hurriedly as he saw Ed open his mouth to retort. Ed bit his lip, before nodding once in assent.

"How old are you?"

"17." Brian scribbled the answer down.

"Height?"

"…"

"4"11."

"Thank you, Envy." (Scribble).

"…Fuck you," Ed muttered.

"Oh, I couldn't _possibly_ do you now," Envy replied sweetly, thus bringing back Ed's blush full force.

"_Ahem,"_ Brian coughed, fighting to maintain a straight face.

"Are you on any medication?"

"No." (Scribble). Brian flipped the front page on his clipboard, and read the next set of questions.

"Now, this is where the questions may be a little personal," Brian announced, smiling reassuringly at Ed.

"Okay…"

"How many times a week would you say you have intercourse?" Ed's jaw actually dropped open, and for a moment he was rendered speechless save a few incoherent splutters.

"You call that a _little_ personal?" Ed shouted, his face beet red. Brian shrugged helplessly.

"I didn't make the questions, and I'm not trying to embarrass you. This is just part of the examination," he explained calmly. Ed dropped his face into his hand, and mumbled something, so that his fingers muffled it.

"Pardon?" Brian asked, leaning down so that Ed could whisper in his ear. Ed repeated himself very softly and quickly, but not too fast so that Brian couldn't decipher his answer. Brian coughed loudly, and blushed slightly despite himself, standing back up straight, and copying down his answer.

"Okay," he announced.

"And have either of you had other partners before?" Brian blinked, proud that he had recovered so quickly. Ed hurriedly shook his head, and tentatively looked up at Envy. Envy slowly shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Nope. I waited for my alchemist," he grinned. Ed blushed slightly, and looked away so that neither the doctor nor Envy could see his happy smile.

"Now, I just need one more thing, Ed…" Brian started, moving to a table, and after placing the clipboard down, he started collecting a few items. Ed blinked at him, immediately looking suspicious.

"What?" Ed asked slowly. Brian smiled apologetically, lifting a hand to reveal… a small syringe.

"A blood sample." Ed sighed aggrievedly, and sat up straight, offering his left arm.

"If you must," he sighed overdramatically. Envy was lucky enough for Ed not to notice him rolling his eyes at the young blonde's actions.

Brian wiped Ed's wrist with a sanitized cotton swab before he positioned the syringe and deftly slipped the needle in, Edward barely flinching.

Brian quickly withdrew the syringe, blinking at Ed incredulously.

"You're pretty good with needles," he said, sounding slightly impressed. Ed smirked slightly.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," he scoffed. Brian shook his head slightly at the teen, and picked up his clipboard from the desk.

"I'll bring this back from the lab as soon as possible," he grinned, walking out the door. The door shut with finality behind him, and the two beings left in the room quietly watched after the door. There was silence. Ed slowly moved his eyes to Envy. Sensing he was being watched, Envy looked at Ed out of the corner of his eye.

"…Envy?"

"Hmm?"

"…" Ed merely lifted his arms. Not bothering to hide his smile, Envy got up from his chair, and slipped into the small bed with the blonde. Ed moved as close as he could to his emerald-haired lover, and wrapped his arms around his neck. Envy grinned, and took hold of Ed's chin, tilting his head upward and closing the gap between their lips. Ed's eyes slid closed, as did Envy's.

One of Envy's hands subconsciously moved to the back of Edward's head, crushing their lips together hotly. Envy licked at Ed's lips, and was immediately granted entry. Ed shuddered as Envy's tongue explored his mouth professionally.

When Envy remembered his blonde needed to breathe, he broke apart, grinning broadly seeing his chibi panting heavily, slightly breathless himself from the kiss.

Ed leaned against the Homunculus, and tilted his head back so that it rested in the crook of Envy's neck. Envy kissed the top of Ed's head, sighing contentedly. He listened to a long yawn from Ed, and how his breathing eventually became even. He cautiously moved beneath Ed until he got comfortable, and relaxed, letting Ed's body fit into his. It felt so right, the perfect fit of Ed's small frame against his. He slowly let his eyes close.

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Violet eyes quickly opened at the sound of muffled voices. Upon listening more intently, he realized it sounded as though people were arguing about something in hushed whispers outside the door to the room he and a sleeping Edward were in. Even straining to listen, he couldn't hear what the voices were saying. Finally, he saw the doorknob turn, and a very serious Brian strode quickly into the room, closing the door behind him. He slowly turned to face Envy, who was watching him with mild interest, and sighed, raking his fingers through his hair as he made his way over to the bed.

"Mmm? Whasgoin' on?" Ed mumbled sleepily as he woke to the sound of footsteps stopping close to him. He sat up rapidly when he saw that it was Brian, all traces of drowsiness gone.

"Did you find out what's going on? Envy asked. Brian ignored Envy completely, and looked at Ed seriously.

"Ed, how long have these symptoms been going on?" He asked in a rush. Ed frowned slightly.

"I've been throwing up every morning for the past month, but been having stomach pains for longer than that…I've just been feeling very off for a while now," he shrugged. Brian bit his cheek, and scanned over his clipboard. Ed, only just realizing Brian didn't ask his question glared at the doctor immersed in his notes.

"…Well, did you find out what the hell is wrong with me?" He asked impatiently. A faint smile made its way onto Brian lips, and he sighed –seemingly in resignation– putting his hands on his hips and staring at Edward in amusement.

"You alchemist's never cease to amaze me," he chuckled. Ed glowered.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ed demanded. Envy raised an eyebrow.

"Actually, yeah, what _is_ that supposed to mean?" Envy joined in.

"Have you done any alchemy recently?" Brian asked.

"No, I haven't used any since I started feeling ill?"

"How long ago was the last alchemy you did?"

"Two or three months ago…" Envy could feel Ed tensing as Brian seemed to be relating his illness to alchemy.

"Okay, and have you done any experimental alchemy recently, or been in any tests? Any at all?" Brian asked expectantly. Ed was about to shake his head, but froze.

"Wait…a little bit before I started feeling…weird…I was doing an alchemic experiment," Ed started. Brian looked interested.

"What was it based upon?" Ed frowned, not really seeing much use in asking about his work.

"On creating life…like Human Transmutation without bringing back Homunculus as a result of failure."

"Was it a success?"

"No, it was a failure…Doc, why are you asking me about alchemy? This has _nothing_ to do with trying to figure out what's wrong with me!" Ed exclaimed, beginning to sound exasperated. Brian suddenly looked serious.

"It had absolutely _everything_ to do with what's going on with you, Ed," Brian replied quietly.

Violet eyes suddenly widened. Brian caught this from the corner of his eye, and smiled at the Homunculus.

"It seems your boyfriend has figured it out before you, Ed. He must know your body better than _you_ do," Brian teased playfully, bringing a blush forth from the blonde.

"…You're not _serious_, right? You're not implying what I think you are?" Envy said slowly. Ed turned his head to gape at Envy, before turning back to the doctor incredulously.

"What are you _talking_ about?" he growled. Brian grinned at Envy's disbelief.

"I kept repeating the test, but it always came up the same; it's in his blood," he directed at Envy, before turning his attention to Ed.

"It's a good thing you're sitting down, or else I'd ask you to sit for this," Brian said softly, reaching a hand forward and griping Ed's shoulder, staring him straight in the eye.

"Ed, you're experiment was a success," he announced as calmly as he could. There was silence. Ed blinked, before all color drained from his face.

"Y-you mean t-to say--" Brian smiled cheerfully.

"Congratulations, Edward and Envy. You're three months pregnant."

The Fullmetal Alchemist, who had attempted a Human Transmutation and survived, who had braved two automail operations at the same time, and who had managed to decipher the history to the Philosopher's Stone…

…Promptly fainted for the second time that day.

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Ed: **Reads** Aw, c'mon! Why am _I _the one getting knocked up?

Envy: **Glomps Ed** Because _I_ get knocked up in the majority of the EnvyxEd fics. Hey, someone's gotta be original.

Jessie: **Beams** Thank you, Envy! Besides, Ed, you –_are_– the uke of the relationship.

Joh: **Nods** Yeah…

Envy _**Cough**For-_oh-_so-obvious-reasons**Cough**_

Ed: **Blushes**

dream-whizper: Oooh, FMA is –_so–_ good! It is really sad at some points, but also _really_ funny! It's really good if you let yourself get into it! **Starry-eyed** Thanks for the compliments; keep 'em coming! (Lol, jk)

xXxchiixXx: Yup, I'm starting to write FMA! Go me! (Lol) And of course I'll have to keep an eye out for _yours!_

MiStraLL That's really important for me to hear; thanks a lot!

Kaoru Gal: Hahahaha, I love you, Sis! Glad ya like it so far! **Kisses**

Me And My God Complex: 1.) _Love_ your username! 2.) Mpregs _do_ rock! Glad you think it's good so far…hope you liked _this_ chappie!

razatip: There's gotta be _some _relief for Envy! Poor guy, always the one to get knocked up cuz he's more girly or something! Ed's gotta do some of the work, too! Glad you think it's well written!

Firelover666: Of _course_ I'm weird, that's why you love me! **Huggles** Fluffaluffagus!

Sadistic Sycho: Hope this update was soon enough for you! Lol (No, seriously…)

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: (I laughed so hard when I deciphered your username!) N'ways, totally relieved you thought it was a good idea! Seriously…Envy can't do _all_ the work!

Kakashisninjadogs: **Pouts** Aww, but the big red buttons are the most _fun_ to push! (Lol, jk) BTW, I dedicate _all_ the yaoi alerts to my dear friend who is an anti-yaoist, and tells me to make big alerts…so yeah. I'm sick of them, but respecting my buddy's wishes. **Shrugs** Aw, well.

(Please review, because if I get reviews, I know I'm probably doing a good job, so the faster I'll try to update to please you all! Cookies and love to all you nice readers who reviewed the prologue! Be sure to review again! Ta ta for now!)


	3. Acceptance

Disclaimer: Still don't own it…**Goes back to diabolical plans**

Jessie: So this fic actually got 21 reviews after two chapters! Wow!

Joh: Yaaay! **Goes back to listening to music**

Jessie: Oh, yes. Remember when I warned that the fic was rated for future chapters? Well, this chapter contains a **yaoi** lemon.

Joh: **Sniggers** Wow, that was fast.

Jessie: **Smirks** Well, it ­_–is–_ me who's writing this, Sis.

J twins: **Laughing**

Jessie: So if you don't wanna read the lemon…don't read past the **XoX** marks, 'kay?

Joh: Ne…who _wouldn't_ read the lemon?

Jessie: I…don't…know.

J twins: **Laughing harder**

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The last, dim rays of the sun managed to get through the windows, casting a warm, orangey-pink glow across the room, giving the more or less white room a more comfortable feel. The birds somewhere out in the growing darkness sang softly, and a slight warm breeze came through the open window. But the conscious one of the two people in the room noticed none of these things.

Violet eyes were set unseeingly on the sleeping teen's face, trying to grasp the concept of being able to be something he never dreamt of, because he'd believed it impossible. He couldn't seem to comprehend it himself, but not for the same reasons, of course.

'Me_? A _father?_ I can't see myself being one…'_ Envy thought. Right now, he could _clearly _remember the night Ed came home from Eastern Command, deeply upset with himself for the "failure" of the experiment. According to Brian, that would have been the night mostly likely for the conception to have taken place…

**Flashback**

Envy looked up from the book he was reading at the sound of a violent _slam_ from downstairs. Stomping footsteps followed, and, with a stifled sigh, he placed his book on the bedside table as he waited patiently for his obviously angry blonde to emerge in the doorway. Sure enough, Ed came trudging through the door, glaring murderously at Envy's smirking figure.

"…Bad day at work, _love_?" Envy teased. Ed growled angrily, and slammed the door before he stalked over to Envy, slumping down to sit by him on the bed.

"You don't know the half of it," he deadpanned, letting his head fall into his hands.

For the past few weeks, Ed had been diligently trying to create a more successful type of Human Transmutation. He'd been up countless nights reading far more advanced alchemy books and spent hours on end attempting to decipher other alchemists' notes who had studied Human Transmutation. After the researching section was over, he went to work making drafts of an experiment. Today was his chance to put it to work at the H.Q. And obviously, it hadn't gone the way he wanted.

**XoX**

Envy scooted closer to the dejected alchemist, and wrapped his arms around his waist. Ed peeked out at Envy through his fingers from the corner of his eye.

"Envy, I'm _–really–_ not in the mood," Ed tried to say as civilly as he possibly could, mustering all the calmness he had left over and putting it into his words. Envy slowly licked behind Ed's ear, smirking to himself when he felt a very slight shiver run down Ed's spine. Envy brought his hands up and kneaded Ed's shoulders.

"_Relax_, Chibi. Let _me_ take care of you from here on," he whispered into Ed's ear, pressing his lips against Ed's neck and moving his lips down, nipping occasionally. Reluctantly, Ed relaxed into Envy and closed his eyes, trying to forget about his day at work.

Sensing that Ed was willing to take it further, Envy turned Ed around and made him face him before he stripped Ed's shirt off, tossing it carelessly somewhere else in the room and turning his focus back to Edward's neck. Envy picked an easily viewable spot on Ed's neck, and went to work sucking, licking, and kissing like there was no tomorrow.

Ed let himself sprawl out beneath Envy, and sink back against the pillows. Ed gasped when Envy bit down suddenly. The Homunculus immediately placed apologetic kisses down his neck until his reached Ed's chest, running his tongue down the center until he reached his navel, quickly dipping his tongue in and back out, earning a pleasured shudder from the small blonde.

Envy grinned when he realized he'd accomplished step one in his mission; get Ed to loosen up completely. Step two: seduce him. And if he were able to pull off step two, he'd hopefully get to step three: get laid.

Envy captured Ed's lips in a heated kiss, and forced his tongue between the teen's lips. Ed kissed back with equal passion, determined not to let Envy overcome him so easily.

His eyes snapped open and he exclaimed into Envy's mouth when he felt Envy's fingers wrap around his length. He'd been so preoccupied in kissing back; he hadn't noticed Envy's hand working its way into his pants. Envy moved his hand slowly, gradually making his movements more frequent. So when Envy saw Ed's eyes close, and heard his koi whimpering his name, he was assured that he'd succeeded in step two.

Envy removed his hand, and swiftly pulled Ed's pants and underwear off, grinning to himself when Ed hastily assisted in removing his. Envy paused to yank his gloves off with his teeth, before hooking Ed's legs over his shoulders and seize his hips, pausing to let Ed grab his shoulders

"You ready, Fullmetal?" Envy growled, entering Ed roughly without any further notice. Ed cried out loudly, gripping Envy's shoulders tightly.

Ed bit his lip to restrain from crying out in pain again as Envy impatiently slammed into him again. Though as Envy's rhythm quickly grew faster, Ed could slowly feel the pain ebbing away, being replaced with pleasure.

"E-Envy!" Ed gasped as Envy lifted him while thrusting, brushing against something that sent jolts of pleasure up his spine. Envy shifted quickly before slamming into his lover again, hitting the spot directly, and wrenching a wanton yell from Ed.

Envy felt Ed finally thrusting his hips along with the rhythm he kept, and groaned as the impact increased, moving a hand from Ed's side to his member, and pumped it along with their rhythm. He slammed into the same spot again, until Ed released with a particularly loud moan. When he tensed, he sent Envy right over the edge along with him.

Envy pulled out from Ed, and unhooked his legs, slumping on top of the blonde. Ed grumbled beneath him, and he chuckled, sliding off of his lover and shifting onto his side so that he could wrap his arms protectively around the much-calmer blonde. Edward pressed his face into Envy's chest, breathing his sent in. Envy kissed the top of Ed's head lightly.

"See? Today wasn't all that bad, now, was it?" He asked with a small, smug smirk. Ed merely replied his muffled response, cuddling up even closer to his partner. His breaths evened in sleep, and Envy joined him not too long after, but not before he was able to think: _'Mission accomplished.'_

**XoX**

**End Flashback.**

(A/N: It's safe now)

Envy was shaken from his deep reverie due to a quiet question from a certain blonde…

"Envy…why is your hand on my stomach?" Ed asked, looking slightly confused. Envy looked down, and sure enough, while he'd been thinking, his hand had traveled down, and was now resting on Edward's (currently) flat stomach. His fingers were even tracing small patterns on their own.

Edward continued looking around the room, taking it all in. He chuckled softly, and looked at Envy, amusement in his eyes.

"Envy, I had the –strangest- dream…you'll _never_ guess what it was about!" Ed laughed.

"Lemme guess: a crazy doctor came in and announced you were pregnant," Envy said bluntly. Ed paled, and swallowed hard.

"…I was sort of hoping wouldn't say that," he whispered weakly. All of his muscles suddenly went slack, and he slumped forward, his eyes covered by his bangs. Envy frowned, and wrapped his arms around the distraught blonde. Envy opened his mouth to reply before quickly closing it, realizing that he had absolutely no idea of what to say to his chibi.

Ed's eyes were lowered unseeingly at the covers. Envy could tell that thoughts were racing through his head, and he was trying to piece together logical answers one by one.

"…Envy?" Ed asked, almost inaudibly.

"Hmm?" Envy made a soft noise in his throat to show he was listening. Ed slowly lifted his head up to look at Envy. The Homunculus was shocked to see two thin trails of tears slowly trickling down Ed's cheeks.

"Envy, how're we going to do this?" Ed whimpered, not bothering to wipe away his tears, because more just kept coming. Envy's expression softened, and he was quiet for a moment, thinking of an answer. Ed gazed at his lover, waiting for an impending answer.

Finally, Envy cupped Ed's cheek with his hand, wiping his tears away with his thumb. Ed's golden eyes blinked in confusion. He knew as well as anyone that it was strange for Envy to show any bit of comforting behavior.

"I honestly don't know, Chibi, but it'll be okay," Envy replied. Ed looked like he was holding back from sobbing, and Envy slipped his arms around his small blonde. Envy felt shudders racking through Ed's back as he sobbed silently into his shoulder. Envy looked slightly nervous; he was used to Ed being chronically angry, _not_ emotional. Envy gulped slightly, before he awkwardly rubbed Ed's back. A weak laugh cut through Ed's sobs, and he pulled back, wiping his eyes.

"I-I hate being s-so fucking emotional," he groaned, his mood returning to normal. Envy smirked.

"Aw, is "Mommy" getting hormonal?" Envy grinned. Envy blushed deeply.

"Shut the fuck up!" He yelled, pulling a pillow out from behind them and smacking Envy in the side of the head. Envy grinned evilly.

"Oh, you asked for it, Alchemist," he chuckled, struggling to get the pillow from Ed's _right _hand. With strength only the Homunculus could muster, he managed to rip it from a very surprised Ed's grip. Envy pinned the blonde under himself, and smirked down at Ed. He slipped his hand beneath Ed's shirt, causing Ed to shiver due to the sudden cool contact against his warm skin. Envy traced feather light strokes on Ed's abdomen.

"Mm, this won't stay flat for long," Envy murmured, quickly leaning down to press his lips against Ed's before the chibi could retort angrily. Ed melted into the kiss, and let Envy slip his tongue between his lips. Envy pulled away after a few more moments, licking his lip in a satiated manner.

Envy moved so that he had Ed resting up against him for support. Ed rested his head against Envy's shoulder, absentmindedly toying with a loose strand of Envy's long, emerald-green hair. Envy's hand was still under Ed's shirt, now tracing small circles.

"Envy--" Ed started, but broke off abruptly.

"What?" Envy asked, continuing to stroke Ed's stomach softly. Ed took a deep breath.

"Do you…do you hate me?" Ed asked timidly. Envy's mouth fell open slightly.

"Of course not, Edo. Why would I hate you?" Envy replied quickly after his initial pause. Ed looked down.

"Because…it's not natural…" Ed trailed off. Envy rolled his eyes.

"Edo, _I'm_ the most unnatural thing here, okay?" Edward made a quiet noise in response, resting his cheek against Envy's shoulder. Envy could sense Ed's mood dropping quickly. Envy frowned, once again attempting to think of something to say to comfort Ed. Before he could say anything, Ed started talking again.

"How am I going to be able to go to work?" Ed asked softly. Envy shrugged.

"Tell them the truth," Envy said simply. Ed glowered at him.

"Oh, so to _you_ it's no big deal if everyone knows the Fullmetal Alchemist is knocked up?" Ed growled. Envy braised an eyebrow.

"…Yeah, I guess so," Envy replied slowly. _Smack_.

"Itai! What was _that_ for?" Envy yelled, rubbing his head where Ed had punched him with his metal arm.

"For being a fucking asshole," Ed replied plainly, crossing his arms.

"Wow, Edo, that's sure as hell a mature reason," Envy said, rolling his eyes at his blonde.

"Shut the fuck up," Ed growled, lifting his right arm in an intimidating manner. Envy clenched his fingers into a tight fist, and forced himself to remain calm.

"…Look, Edo, I don't wanna fight, okay?" Ed's scowl vanished, and was replaced with a tired expression.

"Yeah, you're right," he mumbled, examining his automail arm in boredom.

A pause.

"Hey, Envy, when can we get outta here?"

"I guess…whenever you check out, right?" Ed brightened up immediately.

"Really? Then let's get out of here now!" he exclaimed, pulling back the covers of the bed, and cautiously turning to the side to gingerly place his feet on the floor. Envy hopped out on the other side, and came around to Ed, ready to support him if necessary. Ed quickly gained his balance himself, and, picking up his red coat slung across a chair on the way out, strode towards the door, opening it and leading the way out of the room.

XxXxXxXxXx

Ed sighed in relief upon reaching the safely of their home. After quickly hanging up his coat and kicking off his shoes, the alchemist made his way into the living room, happily falling onto the coach with a groan.

"Damnit," he muttered, luxuriously stretching out on the couch, Envy joining him almost immediately after he'd made himself comfortable.

"What?" Envy asked, closing his eyes, and lazily putting his arms behind his head, using them as a pillow.

"It's just…after I started a relationship with you…" Ed murmured, resting his chin on his hand, staring into space thoughtfully. Envy peeked an eye open in mild interest.

"Yeah?" Envy urged, sensing Ed's hesitation. Ed frowned.

"…I sorta gave up on ever having kids. I never imagined having any with you, _especially_ not literally" Ed laughed. At this point, both of Envy's eyes were open, and focused on Ed. Ed grinned childishly.

"Well, I'm sorta…happy I get the chance to be a dad-"

"_Mom,"_ Envy corrected with a smirk. Ed glared.

"…_Parent_." Ed finished, staring at Envy as if challenging him to correct him again. Envy's smirk broadened.

"I didn't say anything," he replied "innocently." Ed rolled his eyes, but smiled despite himself.

"I know that adoption is always an alternative way to have kids, but I just…one of the biggest reasons I couldn't imagine raising kids with you was because…I never could imagine you with kids, and, well, are you even okay with having a baby?" Ed blurted out the last bit. Envy immediately knew by the way Ed said it that the chibi had been holding back from asking for quite a while.

Instead of instantaneously answering without thought as he usually did, Envy took the time to think before he spoke, letting Ed know that he was taking the situation as seriously as he was.

"Edo, this is as surprising and new to me as it is to you. It's hard for me to envision me with kids _myself._ I also never thought I'd ever have the opportunity, being a Homunculus and all," Envy replied, sighing softly.

"It's gotta be the most human thing any of us has done," he added quietly. Ed smiled, obviously relived.

"Well, even though I'm still terrified of the prospect of having a baby," Ed broke off, paling slightly before continuing.

"I can't imagine anyone else I'd rather have a kid with," Ed finished, the color in his face coming back with a soft blush. His words caused Envy to break into a broad grin.

"…Damn, I love you, Edo," Envy declared, snaking an arm around Ed's waist and pulling him closer. He easily pulled the blonde onto his lap, sucking the back of Ed's neck seductively. Ed shivered in response, letting himself fall back into Envy. Envy traced his tongue down Ed's neck, and lifted his hands to slip Ed's top off, running his lips against the smooth skin. Ed let himself get lost in Envy's teasing ministrations, sighing in contentment when Envy did something that felt particularly good.

Eventually, the two ended up lying together on the couch, resting in a comfortable silence. Envy pressed himself further back against the couch, letting Ed nestle up even closer against his front. He slipped his arms possessively around the blonde's abdomen, and closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

A sudden gasp from Ed brought Envy back to reality, and he tilted his head to the side so that he could see Ed's face.

"What's wrong?" Envy asked, seeing that Ed's eyes were wide, and his face was nearly white. Ed slowly turned his head to look at Envy, licking his lips nervously before he could speak.

"Damnit, Envy, what am I gonna tell Al?"

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**  
**Jessie: **Dun dun duuuun. **Uh-oh! How's Ed's little brother gonna react to the news?

Joh: Wait, does Al even know that Ed and Envy are together?

Jessie: **Smiles evilly** Maaaybe, maaaybe not!

Joh: **Tears** B-but I wanna knoooow!

Jessie: **Huggles** Don't worry, you'll find out next chappie, Sis!

Joh: **Sighs** Okay, Nee-san…

dream-whizper: Y-you really think I'm that good? You're sooo nice! Thank you so much! You don't know how much that means to me! I hope you continue enjoying my writing…I really, _really_ hope you enjoyed this chappie…I tried my best! I'll message you ASAP with an alternative e-mail, 'kay? Huggles!

aruslym: **Laughs** Of course Edo should feel successful, even if his experiment sorta kinda didn't work out the way he thought it would! Heh, heh, heh…Yeah, Envy's gonna have to go through hell, isn't he? **Sniggers**

Kaoru Gal: Loved your _huge_ review, makes me laugh whenever I read it, babe! **Re-reads and laughs hysterically** Love you, Sis! You rock!

Me And My God Complex: Glad you're enjoying it! I'm updating, see? I'm a good person…right?

razatip: **Breathes out in relief** Good, I hoped that explanation would satisfy people! **Bows** Thank you, thank you. Oh yeah…do you think the seme and uke are changed now? I hope so… Anyways, hope you liked the chapter!

HolyMistress: Hahaha! But I love your sick mind (Jk) Glad you liked the ending, I thought it was pretty funny, too! That's why I wrote it of course, and if you enjoyed it, it was a success! Whoot!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Waves flag with you** Ditto! Yeah EnvyxEd mpregs! Rock on!

shu-chan77901: Glad you like it so far! You'll find out as you keep on reading if they keep it or not. All in good time.

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: I'm happy you enjoyed the chappie. Hope this one was good as well! **Nods** Here's Envy's well-deserved break! **Giggles**

Caim soul eater: Yay! Thanks so much! Hope you continue to like it!

Kakashisninjadogs: Yup! Edo's gonna be a mommy, and Envy's gonna be a daddy! Ah, I pity Envy though…the things he's gonna have to go through…**Snickers**

(Please review, because I need to make sure everyone's enjoying the fic! Ice cream and double chocolate chip cookies to you awesome reviewers. I'm glad to hear you're enjoying it so much so far! Thanks for the support, and keep reviewing! Toodles!)


	4. Family News

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist; isn't that right Sis?

Joh: Shaw.

Jessie: Which sucks.

Joh: Shaw.

Jessie: …Aishiteru!

Joh: …Wo ai ni!

J twins: **Huggles and kisses**

Jessie: Oh yes. In response to some reviewers' questions, Al has his body back. Um, please…don't ask me why Al has his body back and Ed doesn't have his arm and leg back…I…_really_ like Ed's automail, and I think its awesome. **Sweatdrops** Shut up, it's awesome, and you know it! C'mon, admit it!

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"Envy, I told you already, _I'm_ getting in the shower. _First._ _You_ will go _after_ me," Ed repeated slowly, emphasizing a few choice words. Envy's arms were crossed in a stubborn manner.

"I don't see why we have to go separately," he grumbled.

"Because I won't have my innocent baby brother walking in on me –being _raped_– in the shower," Ed replied fluidly. His response brought a smirk to Envy's lips.

"But Edo," Envy purred, slinking his arms around Ed's waist and rubbing up against him. He grinned to himself, hearing a small gasp escape Ed's lips.

"It'll save time _and _water; we'll be in and out in no time. Al's gonna be here at…what time?" Envy licked Ed's ear.

"…Ten thirty," Ed said, his voice tiny.

"And what time is it?"

"…T-ten," Ed whimpered as Envy's hand slowly slid down his chest. Envy kissed the nape of his neck.

"C'mon, Fullmetal, it'll be faster that way," Envy pushed. Ed bit his lip, obviously having an internal struggle; being torn between having a less lonely shower, or keeping his brother's mind innocent.

"Get _in_ here!" He suddenly snapped, grabbing Envy's wrist and dashing into the bathroom. Envy smirked triumphantly, and waited patiently as Ed turned on the water, adjusting it to a comfortable temperature.

As soon as he decided he liked the temperature, Ed pulled Envy into the shower, grabbing the Homunculus's shoulders and pulling him into a heated kiss. Envy's eyes widened in surprise; usually _he_ was the one to initiate these kinds of activities. But of course, he wasn't complaining. Envy's hands went to the back of Ed's head, and he entwined his fingers in the blonde hair, pulling his head even closer.

Ed broke away all too soon for Envy's liking, and looked around, searching for the soap. Envy sighed overdramatically, and leaned back against the wall, closing his eyes. They reopened when he felt slippery hands trailing down his chest. Violet met gold, and Ed smiled suggestively, making his movements even slower. Envy grinned, and grabbed Ed's wrists, yanking his arms high over his head and pinning him against the wall, away from the direct spray of water.

"E-Envy--" Ed's exclaimed, though his lover's lips muffled his cry. Envy's arm snaked around Ed's waist, and gently traced up and down his back. Finally, Envy felt Ed relax into his embrace in resignation, and he didn't hesitate to pull the blonde closer up against him. His hand slowly started moving lower from Ed's waist. He was shocked when he felt a hand move over his own, stopping it from going any further. His eyes lifted to Ed's questioningly, and the blonde looked back remorsefully at him.

"Envy, I'm serious, we have to get moving," Ed said quietly. There was a pause, and Envy looked at him, his expression clearly reading: "Are-you-fucking-kidding-me?" Envy surprised Ed greatly by slowly releasing his grip on him, and picking up the soap, quickly rubbing it along his body, washing himself. The two finished their shower in silence.

XxXxXxXxXx

"Ohayo, Onii-chan!" Al greeted cheerfully, pulling his smaller brother into a tight hug.

"Hey, Al," Ed replied, smiling at him broadly. Although he was _terrified_ at the prospect of telling Al the "news" he had for him, he was delighted to see his little brother.

And it wasn't as if they got to see each other everyday. After the brothers had successfully recovered Alphone's body, the younger Elric eagerly settled down in Risembool to a much quieter life than the one they used to have.

As Ed and Al had a closer relationship than most siblings had, as they were the last family they had of each other. So naturally, they told each other _everything_, and promised never to keep secrets from each other.

Although, at first, Al wasn't too pleased to find out from Edward that he had gotten himself a lover, and had conveniently been "too busy with work" to find the time to tell him about it (three months); although his brother was gay, although his brother's lover was a Homunculus – and the very same one who they had been fighting during their search for the Philosopher's Stone – he didn't think of his brother any differently, or love him any less.

"How have you been? I haven't heard from you in a while," Al exclaimed. Ed laughed nervously.

"Yeah, it _has_ been a while, hasn't it?" Al nodded enthusiastically.

"Uh-huh; over three months!" Al's focus went from Edward to the stairs.

"Hello, Envy," Al said, bowing politely. Envy looked slightly taken aback to be greeted so politely, but returned the greeting with a "hey," and a lopsided grin, jumping the last two steps before swaggering over to them.

"Would you like anything to eat? Drink?" Ed asked, already making his way towards the kitchen.

"I would like some tea if it isn't too much trouble," Al said hesitantly. Ed chuckled to himself over Al's incredible politeness. He pondered over how they'd ended up with such different personalities as he busied himself with boiling the water. A few minutes later, all three were in the living room with tea.

"So, Ed, what did you want to tell me? You would only tell me over the phone that you had some unexpected news!" Al blurted out. Ed bit his lip; he'd kind of been hoping that this would come later…

"Is it the good kind of news?"

"Well, it's the kind where it depends on the perspective you choose to take on the matter--"

"--Whadya think about kids?" Envy cut in. Ed spared a heated glare towards Envy, before hesitantly looking at Al. Al blinked in surprise, the answer obviously unanticipated.

"Well…I personally love kids, but…are you getting at what I think you are?" Al asked his voice getting more excited no matter how hard he tried not to let it. Ed laughed mirthlessly to himself.

"For some reason, I doubt it…" he muttered under his breath.

"You're adopting a kid, aren't you?" Al cried out happily. Ed and Envy stared at Al's beaming face and sweatdropped.

"Aha…s-something like that," Ed grinned, feeling extremely relived; at least Al was excited at the prospect of being an uncle…

Al tilted his head to the side in confusion, raising an eyebrow questioningly.

"Well, I don't see any other way going about have a kid; its not like you can get _pregnant_," Al giggled.

Silence.

Al stopped laughing when he saw Envy and Ed exchange apprehensive glances. Al's mouth opened slightly, and he slowly lifted a hand to cover it, his eyes widening.

"…You have _–got–_ to be kidding me," he said weakly. Envy smirked smugly and slipped an arm around a deeply blushing chibi. Al eyes went from Envy, to Ed, to Envy, and back to Ed. A knowing smile slowly spread across Al's face.

"…Onii-chan, _you're _the one who's pregnant, aren't you?" Al asked softly. Envy nodded numbly, his gaze fixated on his automail hand. He was shocked to be pulled into a tight embrace, and he lifted his gaze to Al's smiling face.

"Do you know what this means? I'm gonna be an _uncle!"_ Al exclaimed, hugging Ed even more tightly, the blonde blinking dumbly.

"You mean…you're not…mad?" Ed asked meekly. Al pulled Ed back by his shoulder, staring at him.

"Are you crazy? Why would I be mad?" Al asked, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl? How far along are you? Do you have any ideas for names? How many--"

"--Whoa! Calm down, Al, I think Ed's gone into shock," Envy chuckled, stopping the bombarding questions coming from the younger Elric. He rubbed Ed's back soothingly, as the alchemist continued to try and absorb the fact that Al wasn't upset with him.

"Wait, wait, wait," Al said quickly, his confusion finally catching up with his excitement.

"How the heck did Edward wind up pregnant, anyway? How is that possible?" Ed looked towards Envy expectantly. Envy sighed dramatically, but smiled.

"Allowthe _–father–_ to explain…"

XxXxXxXxXx

"Okay, okay, I'm just making sure _one last time_. You have _­–no– _problem with this whatsoever?" Ed asked slowly.

"Nope!" Al repeated for the eighteenth time, still sounding cheerful. Ed noticed Envy gradually moving closer towards him, smiling way too brightly not to be plotting something that had a 99.9 chance to do with him.

"Ne, Edo," Envy whispered into Ed's ear when he was near enough, and Al wasn't paying any attention to them as he was too busy giving them some advice for raising children that he'd gathered over time. He didn't seem to notice that the two weren't listening to him

"What?" Ed replied quietly, warily watching his brother to make sure he wasn't listening.

"You owe me from the shower," he smirked. Ed paled.

"Envy, not while _Al's_ here!" Ed whispered harshly. Heedless to his pleading, Ed felt Envy's hand creeping into his lap under the table, well out of Al's view. A small moan managed to escape his throat, and Al looked up at the noise.

"Onii-chan, are you okay?" Al asked, his eyes concerned. Ed forced a bright smile onto his face, and nodded hastily.

"N-never better!" He gasped, Envy's fingers skillfully slipping under the material of his pants and underwear, barely brushing against him. Al looked at him suspiciously.

"…Alright," he said slowly, before getting up to bring his cup into the kitchen. As soon as he was out of sight, Envy pulled his hand out of Ed's pants and lifted the blonde onto his lap, wrapping an arm around his waist and ignoring Ed's desperate pleas for him to stop. The Homunculus turned Ed's head toward him with his thumb and index finger, stopping all coherent vocal noises from the blonde completely.

"When you're done molesting my brother…" Al started dryly, his comment breaking in from nowhere. Envy broke away from Ed and turned his head towards the other Elric in surprise. Al was casually leaning against the doorframe to the kitchen, a smug expression on his face due to having been able to catch the two in the act. Ed blushed deeply, and Al laughed, walking over towards them and looking at his onii-chan fondly.

"I hate to say it, but I've got to be getting back to the train station; it's two fifty, my train leaves at three forty five, and the next train heading back to Risembool isn't until tomorrow," Al sighed sadly. Ed pushed Envy's arm that was trapping him off, and got up to bid his brother goodbye properly. Ed looked up into Al's face proudly. He lifted a hand to ruffle his hair, although he was taller than him.

"I'm gonna miss you, Al," Ed grinned. Al smiled back.

"Yeah, me too. I'm going to come back and visit as much as possible, okay, Onii-chan?" Al said. Ed nodded approvingly.

"I should hope you would. Oh, and would ya tell Aunt Pinako and Winry the news for me?" Al nodded quickly.

"Of course!" When Ed and Al reached the door, Al bent down to give Ed one last hug before he departed. When he stepped outside, he turned to smile at Ed.

"You and Envy are going to be great parents, Onii-chan," Al nodded. Ed smiled happily in response. Al's smile turned into a small smirk.

"And _you're_ going make a great…well, technically it's "Mom," is it not?"

_Slam._

And that's when the younger Elric had the front door slammed in his face as an angry blonde chibi's response.

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Jessie: Hahaha! So Al's certainly excited to be an uncle.

Joh: **Sighs in relief** Good thing he isn't angry. That wouldn't have been good…

Jessie: **Nods** Yeah. So I hope you enjoyed this chapter, everyone! Look forward to the future updates. They contain mood swings, self-consciousness, and "signs of the apocalypse." Arigato to all those who reviewed! You get flowers and chocolates if you reviewed! Please continue to do so. Reviews keep me going!

Tisska01: Glad you think its good! **Dances happily**

Kakashisninjadogs: I'm gonna take cover, too! **Hides under bed with laptop** These two do have a pretty funny relationship! Ah, I just love EnvyxEd! **Nods **I think Al's a very understanding person, so duh…he's okay with it. Wait till Winry responds to the news, and _Roy!_ **Snickers evilly** Roy's gonna be happy for the teasing opportunity, ne?

Firehedgehog: **Tries to laugh evilly but fails miserably** Yeah, I'm _definitely _continuing this fic! I'm glad it's getting so popular!

Ally Inu: **Worried** Is the fluff okay? I hope so… And I hope you liked Al's reaction!

Sashimi Mamimi: I'm trying to have Envy be less in Ed's face now, cuz he's trying to let Ed get used to the idea of having a baby, but yeah…once he's decided Ed's had enough time to get it through his head…** Smirk** Gotta read on to find out, ne? **Jumps around **I have 10 points! …Can I buy a stuffed kitty from the fair with that? Definitely update when you feel you're confident enough. **Grins sheepishly** It was kinda scary to submit it, but I thought there weren't enough, and I could do an okay job! Glad you think its good!

Trigger Happy Psychopath: 1.) I looove your account name! 2.) I'm soooo happy you think it's so good!

Forever Yours Zana: **Laughing hysterically** I think the combo will make a cute kit as well! Envy's gonna be a daddy, and Ed's gonna be a mommy! Ah, the mommy comment reaction from Ed is fun to write!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Smiles** Indeed, I shall continue **Hands you a cookie** Thanks for your support!

Kaoru Gal: **Kisses** Sis, I love you so much! **Wide eyed** You left a

–_huge–_ review! And I loved reading it! It was funny! **Huggles** I luv you soooo much!

Me And My God Complex: Oh, my God, I was practically dying with laughter after I read your review! Then I went around telling people who would listen, like Joh-chan! She laughed a lot! How'd you like this chapter?

HolyMistress: **Smirks** Ah, you and your filthy, filthy mind (jk!). So I hope this was a satisfactory update, and you enjoyed it! I'm sorry if you consider it my fault that you never want kids **Sobs** N'way, cookies for you! **Hands cookies** Be happy! Oh, and you made me laugh hysterically when I read the part in the review you left about the Halloween thing. You're giving me ideas… Hahaha! Please continue to review! You're awesome!

Light-Hideko: I agree! Ed's totally "Aww" when he's emotional. And Excited + Al XD (Is this equation right, as well?) Hope you liked this chapter! Glad you seem to be enjoying the fic so far!

dream-whizper: **Laughs and nods** What a combination for parents, ne? So, you were right! Totally overly happy! Rrraaa! I wanna see the movie too! I'm glad you'll keep reading. And yes, its better to have reviews sooner than later! Heh, heh, heh…and know, I'm awful, right? S'aank you for da review!

(Thanks for all your support, reviewers! Please review, and tell me your thoughts. I hope you're all enjoying the fic so far, and continue to! Later, peeps!)


	5. Moody Much?

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, but hey, a gal can dream, right?

Jessie: Hiya people! Hope I didn't take _too_ long to update…

Joh: Not at all, Nee-san!

Jessie: …You sure?

Joh: **Nods happily** Shaw!

Jessie: Do you not see why I love my sis?

Joh: Aww!

Jessie: Warning, this chapter contains violent mood swings, rather odd antics from our favorite chibi, and a true sign of the apocalypse!

Joh: **Snickers**

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"Envy!" The Homunculus in question, currently draped across the couch, looked toward the doorway, where Ed had just appeared, smiling uncontrollably and looking slightly flushed from excitement. He was only wearing his underwear, and one of Envy's tops.

"Ne, what is it, Edo?" Envy asked, propping himself up into a sitting position. Ed hurried over to Envy, and stopped directly in front of him. Envy looked up into Ed's happy expression. Ed merely grabbed one of Envy's wrists, and pressed his hand gently against his abdomen.

Envy blinked in confusion, before realization hit him, and his eyes widened in shock. Seeing that Envy had noticed, Ed let go of Envy's wrist, watching his reaction quietly. Speechless, Envy moved his hand up, before slowly sliding it down, feeling the slight but definite swell on Ed's stomach. He looked up, still very wide-eyed into Ed's grinning face.

"I don't know whether to be horrified or ecstatic," he laughed sheepishly.

It had been three weeks since Al had visited the two to find out Ed was pregnant, and he made sure to call frequently, and ask if there were any signs of Ed showing. Just previously, the answer had always been "no," and while they were on the topic, Ed always said he was thankful he wasn't showing yet, and that he hoped he would remain thin as long as possible because he only had a month before his time off from work was up.

A sudden grin broke across Envy's face, and he pulled Ed down to sit on his lap. He wrapped his arms possessively around Ed's waist, and gently rubbed Ed's front.

"That's _my_ kid in there," he said smugly, giving Ed's tummy a gentle pat. Ed blushed slightly, but nodded.

"Told ya you wouldn't stay thin for long," Envy smirked as he kissed the back of Ed's neck. Ed was suddenly silent, and he lowered his head, bangs covering his eyes as the chibi got up, and his mood suddenly turned for the worst.

"Ne…O'chibi, what's wrong?" Envy asked, noticing the mood change at once. Ed glared daggers at the violet-eyed Homunculus.

"_WHO YOU CALLING SO FAT HE CAN'T GET OFF THE COUCH!" _Ed screamed at Envy. Envy looked slightly miffed, and stuck a finger into his ear.

"Sorry, I didn't catch that," he said sarcastically, blinking before smiling broadly at the furious alchemist.

"Did you just react the way you save when an insult is directed at your height to being called pregnant?" Envy asked slowly. Ed stared at Envy before he sniffled softly, the corners of his lips quivering dangerously. Envy's eyes widened.

'_Oh, _hell_ no, he is _not _gonna start to-'_

The blonde broke into tears.

"I'm fucking pregnant, it's _your_ child, and all you can point out is my stupidity," Ed wailed. Envy sweat dropped.

"Edo, I-I never said-" Ed's sobs become louder.

Envy closed his eyes, and counted to ten, listening to Ed's racking sobs and forcing himself to remain sane. He began thinking of the best way to deal with the situation of hand. The solution came to mind immediately, and, no matter how much he didn't want to say it so quickly into the argument, he _really_ wanted Ed to stop crying …

"…Alright, Ed. You're right. That was stupid. I'm…I'm _sorry_," Envy said in a rush. Ed's sobs ceased at once.

"Really?" He asked with a pathetic sniffle. Envy forced a bright smile.

"Yep." Ed smiled happily.

"Then you don't think I'm fat?"

"No, Ed. You're not fat. You're _pre_gnant," Envy pointed out. This seemed to have been the best possible answer Envy could have given, for Ed leaned down to peck Envy on the lips before he walked out of the room, humming softly to himself. Envy remained on the couch, before settling back down with a sigh. He closed his eyes, having every intention of returning to his nap.

'_Well, that was pretty…strange.'_

…Envy had absolutely no idea how much stranger it was going to get.

XxXxXxXxXx

"Envy!" Envy groaned and opened his eyes. There was Ed standing in the doorway to the kitchen, gazing at him with wide eyes.

"I dreamt I had a _–really– _short nap," he mumbled irritably as he sat up, rubbing the back of his hand across his eyes tiredly. Ed blinked innocently.

"But I left you alone for a full ten minutes!" Ed said sweetly, smiling angelically as he neared the Homunculus. Violet eyes blinked in a bored manner.

"…Edo?"

"Hmm?"

"…Whadya want?" Upon reaching Envy, Ed tilted his head to the side questioningly, and smiled coyly.

"Why, Envy! What on _earth_ would make you think I wanted something?" Ed exclaimed.

"No…really…lets get this over with quickly; what do you _want_, Ed?" Envy repeated the last part slowly. Ed sighed overdramatically, and plopped down next to Envy with a quiet _thump._ Ed lifted a hand and lazily traced Envy's features with a finger.

"Well, since you _insist_ on getting me something…" Ed trailed off, a smirk twitching on the corners of Ed's lips. Envy stared at him, waiting for Ed to continue.

"…Yes?" Envy pressed when there was no immediate answer. Ed's hand dropped down from Envy's face, and he smiled sweetly.

"…We don't have any milk." Envy raised an eyebrow, and stared at Ed expectantly.

"Yes. That's because I don't drink it, and you hate it," Envy explained casually.

"…But I want some," Ed whimpered. Envy tensed. Ed blinked in confusion as Envy began scooting cautiously away from him.

"…Who are you, and what the _fuck_ did you do with Edward Elric?" Envy asked, his eyes wide. Ed pouted slightly.

"What? So I'm not allowed to drink milk?"

"I thought you didn't drink "liquid secreted from a cow." Envy said dryly, making sure to quote the chibi for emphasis. Ed shrugged.

"Well, I want some now," Ed said slowly, as though he were explaining this to a small child. Envy continued to stare incredulously at the blonde.

"So? Will you get some for me?" Ed asked, putting on his best puppy-dog face. Envy remained frozen in a sitting position, staring wide-eyed at his lover.

'_It's only hormones, it's not permanent. It's only hormones, it's not permanent. **It is **_**only_ hormones, it is _not_ permanent_**_,' _Envy repeated in his mind. Suddenly snapping out of his reverie, he grinned at Ed.

"Sure thing, Edo," he finally replied, jumping to his feet and giving Ed a quick embrace before moving towards the door.

"Envy!" Envy stopped short in his tracks, took a deep breath, centered himself, and turned around, smiling broadly at Ed.

"Yes, Chibi?" He asked. If Ed had been any saner at the moment, he would have spotted at once that the comment sounded dangerously close to sarcasm. Right now, Ed's hormones were out of whack. (A/N: Poor Ed. He's short, pregnant, _and_ has hormonal issues…)

"That was a lame goodbye," Ed murmured, slinking towards the taller of the two. He pressed himself up against the Homunculus, and moved his hands to the back of Envy's head, entwining his fingers in Envy's green hair and drawing his head down to his to capture his lips in a deep kiss. Envy sighed in relief against Ed's lips, and kissed back heatedly, smirking inwardly when he felt Ed's knees buckle. His arms found their way around Ed's waist, and he gently pulled the chibi closer against himself.

It hit Envy when he felt Ed straining to hold their kiss that the poor blonde had to breathe. He broke away, grinning broadly at the flushed alchemist.

"…You _do_ know that you can get anyone to do anything you like with the way you kiss, right?" Envy chuckled. Ed grinned back, still panting for breath.

"Yeah, I know," he said, his grin turning smug.

'_Finally_,' Envy thought in relief, _'a hint of _my_ chibi.'_

"I'll be back in a bit, Edo," Envy said as he headed towards the door. He turned back a moment, and, after a quick wink sent Edward's way, he left the house. Ed waited until he heard the door close to plop back down onto the couch, and take Envy's position, crossing his arms behind his head as a pillow. He sighed contentedly; both he and Envy knew that he could _–never– _have been able to convince Envy to go out to get him something so easily.

Being pregnant _definitely_ had its advantages.

XxXxXxXxXx

Envy watched in horrified fascination as the blonde chibi brought the full glass of milk to his lips, and drank it without the slightest hint of a gag. Ed downed the milk in a mere ten seconds, and smiled happily as he placed the glass down on the kitchen counter.

"I guess I was wrong…milk isn't so bad," he chuckled to himself. Envy could only shake his head in amazement. First, Ed wants milks for the first time in years, then he admits to himself that he was wrong about something _in good humor_, all in the span of one measly hour. Incredible.

His mission of drinking milk hereby accomplished, Ed started toward the doorway to the living room. Envy sighed in resignation, picking up Ed's glass, and placing it in the sink. He turned around, hand on his hip, to stare after Ed in awe.

"Wow. So Ed performed the first perfect Human Transmutation, it actually _is_ possible for guys to get pregnant, and Edward Elric drank milk on his own accord. It really _must_ be the beginning of the end," Envy sighed, shrugging helplessly. Ed paused upon reaching the doorway to send a glance towards at Envy. A small smirk crossed his features.

"I've accomplished quite a few unbeatable feats in just a few short months, ne?" Ed teased. Envy grinned at him, and strode over to Ed, easily lifting the blonde into his arms as a spur-of-the-moment gesture.

"Yep," Envy chuckled as the alchemist blushed and futilely struggled to get out of his arms. Envy rolled his eyes playfully, and hugged the chibi even closer.

"Y'know, you're my two favorite people," he smirked. Giving up, Ed crossed his arms in a huff, and glowered at the Homunculus.

"Stupid walking palm tree," he muttered under his breath.

"Yep, he still loves me!" Envy stated matter-of-factly, making his way out of the kitchen with his "two favorite people" in tow.

He deposited Ed gently down onto the couch in a sitting position, and stood over the blonde, staring down at him. Ed blinked up at him a few times before…starting to cry.

"Do you always have to point out how short I am? You insensitive bastard!" Ed said tearfully, before breaking down into loud sobs. Right before Envy was _entirely _sure he was about to crack, an idea popped into his mind out of nowhere. Ignoring the occasional insults thrown at him, he sat himself down behind his blonde chibi. Ed turned his head to look at him.

"What are you doing?" Ed sniffed.

There was no vocal response, but Ed felt Envy's hands on his shoulders. Ed tensed as hands gripped them lightly, his misery haven given way to curiosity in the span of ten seconds. Gradually, he relaxed back against Envy's body as the Homunculus gave him a gentle massage. Envy leaned forward to kiss Ed's cheek, before moving back, a smug expression on his face.

Ed closed his eyes, and sat quietly, enjoying his free massage. What he failed to notice was the slow, yet steady rate that Envy's hands were lowering at.

Ed held back from jumping in surprise, but gasped when Envy's hand slipped under his pants and underwear in a fluid motion, his fingers rubbing gently against his shaft.

Ed opened his mouth to speak, but could only manage to get out a quiet whimper. Knowing that Ed had no intension of moving away anytime soon, Envy pressed up against Ed's back as close as he could, and set about removing Ed's shirt with his free hand. Upon succeeding in pulling it up over Edward's head, he flung it carelessly across the room.

Ed started to let out a moan of disappointment, but it caught in his throat as Envy's focused turned to his neck. Moving so that he had the alchemist pinned under his arms, he continued attacking Ed's neck.

Envy's eyes wandered to the spot he had left a bite a while ago, and, noticing it was almost completely gone he tsked loudly. Ed's eyes opened halfway, and moved to look at Envy, but closed again in pleasure as Envy's lips pressed against his neck. He tensed when Envy unexpectedly bit down roughly, but his eyes closed when Envy kissed the bite softly.

"Envy, w-we shouldn't b-be--" Ed's sentence ended abruptly, as Ed shuddered violent in response to Envy's fingers lightly trailing across his chest. Envy lowered his head, and nipped Ed's ear.

"Relax; we're not doing anything that could hurt the baby, right?" Envy whispered huskily, licking behind Ed's ear and gaining a loud gasp in response. Envy moved back up, smirking down at the now wide-eyed alchemist. His fingers brushed against Ed's hardened member, and Ed immediately clamped his eyes shut, nodding furiously.

Envy chuckled, and leaned down to claim Ed's lips in a hot kiss. Ed moaned into Envy's mouth, and Envy stifled a sigh; both were very much aware how much they had sorely missed the sexual activity. Envy slipped his hand into Ed's pants, when--

_**Briiiing**_

Envy closed his eyes, and inwardly cursed off the person who had invented doorbells as fluently as he knew how. With a sigh, he reluctantly removed his hand from Ed's pants, leaning over to kiss Ed apologetically, before getting up and moving to the front door. He opened it, and opened his mouth to speak, but was rudely interrupted.

_**Clang**_

"_What the _fuck_?"_ Envy growled, clutching his head where he had been hit in the head with a… with a _what?_ Whatever it was, it was something very, _very_ hard and _definitely_ metal, with his experience with an easily irritated lover (cursed) with an automail arm.

Envy looked up, rubbing his sore head with an arm to see… a blonde girl with clear blue eyes blinking in astonishment.

"_You're_ not Ed!" She gasped, blushing furiously.

"No, I'm _not_," Envy agreed. She blinked, and looked Envy up and down.

"Oh my God! I'm so sor--" She blinked again, and her eyes narrowed.

"Are you Envy, then?" She asked suspiciously.

"Yeah," he said breezily.

_**Clang**_

"What the fuck is _wrong _with you!" Envy yelled angrily, taking two huge staggering steps back to rub his head gingerly. The girl glared menacingly.

"This is all your fault! Al came back, and has been talking non-stop about Ed being _pregnant. _I don't know what you said to him, but your story must have been pretty whacked up to have been able to make a sharp kid like him believe that guys can get pregnant. _Please_ explain to him--" she broke off at this point to drag someone out form behind the open door. Alphonse Elric came into view, looking very nearly as miserable as Ed had during his mood swings before.

"--That it is very impossible for guys to have babies," she finished. Al smiled weakly at Envy.

"Hello, Envy," he greeted, only to be smacked over the head with Winry's wrench. He winced and muttered a soft "ow", but otherwise seemed immune to the blow (A/N: I wonder _why_, with Winry swinging that wrench around pretty much _all_ the time, right?).

Envy saw Winry's eyes move from him to behind him, and with a yell, she threw her trusty wrench over Envy's shoulder. There was a resounding "_ow!_" and _thump._ Envy spun around, wide-eyed, to see Ed had fallen onto his knees, rubbing his head and moaning. Winry ran over toward him, and picked up her wrench.

"Winry, please!" Ed yelled, covering his head with his arms as he saw her poised to hit him again.

"You idiot! What did you say to your brother!" She yelled, bringing her wrench down to hit Ed. He dodged it, and got to his feet, running around her while she bent over to pick up her wrench, and cowering behind Envy.

"Who the hell is that?" Envy whispered. Ed winced.

"M-my mechanic…and old next-door neighbor," he replied shakily. Envy's eyes widened.

"Hey! I'm nowhere near done with you, Edward Elric!" Winry hollered, noticing the loss of their attention at once. Al hurried over to her when he saw her bring her arm back to throw her wrench at Ed (or Envy, whichever was more misfortunate).

"Winry, stop! Stop, and I'll tell you what's been going on!" Ed yelled. Winry slowly brought her weapon down to her side.

"Promise?" Ed hurriedly nodded.

"Cross my heart and hope to _live_!"

XxXxXxXxXx

"But you're a guy," Winry repeated slowly for the tenth time. Ed sighed in exasperation. They had explained what had happened, and had been trying to convince her for the past hour that Ed was really pregnant. Ed closed his eyes and willed himself not to scream at Winry in frustration. She had every right not to believe a single word he said…no matter how true it was.

"I know. But with alchemy, some of our logic really doesn't come into play," Ed tried. Winry blinked.

"But you're a guy."

"Winry, things that may seem impossible to us can be accomplished with alchemy," Al said. Envy, who was currently tipped back in his chair at the kitchen table smirked.

"Yeah. Like me," he said smugly, gesturing to himself with his thumb. Winry looked lost for a comeback for the first time.

"Yeah. Winry, please, I'm telling the truth. I. Am. _Pregnant,_" Ed said through his teeth, blushing furiously. Struck with inspiration, he got up out of his chair and moved so that he stood next to Winry. He grabbed he hand, and pressed it against his abdomen.

"See?" Winry's eyes widened, and she gasped upon feeling the swell on Ed's front. Al brightened up immediately.

"Ed, you're showing?" He asked excitedly. Ed's blush increased as he nodded. In the time Winry was rendered speechless, Al got up and turned Ed so that he could see for himself.

"Can I feel, Onii-chan?" Al begged. Ed smiled at his little brother, and nodded again, though this time in consent. Al gently pressed his hand against Ed's front, and grinned broadly when he slid his hand down. He finally removed his hand and smiled at Ed happily.

"Oh, and congratulations; you officially finished your first trimester!" he exclaimed brightly. Winry looked totally lost.

"Y-Y-You mean…y-you were s-seri--"

"Yep. Edo and I discovered he was three months pregnant a month ago," Envy said proudly, snacking an arm possessively around Ed's waist, and pulling him against himself. Winry blinked disbelievingly.

"You mean…in five months…" she said so quietly that the three boys leaned forward to hear her.

"_I'm gonna be an _aunt!" Winry shrieked in delight, clasping her hands together. The boys stared at her –it was _their_ turn to be speechless– and sweatdropped in unison.

"Ooh! I hope it's a little girl!" Winry said starry-eyed, lifting her clasped hands to her chin. Ed laughed nervously.

"Eheh…eh, well, w-we don't know whether its gonna be a boy or a…a girl…" Ed and Envy exchanged glances. They honestly hadn't thought about gender preferences.

"…Well I don't mind whether it's a boy or a girl," Ed announced.

"Same," Envy said simply. Al grinned at Ed.

"Well, I kinda want a boy. It'd be so neat to have a nephew," he sighed dreamily. Winry glared at him.

"Well I want a girl," Winry said, stamping her foot for emphasis. Al glared back.

"Its gonna be a boy."

"No, it's gonna be a _girl._"

"I want a nephew!"

"Well, I want a niece!"

Ed blushed, and shuffled his feet in embarrassment. Envy merely kissed the top of the chibi's head affectionately, and watched the two in amusement. Al turned to look at Ed, and smiled.

"Hey, Ed, make sure to have twins so me and Winry can both have our way," he teased.

"Tw_-twi…twins?"_

_Slump_

Envy's eyes widened as Ed slumped back against him in a dead faint. He knew he was probably a bit pale as well from shock.

"_Ed!_ Al, you _idiot_!" Winry yelled, realizing that mentioning twins for one of the first times had caused Ed to pass out on the spot. Al's hands covered his mouth, which hung slightly open.

"…Oops." Envy lifted the unconscious blonde into his arms bridal-style, and grinned at the two visitors.

"It's okay. Ed hasn't been getting all the much sleep with the morning sickness, anyway," he shrugged slightly, shifting Ed so that he was in a more comfortable position in his arms. He turned to head up the stairs to bring Ed to their bedroom.

"And he needs all the rest he can get before he returns to _work_ next week." With that, Envy made his way up the stairs, Winry and Al staring after the Homunculus until he disappeared from view. The two exchanged glances. Their eyes narrowed in unison.

"Boy--!"

"--Girl!"

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: Aw…poor Ed had a …_bad _reaction to the thought of multiple kids!

Joh: Shaw!

Jessie: And there's Winry's reaction to the discovery of Ed's pregnancy!

Joh: **Laughs** Now Winry knows also!

Jessie: Yep!

Joh: Now who's left to figure it out?

Jessie: Who else, but Eastern Command?

Joh: **Gasps** I wanna see _their_ reactions! Es_pecially_ Roy's!

Jessie: **Grins** You're gonna have to keep on reading to see what happens, ne?

Joh: Yeah! Go Sis!

Jessie: **Blushes** Aw, aishiteru, Joh-chan!

Joh: **Glomps** Wo ai ni!

J twins: **Huggles**

Jessie: Hope you people enjoyed the latest chapter! If you review, you get a magical plate of your favie kind of cookies that will never empty, and a stick of cotton candy (the different colored kind)! Now it's the fourth month of Ed's pregnancy! There are still five months left (five months for Envy to bear with). Look forward to Ed's return to work in the next chappie: is he gonna be able to hide his condition for a while longer? Keep on reading to find out!

Tisska01: Definitely where the fun began! Al's lucky to have caught them! Glad you thought Al's character was good **Breathes out in relief** Seriously, I was reaaaally trying hard. Thank you!

Kakashisninjadogs: He's short, a guy, _and_ hormonal to top it off! Poor, poor Edo XD **Finds you in the shoebox under the sink **Um...you can come out now… Though yeah…Winry's reactions to things _can_ be pretty scary… **Sobs** But I thought this reaction suited her…whadya think of this chappie?

Firehedgehog: I updated quickly! _And_ I've been practicing my evil laugh, see? _Mwahahahaha!_ Successes! **Dances**

Forever Yours Zana: Poor Al, and his poor, polluted mind, right? No way! I would've _loved_ to have been in _his_ shoes. No fair! **Smirks** Ed has a _bit_ of a high libido in this chapter, no? Heh, Envy _does_ have a quite obvious sex drive, I must admit. But that's common knowledge! **Laughs** Ed's very, _very_ mood-swingy! Hope you enjoyed it.

Solo Maxwell-Yamato:** Blushes** Aw shux now, you shouldn't…but I'm glad you are (jk) You're so nice! You rock! **Hands another cookie** Since you seem to like cookies so much!

Kaoru Gal: Sis, I'm glad you like it so much! ** Kisses and huggles** And don't worry, you're perfect to _me!_ **Frolics with**

Me And My God Complex: Dirty dreams…but who says he won't enjoy them? **Shifty eyes** What if Al's secretly a pervert? Nooo! Poor, poor innocent Al! Yes, Al knows, and now Winry does, too!

HolyMistress: You inspired me with the "OH MY GOD I'M GONNA BE AN AUNT!" thing XD Thanks! You totally rock, girl! **Huggles**

dream-whizper: Yay! I'm glad I wasn't _that_ far off (from the FMA movie, at _least_)! Al takes things great, ne? Now Winry… **Whispers** _Issues_. Hope you enjoyed the chappie! Glad you like the fic so far! **Huggles**

ArtemisRoseShadow: Yaay! Glad _my_ fic was the one to catch your interest! I'm trying to keep up the good work, _and_ update quickly! Is it comin' along okay?

shu-chan77901: **Smiles** Glad you did.

envy's flame: No, you're totally right, and I'm (partially) un-sugar high! Go EnvyxEd! Whoot! **Obsesses like the good fangirl I am**

(Thanks for reading, and I hope you're all still enjoying the fic! Please review, and give me your opinions of the chapter. If you reviewed, I love you! Look forward to future updates! Buh bye for now!)


	6. Back to Work

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, but I do actually own this really awesome, _really_ comfy blanket that has Ed on it, and says his name! **Huggles blanket**

Jessie: Waaaah! I haven't updated in forever! I'm sooo sorry! **Sobs**

Joh: **Pats Jessie on the back** There, there, baby.

Jessie: **Sniffs** Ugh, I'm having sooo much goin' on… Life's sooo busy. **Sighs** It sucks….

Joh: Daijobu datte!

Jessie: **Laughs** And that was "words of wisdom from my sis!" Well, readers, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Oh yeah, and _Maes Hughes_ is alive in this fic (cuz I love Hughes, and cuz he just totally rocks)!

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"_Edward!"_

Before Ed even had the time to jump at the sudden cry, five brand new pictures of Elysia were shoved in his face out of nowhere.

Who, you ask, was the action was performed by? (A/N: Okay, maybe you don't need to ask, but I'll just tell you anyway) It was none other than… Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes. The raven-haired man smiled proudly at the startled chibi.

"Isn't my Elysia adorable?" He exclaimed. Ed could practically _see_ the little hearts around Hughes' head (or maybe he wasn't even _imagining_ it…) Hughes stepped back, carefully replacing the pictures in his pocket.

"Did you have a good break? Anything _unusual_ happen?" Hughes teased cheerfully, giving Ed a proper greeting: a sloppy salute.

"…You could _definitely _say that" Ed said with a tired smile, returning the salute half-heartedly. Hughes blinked; undoubtedly, Ed's answer was an unexpected one.

Lime green eyes studied the chibi, who was quietly fingering the silver chain to his State Alchemist's watch with his left hand. The two slowly started walking down the corridor. Ed looked around, frowning slightly.

"Where _is_ everyone?" Ed asked curiously.

"They have their time off as those who were off return," Hughes answered. "You were one of the fewer people who chose to have their time off in the beginning of the year. Most chose to have their break later."

"Leaving us with everything to do, am I right?" Ed grumbled, stuffing his hands into his pockets. Hughes grinned.

"Unfortunately," he laughed.

They had made it a little further down, when Ed came to an abrupt halt. Hughes stopped the moment he realized Ed wasn't following him, and turned to face the blonde chibi.

"Ed, what's wrong?" he quickly asked upon seeing the state the blonde was in. All the color had drained from Ed's face, and the teen was gripping his stomach. Curing under his breath, Ed dashed down the hall in the general direction of the restroom. He heard Hughes call his name after him, before footsteps announced that the man had chosen to follow him. Ed was running so fast, he'd lost Hughes by the time he'd rounded the second corner. He sprinted down the hall and, once in front of the restroom, skidded to a stop and ran in.

Upon entering the restroom, Ed fell to his knees, throwing up violently into the nearest toilet. After five minutes he sat back, panting heavily. He wiped away a trickle of sweat that ran down the side of his face, and made a disgusted noise as he flushed down the emptied contents of his stomach.

"You just can't keep _anything_ down, can ya?" Ed muttered irritably, sending what was more of a pout than a glare towards the now-more-than-slightly-evident swell on his stomach.

"Edward?" Ed gave a start as a hand came to rest gently on his shoulder. He made to turn his head, but the hand moved up to catch his chin. Slowly, First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye came into view. She gazed down at Ed, a hint of softness –visible only to those who knew her– was apparent in her eyes.

"L-Lieutenant Hawkeye," Ed gasped, hastily saluting the woman. She returned the salute. He hadn't heard her come in.

"What just happened, Edward? I was bringing a stack of paperwork to the Colonel's office, when you rushed past." Ed tried to stop the blush rising to his face.

"I-it's nothing…nothing…I've just been ill as of late," Ed said, not daring to catch the woman's eye. Her gaze remained fixed unwaveringly on the younger alchemist.

"…Edward, you _do_ know that you can tell me anything, and be sure that it will be kept confidential, don't you?" Hawkeye asked suddenly, her composure as cool as ever. Ed looked up in surprise; such warm words were rarely heard directly from the woman's lips. He gulped nervously, and slowly shook his head.

"Thank you very much, Hawkeye but its – its just something me and En-- _I _have to deal with on my own," Ed said, quickly covering his mistake. He'd been able to keep his and Envy's relationship a secret from his friends from Eastern Command, and he wasn't about to let it slip so easily now.

"If you're sure, Edward," Hawkeye said, helping Ed to his feet. He watched silently as she picked up the neat stack of papers placed on the floor by the doorway.

"Now, I have to go to the Colonel's office to bring him these papers that he needs to sign."

"Aah. The bastard's slackin' off already," Ed scoffed. If Ed hadn't known better, he would have sworn there was a small smile on the woman's lips. But everyone knew Hawkeye never showed emotion.

"Alright, Edward, I'll see you la-- _Edward!"_ Hawkeye gasped as he fell back down onto his knees to throw up again.

There was the sound of falling papers, before cool fingers brushed against his neck and a hand gathered the hair threatening to fall into his face. Another hand rubbed his back soothingly. It was just like what Envy did at home.

Finally, after he'd emptied his stomach for the third time, the blonde flushed the toilet again, shaking slightly. Again he was assisted to his feet.

"Th-thanks," he muttered, his face burning with embarrassment. He moved over to the sinks and turned on the cold water. Hawkeye studied Ed as he splashed water against his face.

"…You're very sick, Edward. Are you sure you don't need to see a doctor?" Hawkeye inquired, starting to collect the fallen papers.

"I'm fine-- really. It usually starts to let up later into the day," Ed said, cautiously bending down to pick up the papers closest to his feet. After all of the papers were gathered and back in a neat pile in Hawkeye's arms, the two left the restroom. When Hawkeye reached the door to the Colonel's office, she turned to face the golden-eyed teen.

"Remember, Edward, if you ever find you need to talk, you can count on me," she said quietly, before striding through the door to the Colonel. Ed stared after the woman for a moment, before he turned—to come face-to-face with…

"Oh, _Edward!_ How I've _missed _you!" (Sparkle, sparkle).

Guess who?

"_Noooooo-- Argh!"_

XxXxXxXxXx

Colonel Roy Mustang tilted his chair back, staring at the chibi seated across from him at his desk. A smirk twitched obviously on the corners of his lips, and he placed all four legs of the chair back onto the floor, resting his elbows on the desk and taping his fingers together.

"Well, well… If it isn't the Fullmetal Alchemist, back from his vacation. Dear me… have you gotten…" he trailed off, pretending to study the chibi carefully. Ed glowered at him, as if daring him to continue the sentence.

"…_Larger_ since the last time I met you?" Ed's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. Seeing this reaction, the Flame Alchemist laughed heartily.

"Oh, no, _no._ _Not_ in the height sense, by all means. I meant in your _width."_

_Slam._

"_WHO YOU CALLING SO FAT HE CAN'T GET THROUGH THE FUCKING COLONEL BASTARD'S OFFICE DOOR!" _Ed shrieked furiously, having jumped to his feet and slapped his hands down against the desk. Roy blinked, only slightly miffed by the outburst.

"Why, Fullmetal, if I hadn't _known_ any better, I would have thought you would have had the same reaction before," Roy smirked.

Hawkeye stifled a sigh from behind Roy as she waited for the inevitable fight to unfold. Hughes peeked into the room, obviously interested by the conversation.

"Not only are you _short_, but you've gained weight. What kind of State Alchemist is both short _and_ stout?"

Ed stared at the man, dumbstruck. Roy waited for the blonde's reaction in a smug silence…

…Which was ultimately broken as the teen began to sob loudly.

"You stupid Colonel _bastard,"_ Ed wailed. Roy blinked dumbly, and opened his mouth, though no words came out.

The Colonel knew just as well as anyone who tricky it was to see the blonde cry. It _never_ took just a few random insults… until now.

As Roy's lack of the ability to speak lengthened, Hawkeye walked over to Edward, and patted him comfortingly on the back. After sending a disapproving look back towards the Colonel, Hawkeye guided the teen (who was starting to calm down enough to start feeling embarrassed) past a stunned Hughes and out of the room.

Two hallways, a left, and one empty room later Hawkeye ushered Ed into the office of an officer on vacation. Ed had managed to stop crying, and was rubbing his eyes tiredly with the back of his left hand. Hawkeye pulled out a chair and silently commanded the blonde to sit.

"I believe you were about to tell me what's going on," Hawkeye asked, though it was more of a command rather than a question. In his current state of mind, the thought of his present condition caused tears to spring to his eyes once again. Seeing that he was so close to another breakdown, Hawkeye tried another tactic.

"Edward, you're going to keep having this reaction if you don't let anyone help you," Hawkeye gripped his shoulder gently as she tried to reason with him. Ed suddenly seemed lost in his observation of the floor.

Minutes of silence passed. Then:

"Alright, Edward. I see you have no intention of talking. But remember, you can talk to me if you feel the need," Hawkeye said, and with a sigh, she got up to leave. As she turned to walk to the door, a hand grabbed her wrist. She turned to see golden eyes gazing at her.

Submissively, Hawkeye sat back down in her seat, hands clasped loosely in her lap. She watched Ed take a deep breath as he obviously prepared himself to open up.

"Edward, I know it may be hard to believe, but whatever the situation is, it probably can't be as complicated as you think it is," Hawkeye reassured him. Ed laughed weakly, and ran a hand through his long, golden bangs.

"I'm pretty sure this is the _definition_ of complicated."

"Try me."

"I'm pregnant."

XxXxXxXxXx

Forty-five minutes later Roy looked up wearily from the paper he was currently signing to the sound of knocking. The door opened and revealed Hawkeye with Ed in tow. She guided him to the chair, before choosing to stand behind him.

Immediately, Roy noticed that Ed's mood had lightened considerably. And though he would never admit it, he was curious as to why Ed had had such a rash mood swing; he cared more about his subordinates than he let on. And he knew them better than any of them thought.

For instance… Roy's eyes traveled to the woman standing by Ed. She must have sensed him looking at her, for her eyes met his. She nodded slightly in acknowledgement. Sure, her face was carefully coaxed into its usual emotionless mask, but he knew he was _definitely_ receiving a different vibe.

Being the Colonel, he easily recognized all of his subordinates' usual vibes. And so he immediately spotted that her usual calm and patient vibe was replaced by an unusually childish: "I-know-something-you-don't-know-and-boy-are-you-in-for-it" vibe.

"Fullmetal, would you mind explaining to me what happened before?" Roy inquired. Ed turned his head slightly, making brief eye contact with Hawkeye, and, after a reassuring nod, he turned back to the dark-haired man.

Ed was well aware that he would deeply regret what he was about to do when Roy started cracking jokes. He knew that he had to be extraordinarily cautious to make sure the secret didn't leak out. But he also knew that Envy was right every one of the hundred times he'd repeated it; that the rest of his friends in the military would keep it confidential.

…Plus, he and Hawkeye hadn't spent the last ten minutes of their absence in the empty office planning this for nothing.

And after all, Roy had just initiated it, like Hawkeye had said he would.

On cue, Hawkeye turned fully to face the Colonel.

"Sir, may I speak?" Hawkeye said. Roy looked back at her, and nodded curtly.

"Edward cannot help it…not in his current condition. His sudden mood-swings are just an unfortunate side-effect," Hawkeye explained calmly. Roy blinked.

"'Side-effect' of what?" Roy finally asked when neither continued the conversation. Ed blinked.

"Oh, you don't recognize the symptoms?" He asked sounding surprised. By this point, Roy was well aware that they were leading him somewhere, and having a fine time.

"Sir, don't you remember when Gracia visited with Maes?" Hawkeye asked. Roy raised an eyebrow in confusion; now, if possible, he felt even more lost than he had before.

"Hawkeye, the last time Gracia came down to the station was when she was five months preg…" Roy stopped abruptly, and stared wide eyed at the teen sitting across from him, smiling innocently.

"No…that's not possible," Roy muttered.

"Colonel, don't you remember my failed experiment a few months back? Well… lets just say it wasn't a failure," Ed said, his smile broadening every second.

"You mean-"

"I performed the first successful human transmutation! And I'm having a baby in five months!"

And although the young alchemist knew he had probably just lost all of what was left of his masculinity, he decided that it had _definitely_ been worth it; just to see the Colonel gape continuously so that he made the perfect imitation of a goldfish before turning pale and excusing himself from the room to question all logic made it worth all the while.

Ed turned to face Hawkeye, a sly grin on his lips.

"That was _perfect,_" he sighed happily, stretching out on the chair.

"The Colonel really needed something to being him to his senses; he's been slacking off even more ever since he came back from his vacation," Hawkeye noted.

"Do you suppose he won't think to start cracking the jokes for a while?" Ed asked hopefully. Before the woman could respond, Hughes stuck his head through the door, grinning slyly.

"He probably would have, he's in _such_ a state a shock," Hughes sighed overdramatically, shaking his head in mock sympathy.

"It's a good thing he has a great friend like _me_ to remind him to, which I should be going to check up on right about now," he teased.

After finishing his statement, the man turned to run for his life. Nobody who happened to be passing through that same hall questioned the sight of a grown man giggling evilly with a red-faced, furious/mortified chibi on his heels, shouting death threats after him. The fact that the person being chased was Maes Hughes was explanation enough.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: Aw… Ed's achieved another amazing prospect! Because of him, Roy's finally been forced to question of everything he's ever learned about sex! **Tries to stiffle laughter**

Joh: **Shakes head** That poor, poor womanizer…

Jessie: **Laughs** Yeah, no kidding. Aaah! I love Hughes! He's so awesome (that's the one thing I'll never forgive Envy for… **Sobs**)! Geez… It appears Ed wasn't able to keep his secret from more than three people for long, ne?

Joh: Nya nya!

Jessie: **Shrugs **Ah, well… it must be okay, so long as it was to his _advantage_ **Giggles **God, seeing Roy's reaction must have _totally _been worth it!

Joh: Oh yeah! **Laughs**

Jessie: Yup! _Soooo_… I reaaaaally hope it was an adequate update… I really did work hard… **Sighs**

Joh: **Smiles** Shaw it was!

Jessie: **Happy **Aww! I love ya!

Joh: I love you too!

J twins: **Huggles**

Jessie: Again, I apologize for the update having taken forever… there's a _lot _going on… and I'm _really_ busy. Thank you _so_ much for being patient, and bearing with me. I probably am going to be able to update a few more chapters before summer stuff catches up with me. And the fun is only _just_ starting! Remember, Envy's gonna have to deal with Ed's pregnancy for five more months! And Ed's gonna really have to keep careful about not spilling his secret to the world, ne? If you reviewed, thanks you sooo much! I love ya! You get an Edvy fan bracelet and a cupcake! Whoo! Read on, good readers!

angel61991: **Squeals** I'm glad ya think its good so far. Hope you continue to enjoy it; please lemme know!

Illusionwolf: You know, I think that this review is one of the most special and rewarding ones I've ever received. I know how it feels to read a fanfiction, and grow to love a paring due to it. You really made my day by saying this; thank you sooo much! **Huggles**

DEATHxBYxPAPERCUTS: Well, if you're demented by thinking that EnvyxEd is hotter due to the fact that they're half-brothers… I am too! Hahahaha… Yup, yaoi is da BOMB! I'm sooo happy you like my ficcys! S'aank you for da nice review. (A pregnant _Winry_? **Hides in bomb shelter with lots of cookies** You can join me if you want… that's horrifying…)

loathed wolf spirit: I hope I will!

Inuyasha-Oddishness: I lurv you for reviewing! Thanks!

SoulfulZen: Glad you think its well done. Ever heard of C-section? **Shudders** Poor Edo… Thanks for reviewing!

Chibi-chibi-kun: I'm sorry I didn't update sooner! Please forgive me! I tried hard to update with my life so hectic… Glad you think it's awesome, though!

darkangel36: Hope Roy's reaction was good enough for ya! I thought it was the most Roy-like.

Shakespeare'sWorstNightmare: **Nods** Yeah, poor Edo, but EnvyxEd does totally rock!

Rivalovery: Yaaaay! I have a great mind! Yes. Envy needed some sympathy, so the pain goes straight to Ed! **Laughs** I know… I can be evil (on occasion) but… c'mon, Envy _really_ needed a break!

Light-Hideko: **Pats back** Don't worry… I have a paronia of the same thing. Metal objects + thrown + contact with head **Shudder **Anyhoo (yay, new favie word!) I'm glad you liked the mood swings and the milk. Hope you liked this chappie!

Firehedgehog: **Nods** I shall continue indeed.

NaitoKitsune: **Smirks** This is Envy we're talking about… You expect Envy to let himself be forced to go 5 _months_ without sex? **Laughs** I know; I'm evil. N'ways, yes, indeed Winry has lost her sanity. What kind of sane girl would throw a wrench? Gosh… **Looks about and hides evidence **(j/k)

Kaoru Gal: Your review made me laugh sooo hard, babe! **Giggles** Less than a month till caaaamp! Whee! **Glomps and kisses **Aishiteru!

Tisska01: **Dances** I'm soooo happy you enjoyed the mood swings sooo much! I hope this chapter was up to your standards as well… I really hope you continue to enjoy my fic!

Firelover666: …That's so cruel **Cracks up** Flubberblubberblibberblob! You'll see what happens in time! Rainbow fishies forever!

aruslym: Do you know that I laughed so hard upon reading your review, I actually fell off the couch? I'm sorry… I couldn't stop the aliens! **Sobs**

HolyMistress: **Starry eyed** You gave me cake! And you gave me my favorite kinds of cake! I love you! **Huggles** **and joins you in looking out the window** Hey! I think I do see a flying pig! Oh… now, wait… that's just a whale. Okay, no worries! Hahaha! Aaah, I miiiiss you! I wanna talk with ya sooo bad! I'm just totally busy right now. I'm glad you liked the chappie so much! You rock so much!

Forever Yours Zana: Here's your next chappie! I hope you thought it was okay. I'm really glad you seem to enjoy my writing fic so much!

Sadistic Sycho: But wasn't it? **Smiles** Nope, you're right! Hahaha! Aah, Edvy forever **Hands a Edvy fan pin** Yay EnvyxEd! Whoot!

Me And My God Complex: You know, writing it made me smile a lot. **Grins** Hope your enjoying the fic as much as I'm enjoying writing it for you guys (which is a _lot,_ by da way)!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Blushes **You're sooo nice! Thank you for all of your nice comments! **Hands you your favorite ice cream** Glad you like my ficcy!

razatip: I totally agree; hitting pregnant people is rude, crude and socially unacceptable! Just wanna take this opportunity to say I adore your fics sooo much! Okay… I'm happy now! Hope you keep on enjoying da fic!

shu-chan77901: Congrats on becoming a cousin **Smiles and hands flowers** Congratulate your aunt for me, that's so awesome! I'm the oldest of mine! I love them! Yes, poor Envy _and_ Edo! The two are suffering for different reasons. Hope this update as good enough for ya!

envy's flame: It's next time **Laughs** Glad you r thought the chappie was good… was this one okay, too? I hope it was…

(Thanks you all so much for your patience! I hope you all continue enjoying my fic! I'm working very hard to please you guys, and I hope I'm doing it! Please review! Taa for now!)


	7. Reflections

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist…_yet_…heh…

Jessie: Yay! I actually found time to update!

Joh: **Claps** Haazah!

Jessie: I know, right? Yay for me! _And_ it's the longest chapter yet!

Joh: **Pats back** Good job!

Jessie:I feel special. N'ways, here the next chappie of my FMA fic! I started planning it the day after I'd posted the next chapter.

Joh: Ahead a time, much?

Jessie: **Grins** Maaaybe… I was so sad; I didn't get to put any EnvyxEd **cough**_action_**cough** in the last chappie, sooo…

Joh: **Snickers in background**

Jessie: Yup! I think you get da point. Envy will be in this chapter and there'll be some Dr. Brian at the beginning… but after _that?_ Oh, it'll be just a _nice_, _calm_ weekend for Envy and Ed at home… _alone._

(Is calm even in Envy's vocabulary? I think not!)

**Warning:** **Yaoi** lemon. If you don't wanna read it, don't read past the **XoX** marks.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

A loud noise from outside the office caused Dr. Brian Setzar to give a start. He listened intently to the voice only now accompanying what now sounded like someone furiously stomping, and relaxed. He walked over towards the front of the room to open the door, but was forced to jump aside as the door was flung open, very nearly hitting him in the face. Brian gulped and sweatdropped, taking a moment to breathe deeply before cautiously peering around the door. He immediately came face-to-face with calm, violet eyes.

"Hey," Envy nodded at him in acknowledgement. Brian bit back a smile when he noticed Envy was easily containing a blonde, angry, obviously pregnant Edward with an arm.

"Lemme go, bastard! That fucking moron fucking called me _SHORT!"_ Ed howled, futilely struggling to get out from Envy's grasp.

"He was a five year old boy, Ed," Envy said with an exaggerated sigh.

"B-but I-- …H-he--…" Ed struggled to maintain the argument, all the while knowing he was fighting a loosing battle. Although in his hesitation, the blonde seemed to finally take notice of the more-than-slightly amused doctor, as a blush sprung to his face.

"I take it your pregnancy haven't changed you a bit, Edward," Brian said with a small smile. Ed removed himself from Envy's grasp, and crossed his arms, a scowl completing his usual mask.

"Yeah, yeah, whadeva, Doc," Ed grumbled, refusing to make eye contact as he fought back his blush. Brian merely offered Ed a chair in response. Ed sat down and responded with what sounded like a mumbled "thanks." Envy immediately took residence behind his chibi's chair, bending over to wrap his arms possessively around Ed's shoulders.

Brian quickly scanned over the notes taken from Ed's last visit, and whistled loudly when he read the date.

"Wow. You're already five months along. Already in your second trimester, Edward," Brian said, inconspicuously glancing at the two from the corner of his eye every so often while he jotted down some new observations on his ever-present clipboard.

At Brian's announcement, Ed accomplished a combination of blushing and paling. Envy nuzzled his face into his hair, and murmured something into Ed's ear that made the young alchemist relax.

Brian grinned as he watched Envy's hand gradually made its way down to come to rest on Ed's stomach. Eventually, Brian coughed politely, and Envy reluctantly pulled a second seat from the desk over so he could sit next to Ed.

"So. How's your morning sickness been?" Brian teased. Ed glowered.

"Shut up."

"Hmm. From the sounds of it, it hasn't eased up at all," Brian noted helpfully, talking more or less to himself, as he tapped his pen against his chin before quickly scribbling something down. Ed rolled his eyes.

"No shit, Sherlock," Ed groaned, rubbing his face with a hand irritably. He looked up at the doctor with a slightly pleading look in his eye.

"Doc, are you sure there is nothing you can give me to stop it?" Ed asked, nearly begging. Brian looked at him sympathetically.

"Sorry, Ed. There's no kind of medication that can stop it completely," Brian shrugged helplessly. Ed slumped over, and it was as if a dark cloud suddenly surrounded him. It looked like he was preparing to wallow in self-pity.

"…But I _can _give you something to help with the nausea," Brian said as an afterthought. The cloud lifted, and Ed perked up immediately.

"Really?"

Brian nodded affirmatively. Ed looked as though he'd won the lottery.

"Score!" He cheered happily. Envy snorted slightly, and rolled his eyes playfully.

"Any other unfortunate side-effects of pregnancy bugging you?" Brian asked. Ed opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by a cry from Envy.

"The fucked up cravings! They're _awful!_ I swear, they're fucking around with his mind," Envy groaned. Ed blushed bright red, and let his head drop into his hand in embarrassment.

"_Envy!"_ He hissed angrily. Brian chuckled.

"Oh, really? Like what?"

"He…drank…" Envy paused, and brought the back of his hand across his closed eyes dramatically. Then, suddenly, Envy was looking at Brian with all seriousness.

"…_Milk,_" he whispered almost inaudibly. Brian blinked and laughed.

"I'm just taking a guess, but from the sounds of it, this is really big deal coming from Ed?"

Envy only nodded his assent. Brian looked thoughtful.

"You know, a lot of pregnant women get cravings for _chocolate_," Brian noted with a smile. Envy raised an eyebrow.

"Chocolate?" Envy asked dubiously, gaining an affirmative nod from Brian.

Envy froze upon sensing he was being stared at, and was abruptly overcome with a sudden sinking feeling. (Brian was watching the whole ordeal with great entertainment). Slowly Envy turned his head to see the small blonde staring at him with his large, golden eyes, smiling broadly. With a reluctant sigh, Envy grabbed Ed's wallet, and started out the door.

"Be right back, Edo," Envy called (sounding only _slightly_ exasperated), before flashing a smile at Ed, who was grinning triumphantly.

When the door had clicked securely shut, and the sound of Envy's footsteps had disappeared, Brian dragged his own chair over, stationing himself in front of Ed.

Ed flushed slightly when he realized Brian was studying the bump on his abdomen intently.

"A-ah… Umm, sooo… what else is there that I need to know about at this stage of my… my pregnancy?" Ed asked awkwardly. The way Ed said it, it sounded to Brian as if the teen was still was getting over the fact that it had been possible for him to get pregnant at all.

'_Well, he _does _have reason to…_' The doctor smiled at Ed reassuringly.

"Hmm… I think you two have basically gotten everything under control for now, but in the near future, we're going to have to start talking about where and how we're going to deliver the baby…" Once Brian had asked Ed if he knew what a cesarean section was (Ed responded with a blush and a hesitant nod, mumbling something about not being well-acquainted with the subject), Brian found himself rambling on and on about the procedure (in excruciating detail, no less).

"--And because the rate of survival for both the mother and child has increased _so_ dramatically over the years, the procedure is being used more frequently all over. It's a good thing we have access the knowledge here for _you_, Edward!" Brian said cheerfully.

"…Yeah. Great."

Surprised at the lack of enthusiasm, Brian looked directly at Ed. Green-blue eyes met gold ones, and for the first time Brian was amazed to find he was able to read them so clearly. Ed was _mortified_ at the topic of the conversation. Brian inwardly kicked himself for not noticing Ed's discomfort sooner.

"Ed, you _do_ know it's crucial for us to discuss the actual delivery process, don't you?" Brian questioned gently. Ed hesitated before nodding slightly.

"So. Do you have anyone other than Envy to support you after the baby is born?" Brian inquired. A dark expression crossed Ed's face briefly before it was replaced with a more thoughtful one.

"I have my brother, Alphonse… and the Rockbell's, who supported us when we were younger," Ed thought out loud. Brian frowned slightly.

"They 'supported' you?" Brian echoed. Ed nodded in the slightest.

"But… what about your parents?" Brian asked as gently as he could. He observed Ed's fists clenching tightly in his lap.

"Our… our mother…" Ed paused and closed his eyes, a slightly pained look taking residence on his face. It looked to Brian as though he was reflecting upon painful memories he tried so hard to keep repressed. He was right.

"Edward, every thing you tell me is kept confidential; you know that," Brian said soothingly. Another silence overtook the room; Ed's head was bowed so that his bangs covered his eyes.

Finally, Ed spoke up again, not bothering to lift his head.

"Our mom died when Al was eight and I was nine," Ed mumbled. Brian's mouth dropped slightly open; he'd heard long ago that the Elric brothers had a tragic history, but he had no idea of how terrible it was. He waited for the golden chibi to continue.

Brian was surprised to see a bitter smile appear on his lips.

"And our father? He left mom long ago, when I was still a baby, and right after Al was born. _When mom needed him the **fucking** most._" Ed spat, his mood changing for the worse. Brian's eyes were slightly wide, but he did nothing to stop the blonde from his rant. He figured it'd be best to let the blonde let out this frustration that had obviously been pent up for far too long.

"We don't even fucking know if he's alive or dead," Ed was nearly screaming, and was clenching his fists so tightly in his anger that his knuckles were white.

Brian had a sudden recollection of his first meeting with Ed.

"_Mr. Elric--"_

"_Could ya please just call me "Ed?" It reminds me of someone…"_

Ed stood up; his whole body was tense. He finally lifted his head, and Brian's heart sank when he saw the spiteful, pained look on Ed's face.

"Even if he _is_ alive, I would _never_ ask him for his fucking help. If he couldn't help Mom, there can't be any fucking way he'd help his _son_ or remaining family. And I don't _want_ his fucking help…" Ed's anger was slowly relenting; he was breathing hard, and his voice was lowering.

Eventually, he plopped back down in his seat, and rubbed his face tiredly with a hand; all previous anger suddenly vanishing.

"…I'm really sorry… I don't really know what came over me," Ed said, looking away in embarrassment. Brian waved it away with a hand.

"It's quite alright, Ed. You can't keep on bottling up the way you feel about something, or else you'll eventually just crack like you did now. And taking the fact that you're pregnant and have mood swings-- that too plays a large role in emotional breakdowns." Brian explained calmly. Ed nodded sheepishly.

"'Kay," Ed said shyly, acting now more than ever the teenager he was.

"Ah… Hey, Ed?" Brian struggled to think of a way to change the topic to one Ed would be more comfortable with. Ed made a soft noise, indicating he was listening. An idea suddenly sprung to mind, and Brian smiled widely.

"Would you like me to find out the time where the baby is going to be due?" Brian asked casually, his eyes sparkling. Ed's eyes widened, and he was drawn from his previous funk.

"Really? You can do that?" He asked, his interest obvious by the way he spoke. Brian laughed at Ed's open excitement.

"Yes, I can."

"Then whadya keeping us waiting for?" Another voice asked, joining the conversation unexpectedly, and both Ed and Brian looked to the door in surprise.

Envy grinned at them from the doorway before chucking a large chocolate bar at Ed. Ed caught it with ease and eagerly tore into it, biting a chuck of it and smiling somewhat dreamily. Envy chuckled lightly as he walked over to the two others in the room.

"Alright. Let me just check your file," Brian mumbled, already leafing through the papers from the folder that was on his desk. His eyes quickly scanned over the information, and he let out a victorious "Hah!" as he located the paper he needed. There was silence in the room as Brian quickly wrote down some numbers, his lips moving as he calculated.

Finally, Brian looked up with a smile.

"According to my calculations," Brian said playfully, adding a "dramatic" pause. Both Envy and Ed waited intently, though Ed sat with baited breath, his chocolate forgotten in his lap.

"The baby should be born in October, right around the middle of the month, maybe a little bit earlier…" Brian muttered to himself while he copied down a few more figures. At last he circled something he'd written on the paper, making an affirmative noise as he lowered his hand holding the clipboard to his side in finality.

Brian raised his eyes to his apprehensive patient and his partner.

"It looks like the baby is due to be born on October twelfth," Brian said with a smile. Ed and Envy exchanged pleased glances.

"Well, we've gotta start headin' back home… Ed's gotta get back and rest; he's got work everyday this week," Envy explained, getting up to leave, Ed already at the door, working on devouring his chocolate again.

"Wait, Edward, I have some things for you," Brian said. Ed came over, and was handed two pieces of paper. One was a sheet with a little bit of text on it, with Brian's signature on the bottom right-hand corner. The other was little more than a slip of paper that had his name on the top; below it appeared to be the name of some sort of medication on it. Brian's signature was present on this one as well.

Ed stared blankly at the two papers, his mouth still full of chocolate. Eventually he looked up, swallowed, and raised a questioning eyebrow at Brian.

"What's this?" He asked, pointing to the larger sheet.

"That's an excuse from work. On it, I explain how you need to miss work due to pneumonia, and you need to stay home to recover. It would not be a wise idea to spread the word that you're pregnant; if it gets out, you'll probably be taken away to be experimented on," Brian said warily.

"So use it when you don't want to go out in public any more because you're showing, and can't go into work, lest you gather suspicious of your condition. And those official papers from me should be a sufficient excuse for higher ups" Ed responded with a thankful smile sent toward the young doctor.

"And this?" Ed now pointed to the slip. Brian grinned, and gestured to the door.

"Bring that to the prescriptions counter and the nurse there will give you a bottle of pills for morning sickness," Brian said with a wink. Ed looked back down at the paper with a new respect, and dashed out the door to get the "blessed" medication.

XxXxXxXxXx

"Envy! You ready?" Ed called, tossing the crumpled chocolate wrapper into a trashcan stationed by the door before he opened the door to Brian's office and stepped inside. While Envy finished up some conversation with Brian, Ed could have _sworn_ the young doctor handed something inconspicuously to the green-haired Homunculus, who in turn stuck said thing into their bag. Ed let the feeling go, however, as Envy walked toward him, slipping an arm around his waist before they made their way back out of the door together. Ed turned his head quickly and waved back at Brian. Envy didn't turn around at all, but made some sort of motion over his shoulder with his hand, which Brian took to be a wave in its own, strange way.

"Goodbye!" Brian called after them. There was a muffled response, before the footsteps faded away completely. Brian sat down with a content sigh.

'_I hope everything works out for those boys…'_ Brian thought, in a good mood after having seen his most interesting patient.

A small smile played on Brian's lips as his thoughts changed focus from the temperamental chibi to the father of the baby.

'_And Envy better take that gift seriously.'_

XxXxXxXxXx

"Hey, Envy," a sleepy voice greeted, accompanied with the sounds of a door opening and then closing just a few seconds later. Violet eyes moved up, and Envy peered over the book he was reading as he expected his chibi to walk into the room. Sure enough, Ed stumbled in, and plopped down next to him. Envy noticed with a well-hidden smile that the blonde was wearing only his boxers and a huge shirt that nearly came down to his knees (it was especially large on Ed, due to his lack of height). His golden hair was let down from its usual braid, but was kept back in a messy, carelessly made ponytail. Envy couldn't picture anything that could possibly be cuter.

"Hey, Chibi, didn't you head in for the night?" Envy asked as he greeted him with a feather-light kiss on the lips before pulling back to look at the tired teen. Ed nodded, but remained on the couch, rubbing his eyes wearily with his fists.

"Its late-- you should be in bed," Envy said. Ed shrugged.

"Yeah, but I missed you. I like going to bed _with_ you," Ed yawned, stretching his arms over his head. Envy merely sent a small smirk and a nod toward him before he resumed his thorough reading.

Slowly beginning to wake up, Ed watched Envy's eyes quickly scan the pages, before eagerly flipping the second page to read the next two. He was nearly halfway through the considerably large volume. Ed could tell by the way Envy was sitting straight up and unmoving that the Homunculus was thoroughly intrigued by what he was reading; a state in which you rarely saw him when it came to books (or anything other than Ed himself, for that matter). However, the cover had been removed, and Ed could not recognize the book.

"What're ya readin'?" Ed asked curiously, leaning over to try to read some of the content. Envy, seeming to have forgotten Ed was sitting right there next to him in the few minutes he'd dove back into the text, hurriedly scooted away and uncharacteristically held the book protectively against his chest.

Envy could feel heat quickly rising to his face, and he inwardly cursed.

"N-nothing special," Envy muttered, turning his head away in a poor attempt to hide his blush.

Ed raised an eyebrow incredulously. This was a rare sight; was Envy actually _blushing?_

"You _are _aware that now I _really_ have to know, right?" Ed teased. Envy tried to glare at the chibi, but it came out as a pout.

"What; I'm not allowed to read in _private _now? What the fuck else am I _supposed_ to do now that you're back at work and I've got nothing else to do?" Envy grumbled. Ed rolled his eyes.

"It wouldn't be as much of a problem, if you would actually give yourself permission to get out of the house sometimes. C'mon; you can't possibly think that _all_ humans are bad, _I'm_ a human_,"_ Ed pointed out unnecessarily. Envy shrugged airily.

"But that's because you're my chibi," Envy smirked. "You've _always_ been my chibi." Ed blushed slightly.

"…Well… I _still_ wanna know what book that is," Ed said, trying to change the topic.

"…And if its porn, I'm personally gonna _castrate_ ya," Ed added as a threatening afterthought. On that dark note, Envy grinned.

"You're not getting this without a--" And that was all Envy found himself capable of saying, before Ed launched himself at the startled shape shifter. Ed pressed his lips against Envy's in a heated kiss, and forced his tongue through Envy's lips. Envy moaned into Ed's mouth, smirking to himself as he felt the sound caused shivers to race down Ed's spine.

Suddenly, Envy found his book being easily plucked out of his grasp, and Ed's warmth was suddenly withdrawn. Envy blinked dumbly, before his brain processed that Ed was now sitting calmly beside him, scanning the first page of the book. His eyes widened, and he flipped back to the table of contents.

After reading the names of the chapters, he lifted his gaze to Envy, who, at the sudden eye contact, blushed furiously. A smile twitched on the corners of Ed's lips, and the alchemist flipped back another page to read the title off the book on the inside. Finally, Ed closed the book, glancing down at it with interest before looking back up.

"So… do ya think you'd mind telling me exactly when you started reading _'The First Steps of_ _Parenthood__'_, Envy?" Ed asked in a slightly playful tone, a little smile plastered onto his lips. Envy frowned before hurriedly getting up to leave. A smaller hand caught his wrist, however, and he was forced to look back at his small blonde.

"What… I'm gonna be one soon… why not read about it?" Envy muttered, knowing he'd been caught red-handed with a baby book, and would only be teased if he denied it.

"And… and Brian gave it to me," he continued, eyes cast down to the floor. It appeared as though he was suddenly intrigued by the design on the carpet.

"He said it would be good for me to read, and would be helpful to _you_…" Envy glared daggers at the book that was causing him such embarrassment. Why, oh _why,_ had he actually trusted a human other than Ed? …Okay, maybe it had to do with the fact that _this _human was responsible for taking care of his blonde and their baby, but _still…_ he'd always _known _hanging around humans was trouble. Envy wished nothing more at the moment than to be Somewhere Else.

So you can imagine how shocked (though undeniably relieved) he was when, out of the blue, he was forced back down onto the couch and pulled into a warm embrace.

"Thank you, Envy," Ed murmured, before gently pressing a kiss against the side of the Homunculus's neck.

"…For what?" Envy asked, completely lost at this point. Ed just shook his head and smiled happily.

"Just thanks. Thanks for giving your all to make this work. Thanks for taking care of the baby and me. And thanks for giving this kid a chance," Ed murmured, blushing a little at his own words.

Envy, now decidedly pleased at this unexpected reaction, wrapped an arm around Ed. He held Ed's face in his other hand and tilted the blonde's head up, licking gently at Ed's lips and then immediately allowed entry. After a few minutes, Ed suddenly pulled away. Envy looked at him, obviously irritated the kiss had ended so abruptly.

"Edo, what--" Ed placed a finger over Envy's lips, smirking slightly.

"Just be quiet for a minute, Envy," Ed said, pressing up against Envy, practically purring. For the first time, Envy took notice of Ed's lustful expression.

"Now… we _both_ know that if we keep this up, I'm gonna end up uke. I don't really wanna chance hurting the baby, and… you're always giving _me_ special attention…" Ed trailed off, his hands gliding gently down Envy's arms. Ed's eyes glinted mischievously, satisfied that he held all of Envy's attention; as if Envy's wide eyes that were constantly glued to his face wasn't clue enough.

"But I _know_ you love being seme… And _I_ have a solution," Ed whispered into Envy's ear seductively.

For a moment Envy was rendered speechless. As always, he was astounded by the spontaneous mood swing, and only one thought registered coherently in his head.

'_I fucking _love_ mood swings.'_

Envy smirked broadly upon catching Ed's drift, and only had one thing left to say…

"Bring it on, Fullmetal," Envy growled playfully, pulling the blonde into a heated kiss.

**XoX**

Ed immediately slipped his tongue between Envy's lips on contact, surprising the Homunculus. Ed clutched Envy's shirt in tight fists, gradually pulling the tight fabric over his head and letting it fall by the couch. Envy's skort and Ed's shirt and pants joined it quickly, creating a small heap on the floor.

Envy closed his eyes, and sighed deeply at the sensation of Ed's lips brushing lightly against the front of his neck. Ed smiled against Envy's pale skin when he managed to extract a small hiss of mixed pain and pleasure from the body beneath him by biting down precisely where his neck and shoulder connected. He compensated by kissing and licking the bite profusely.

"Mmm… glad to see you haven't lost it yet, Edo," Envy said on a sigh, tilting his head back to allow Ed better access to his neck. Ed responded to the statement by dragging his lips down his throat and licking his way down to Envy's navel, pausing to dip his tongue in and out. Envy shuddered in pleasure, and decided it was about time to spook the blonde.

Ed gasped when Envy randomly bucked his hips upward suggestively. Ed felt his face burn crimson, and looked away upon hearing his wild-haired lover chuckle at his antics as he commented on how cute and still very innocent he was.

Envy's breath caught suddenly in his throat, and he nearly choked on it as a hot mouth shamelessly took him in for a mere second, making Envy hiss with the sudden contact he'd been sorely missing for so long.

Envy looked down through lust-clouded eyes to see Ed's smug-looking golden orbs staring right back at his half-lidded violet ones. Ed would never say it, but as he saw Envy in this position (a.k.a panting, sweating, and moaning) he was pretty sure he knew why Envy got so impatient so quickly.

Ed slowly licked up Envy's legnth, taking him unexpectedly into his mouth halfway. Envy futilely tried to stifle a moan, and blindly reached for something to hold, and ended up tightly gripping Ed's left shoulder with one hand and some golden hair with the other.

"Chibi," Ed groaned, desperately bucking his hips and forcing Ed take him fully into his mouth. Ed chuckled softly, feeling Envy tense as the vibrations from his laughter hit home.

"E-_Edo_," Envy managed to get out between clenched teeth.

"Ye_-es?_" Ed asked sweetly, stretching out the word as much as he could. Envy squeezed his eyes shut, determined to not let a single betraying noise slip through his lips. Envy's eyes opened, and he sent a glare at the chibi. However, the glare turned into a smirk. He knew _exactly_ what Ed wanted him to say.

"Fuck me already," Envy purred. Ed's eyes widened, and he fought back a blush; only Envy could put words so embarrassingly blandly with ease.

"Close your eyes," Ed ordered.

"Yes, _Master,_" Envy said huskily, closing his eyes obediently.

At first Envy felt nothing but disappointment as Ed lost contact with his shaft entirely. But then Envy's eyes snapped open and he openly groaned out a soft, disbelieving, "Oh, you're _shitting_ me. Edo," as a sudden warmth enveloped him. His mind nearly shut down right there and then.

Envy propped himself up on his elbows before he grasped Ed's waist securely, supporting the younger boy as Ed tried to adjust to the sudden intrusion he'd put upon himself, holding back a few choked sobs and regaining his breath.

Ed's eyes were shut tightly, and he panted harshly, small whimpers escaping his lips every now and then. Envy stayed as still as he could, trying to not cause the teen on top of him any more pain than he was already experiencing.

Ed's pained eyes eventually opened, and lowered to meet Envy's pleasured, but undoubtedly concerned ones.

"Go on, Edo," Envy whispered. A determined look replaced the pained one almost entirely, and with a soft grunt, Ed raised himself from Envy almost completely, before sliding back down. Envy's head fell back onto his shoulders and he moaned loudly. Encouraged by the reaction, Ed started a slow rhythm, rising and falling back down with increasing force.

Ed shifted slightly before ramming himself down on Envy again while beneath him, Envy arched up into him. Ed let out a cry that was accompanied with some harsh shudders as he obviously found that special spot Envy always managed to hit.

"Envy," Ed whispered breathlessly, his head having fallen back on his shoulders.

"I can't hear you, Ed," Envy moaned as Ed threw himself back down onto him with even more force.

"A-ah… Envy…" Ed whimpered desperately, eyes closing as he brushed against the spot that sent jolts of pleasure racing up his spine.

"_Scream_ my name, Chibi," Envy hissed, one hand leaving Ed's waist to grab his member tightly. Ed's eyes opened wide before they closed halfway.

"Envy…" Ed moaned softly, just barely brushing against that spot again.

"Louder."

_"Envy!"_

_"Louder!"_

Ed slammed down onto Envy again, this time hitting the spot dead on, and with all the force he could muster.

"_ENVY!"_ Ed screamed as he climaxed and came into Envy's hand, Envy coming right after him, sighing his name. For the first few seconds, Ed slumped forward, panting hard. Gathering all the strength he had left, Ed weakly pushed himself up off of Envy, and collapsed next to him on the couch, the two basking together in the afterglow, Envy lazily licking his hand clean before he toyed with Ed's sweat-slicked blonde hair.

**XoX**

As usual, Envy's hands eventually found their way to Ed's rounded stomach, and gently rubbed it.

"I don't think… we're going to be… doing any of that… again… any time soon," Ed murmured between his gasps for air. Envy sighed, but nodded his assent.

"Nope. Not with you in your current condition…

"Yeah…" (Yawn)

A pause.

"Ne… Edo… Isn't it about time you went back to bed? You've got a whole week of work ahead of you, starting tomorrow, and you've _gotta_ be tired after that."

"…Fuck, its Monday tomorrow? …Do I _have_ to go to work?" Ed whined. Envy simply blinked, staring right back at him.

"Uhh…yeah, you do."

Another pause, eventually broken with a sigh.

"…Damn." Envy got up with a small smirk sent Ed's way and, with a little more difficulty than he normally would have, lifted the blonde chibi into his arms. Ed wrapped his arms around Envy's neck and rested his head on his shoulder.

Once in their bedroom, Envy gingerly lay Ed down on their bed. He walked around to his side and clicked off the bedside lamp before joining him there. He pulled merely the sheet over both of their bodies. Immediately, Ed cuddled up against the Homunculus as best he could, and rested his head in the crook of Envy's neck while Envy wrapped an arm loosely around his smaller body. Again, Envy wondered how Ed fit against his body so _perfectly_.

Envy voiced his thoughts, and was rewarded with a small chuckle and a loving "good-night kiss."

The two fell asleep not long after that, Envy thinking about his little blonde, and Ed wondering briefly about how he was going to keep his little secret from spreading at work before his thoughts turned to a happier subject; the green-haired Sin laying against him.

And all was peaceful.

…For the moment…

…The exact opposite of the frantic week to come.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: Yup! I _finally_ got to write a lemon! Yaaay! _And_ fluff… yeah, I know, it kinda turned fluffy at the end, but I love fluff, so deal! **Yawns** I'm sorry if any of it was sucky… I kept going back over it, and its 1:30 in the morning… and I woke up reaaally early this morning. I worked so late so that I could post this chappie before I went away for a month.

Joh: Good for you, Sis! I'm so proud of you!

Jessie: **Smiles** S'aank you, Twiny! Aishiteru! **Kisses**

Joh: **Giggles** Shaw!

Jessie: To the readers: thank you all for being sooo patient as I worked on this chapter! Hope it was long enough. I've been _incredibly_ busy. I'm glad so many of you seem to be really enjoying it! Ed's got only four more months to go in his pregnancy, and doesn't know how much longer he's gonna be able to keep it a secret from more than the three people that already know at work! Don't forget, there's a mischievous _Hughes_in the picture! **Winks** And that seemed to be the last time the two could still screw each other with a pregnant Ed! Poor guys… They're gonna be so sex deprived… And what kind of Envy do you get without regular sex? …An extremely horny one, o' course! **Practically dies laughing **Half-baked brownies to all reviewers! Thank you for all of your ideas and support!

Kakashisninjadogs: **Bows** Thank you, thank you. I try! A girl? Maaaaybe, maaaaybe not! You'll find out later!

EnvyGreedEdFreak1993: Twins? Sure it's a possibility, but all will become clear in due time… Keep on reading!

Kaoru Gal: I love you, baby! You're da best Imouto! **Huggles and kisses**

DragonBlade65: Edo's _always_ cute… even when he's having a temper tantrum.. tsk, tsk… Edo, you're such a baby, and you're already having one! I love Ed sooo much! **Starry eyed**

Light-Hideko: Dun dun duuun! Ooh, good point! You'll see what happens later!

darkangel36: Thanks for da comment. Hope this chapter was good enough, as well! Ah… Mustang finds out you can't plan life to go exactly as you think it should!

Firehedgehog: I do… and here ya go! I'm continuing!

Ai Rena Baka: **Joins you in laughing on the floor**

7sins7lies: **Happy** Totally happy you're loving it! Ahh… I try, I try!

kousagibriefs: Thankies!

SoulfulZen: Poor Mustang… but it was probably worth _anything_ to see his face!

Forever Yours Zana: And I can't wait to write their reactions, either! They will be to come in future chappies, be patient! **Grin**

angel61991: I updated! I tried to do it reasonably soon, too…

Otaku no Kochou: Glad ya like it so much already! Hope ya continue to like it as much as you do now!

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: I think I'll actually _draw_ his reaction/expression **Strikes a pose with a pencil**

loathed wolf spirit: I know! I love that memoriam thing! My favorite had gotta be da Hughes one! You have _no_ idea how relieved I am to hear that you think Ed's in character; I'm trying sooo hard, and its even more challenging because he has mood swings and other side effects of pregnancy making him psycho! And thank you for agreeing… but it's so true. Envy really did need a break! That's for the review!

Me And My God Complex: You bet he is! Ed. Feminine. **Giggle**

DEATHxBYxPAPERCUTS: EnvyxEd forever, baby! **Shudders at thought of being yelled at by Ed** Poor Mustang… **Tries to stifle laughter but fails and ends up laughing hysterically**

razatip: Yup, Mustang totally deserved being scarred for life! Silly Roy, don't make fun of Ed; something bad will always come from it!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Blushes** I feel sooo loved! **Huggles** Glad you love my ficcy so much! **Hands a carton of chocolate chip ice cream and a spoon **Pss… the spoon is chocolate, too!

aruslym: Hey, did you train the aliens to give you cheese when you run around the maze and find the little bell and ring it? Thanks for the review!

MiStraLL: Yes, yes… We all know Ed hates crying, and here he even cries in front of _Mustang!_ The poor midget… Hope ya enjoyed the latest update

envy's flame: I know Envy wasn't in the last chappie, but I tried to make up for it here! **Grins** Go Hughes!

Fishtank the Stephs: Yup. I can _never_ get enough of Ed's outbursts! **Rolls around on the floor laughing at thought of the episode where Ed nearly calls himself 'small' while in the vent of Laboratory 5!**

Tisska01: **Nods happily** I thought the reaction was worth it, too! Heh, I looove Maes Hughes! He's like, one of my favie characters of all time! **Hands you Hughes action figure ('Now with 'showing-pictures-of-Elysia-action!')**

shu-chan77901: **Starry eyed** I know, right? Babies are _adorable!_ Oh, and as for your question of the gender… well, that's an answer for a later time! **Wink**

(Thanks for all your dedicated commenting and reviewing. I tried to write an especially long chappie because sadly, this is the last chapter I'm gonna be able to post for a while. I'm not going to be active on because I'm going away for a month. Thank you for your patience, and don't worry, at this point I'm _never_ going to discontinue this fic; not for the _world!_ It's waaay too much fun! Thank you for the support, and I can't wait to get back to you guys! I'm gonna miss you all sooo much! Have a great summer! Toodles!)


	8. Secret's Out

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist.

Jessie: And that's all there is to it.

Joh: **Nods** Shaw.

Jessie: Everyone, please, please forgive me for taking so dang long to update! I almost lost the part of the chappie that I'd written on paper, and then I found it again!

Joh: Wheee! Good for you, Nee-san!

Jessie: So I've been writing it up all day, and suddenly the plot bunny came, and I wrote and wrote and wrote and… well, you get the point! **Sighs happily** I love the plot bunny!

Joh: **Huggles Jessie **Yaaay!

Jessie: **Huggles back** Hope ya'll enjoy!

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The door to the Colonel's office opened, only to reveal a cross, exhausted Edward. The teen proceeded to stomp into the room noisily. Hawkeye, currently sitting at the desk, didn't bother to look up, knowing all too well just who her new companion was.

"Good morning to you as well, Edward," she said calmly as she neatly shuffled some documents. She placed the papers aside and raised her hand in a casual salute. Ed reluctantly returned the gesture before crossing his arms.

"There's nothin' good 'bout it," he grumbled. Hawkeye paused while she thought about his words.

"What about the fact that you're not experiencing any morning sickness?" Hawkeye finally answered. Ed's expression actually brightened at her observation.

"Yeah, I guess. I got some medication for it," he said. Sensing his mood was lifting as she named the positives, Hawkeye continued.

"And what else is there… oh, I have some news that I think you'll enjoy. Today, everyone's workload is unusually light; you'll have about half the amount of paperwork you would normally."

A small smile graced Ed's face… before turning into a grimace, for the Colonel chose that moment to walk in.

Ed glared. Roy frowned, but he didn't dare say anything, as their latest encounter flashed back in his head. It had ultimately ended with his head completely covered in milk while Ed stalked off in a hug from the cafeteria.

And Hughes _still_ wouldn't stop shoving the picture he'd taken of him –just sitting there in shock, staring dumbly into the camera– in his face at random intervals, and laughing like it was the funniest thing he'd seen in a long time (which, now that Roy thought about it, probably was).

Roy glanced behind the blonde and caught the warning look Hawkeye was sending him. In that simple glance, Roy knew that if he said or did anything to upset the chibi in the very least, he would be fearing for his life.

"See ya _later_, Colonel bastard," Ed spat before walking out of the room, making sure to slam the door violently behind him. Roy flinched slightly when he heard the sound of something in his office crashing to the floor and breaking accompanying the slam.

Roy sighed grievously as he sat down at his desk. He raked his fingers through his dark hair. Hawkeye unceremoniously dropped a stack of paperwork in front of the man.

He lifter his face to meet Hawkeye's thin smile. "Just think, Colonel Mustang only _four_ _more_ _months_ of this."

Roy let his head fall and hit his desk, and let a small groan escape from his lips.

XxXxXxXxXx

Ed briskly walked over to an empty table in the cafeteria, taking a seat and slumping over, a bottle of milk in each hand. The blonde let out a sigh of contentment, feeling pleased that he'd finished his paperwork early than he'd expected. He let his chin rest on the table, and closed his eyes.

Only a few minutes later, a shadow fell over him. Someone took a seat beside him, and Ed opened an eye, looking out from the corner to see Master Sergeant Fuery smiling timidly at him. He pushed his glasses back before he lifted a hand in a salute, and Ed briefly let go of the bottle to lazily raise two fingers to his head. His hand quickly went back to the milk.

"Hello, Edward… I just saw you sitting alone, and…uh, decided to sit with you. Is that okay?" Fuery asked quietly. Ed smiled at him and made a gesture for him to stay. Fuery let out a small breath of relief at being accepted and his smile broadened.

"Hey, Chief," Second Lieutenant Havoc greeted cheerfully. Blue eyes eyed the bottle of milk in Ed's possession curiously.

"Oi… aren't you infamous for hating milk with a passion? What happened; you finally became so desperate enough to get taller?" Havoc teased playfully. Ed gave him a look that specifically read, "continue this conversation and prepare to die." Havoc grinned at him and, with a shrug, plopped down on the side of Ed that wasn't already occupied.

Havoc suddenly seemed to notice the quiet Fuery, and he reached across Ed to tap him on the shoulder. Fuery gave a slight start before shyly looking over at the older blonde.

"How're ya doing, Fuery?" Havoc asked jovially, only just remembering a casual salute. Fuery returned the action before looking away. Havoc completely missed the slight blush rising to the raven-haired male's face, accompanied by a little, happy smile.

The three concentrated on their meals for a while (or milk, in Ed's case), in a companionable silence before it was abruptly interrupted.

"Why, _hello, _Ed!" A different voice chirped. Ed flinched at recognition of the voice, but forced himself to raise his eyes to Hughes' tall, grinning figure. The man had that mischievous glint in his eye that –right now– Ed really, _really_ hated.

Ed stared coolly back, and smiled (though it was a slightly nervously one).

"G'morning, Lieutenant Colonel Hughes," Ed greet, a false, cheerful, sarcastic tone heavy in his voice. Hughes raised an eyebrow in amusement, and at once Ed mentally slapped himself. _'Of _course_ the family-obsessed idiot would take that as a fucking challenge!'_ he berated himself heatedly.

Hughes sat himself on the seat opposing Ed, lazily resting his chin on his hands.

"Sooo…" he drawled.

"Remind me – what month is it, Edward?"

"…It's _July,_ Hughes," Ed said slowly. Hughes nodded, and smiled in a sheepish manner.

"Right; sorry about that. And- ah, what month will it be in four months from now?" Havoc and Fuery just glanced at Hughes curiously, while Ed's golden eyes widened in horror – no, he couldn't _possibly_ be going where he thought he was. Hughes wouldn't – _couldn't_ – be serious; he couldn't do this to him. Right? He was just joking around; of _course_ he wasn't just joking. …Right…?

"…It will be _October_, Hughes," he replied, his eyes daring Hughes to continue. Hughes coolly ignored the glare, and eyed Ed's outfit.

"It's a bit _hot_ to be wearing such baggy, heavy clothes, don't you think? I mean, aren't you hot in that huge _sweatshirt?_ Are you sick or something; I hope you're not cold in this _hot_ weather," Hughes asked playfully. The two sitting beside the more-than-slightly-flustered Edward tuned back into the conversation at Hughes' observation. "Yeah, Chief, aren't you hot?" Havoc asked, Fuery nodding at the sensible question.

"A-ah, no, I'm fine,' Ed lied; it actually _was_ hot… he'd previously been succeeding in blocking anything temperature related from his mind, but… _damnit_, it _was_ really hot!

Ed glanced at Hughes, only to see him staring in a way that perfectly said, "_Tell them. **Now**."_ Ed shot back an, "Are you fucking _crazy!"_ look. Hughes subtly mouthed something, looking disappointed. Ed frowned and shrugged. Hughes rolled his eyes, and this time Ed could read what Hughes was saying – 'they're your closest friends; you can trust them. You know they'll only want to help.' Ed bit his lip and looked away from Hughes' piercing lime-green eyes.

A few minutes later, Ed suddenly sighed, rolling his eyes and mumbling a soft, "Fine…"

"What was that, Edward?" Fuery asked, looking up from his tray in a questioning manner; the golden-eyed boy had Havoc's attention as well. Ed smiled sheepishly at them.

"Uh…there's something I've kinda been keeping from… well, basically _everyone,"_ Ed started.

"See? I _told _you something was up!" Havoc suddenly exclaimed as he turned to Fuery. The young Sergeant stared as Ed with a renewed curiosity, nodding in acknowledgement of Havoc's observation.

"So, what's up, Alchemy-boy?" Havoc asked with a slight smile.

"Ah, actually… it has a _lot_ to do with just that- alchemy," Ed replied quietly.

Fuery suddenly gasped, and leapt to his feet, bringing his friends' attention to himself.

"Edward, you didn't fail you annual exam, did you?" Fuery cried out, horrified. Ed immediately shook his head.

"No! No, its not _that_," Ed chuckled, smiling reassuringly at the now-blushing Fuery.

Hughes snuck a quick glance at Ed while the blonde was watching Havoc, chortling and patting Fuery heartily on the back. It wasn't that hard to see the wistful expression Ed was trying to hide. _'"If only it were that simple…" …I'll bet almost _anything_ that that's the thought running through his head right now,'_ Hughes found himself thinking. The expression Ed was wearing now fit those words perfectly, in any case.

"Remember that old experiment I attempted-- what, around six months ago?" Ed began.

"_What_- the one that you angst-ed about failing for _weeks_ after? No I don't quite recall having my nose nearly _broken_ by a certain (_angst-y) _teenage prodigy bursting out angrily through the Colonel's office door," Havoc said sarcastically.

Ed flushed slightly at the memory. Seeing Ed's reaction, Fuery chuckled quietly; Hughes snorted loudly with laughter.

"Nah, I'm totally over that, Ed. Go on," Havoc grinned. Ed sent him a dirty look; he'd really thought Havoc was pissed off just then.

"Well, about three months ago, I… uh, discovered that it wasn't exactly a failure--"

"_--What? _So my poor nose nearly got broken for nothing?" Havoc exclaimed indignantly. Ed burst out laughing at the older blonde's expression, but managed to stop before he lost Havoc's attention completely; after all, Havoc wasn't known for a greet attention span, more of the opposite, truth be told.

"Anyway," Fuery prodded gently.

"Yeah… it was a success, it just didn't work quite the way I thought it would," Ed explained. Three sets of eyes rested on him- two curious, one expectant. There was a brief silence.

"…So, how'd it work?" Havoc asked, ever the impatient one.

"Well, I went to the doctor, and I found out, I…" Ed trailed off, looking increasingly uncomfortable.

Hughes got up, seeing the blonde's unease, and walked around the table. He patted Ed on the head, and Ed 's eyes met smiling, lime-green ones. He instantly felt calmer.

"…I'm…pregnant" Ed finished with a small smile.

There was silence.

Havoc's eyes widened, and his ever-present cigarette fell from his lips. Fuery… well, the poor guy couldn't say anything, as he'd fainted on the spot. Hughes had (_somehow_) anticipated the reaction, and caught his from behind. He pushed him forward, so the sergeant rested against the table.

Ed, meanwhile, was desperately refraining from laughing at Havoc's dumbstruck expression. Hughes was busy grinding out Havoc's lit cigarette into the ground,

"…You're serious?" Havoc finally managed to ask shakily. Ed nodded, repressing a smile that was now boarding on a grin. Havoc reached for another cigarette, and smiled weakly at Ed.

"Um…c-congratulations, I guess," Havoc shook his head, as if he was trying to clear it of water.

"I mean…aw, hell," Havoc sighed, the color gradually returning to his extraordinarily pale face. He even managed a genuine "Havoc" smile.

"That's great! You actually performed a successful Human Transmutation! Isn't that something no one's been able to do before?" Havoc asked, impressed. Ed nodded. Havoc clapped him on the back.

"That's amazing, Ed," Havoc started, although an extremely curious expression had started to take over his features.

"But who-" he was interrupted by a sudden grating noise- the sound of many benches being pushed back, followed by numerous sets of footsteps. Havoc looked forlornly at the many members of the military returning to their posts.

"Ah… I guess I'll be seeing ya later, Ed," Havoc sighed, barley raining his hand in a salute (returned in the same manner by Ed), before running off toward the doors. He skidded to a stop halfway there, however, and turned around to come back to the table Ed and Hughes still sat at.

The tall blonde grabbed the forgotten Fuery around the waist, slinging him over his shoulder, and ran off just a fast as he had before. It seemed as if the younger man was as light as a feather.

The sound of many footsteps eventually disappeared completely, leaving the two friends who remained at the table in a companionable silence. Ed looked up at Hughes, only to see him lost in thought, staring into space.

Ed's heart sank, however, when he realized Havoc had just (unintentionally) raised the next big question he feared.

"Edward…" Hughes said slowly, looking at Ed, before his gaze lowered to the bump on Ed's abdomen he knew was there, just barely hidden by the sweatshirt.

Ed, desperate to get away before the fateful question was asked, grimaced suddenly.

"A-ah, I don't feel so good," Ed mumbled, a hand going to his stomach. Hughes' curious look turned to concern.

"What's wrong? Do you feel like you're gonna throw up?" Hughes asked gently, not realizing Ed knew of his raised suspicions. Ed got up, and started toward the exit, the Lieutenant Colonel right on his heels.

"Hughes, could ya tell Hawkeye I'll be right there? That I just went to the bathroom?" Ed asked. Hughes nodded, but paused a moment to look at Ed warmly. The man randomly reached over and ruffled Ed's golden hair fondly.

"Feel better," he said simply, before turning the direction of Roy's office. Ed made his way to the restroom, true to his word, and once he'd gotten inside, leaned against the wall.

He was relieved to find it was empty. His thoughts turned to the problem at hand. _'Of course they're gonna start to wonder who the father is… it's only _natural. _But…'_ Ed couldn't continue the though. He moved to the sinks, and looked at his reflection in the mirror above. His eyes lowered until he was starting directly at his stomach. You still couldn't tell he was pregnant… with the ridiculously huge sweatshirt.

But it was the only thing he had that still covered the large swell on this belly. Without it, the fact that he was carrying a child was obvious. _'And now not only three, but _five_ people here know…'_ Ed sighed, and leaned down to splash water on his face.

He looked up into the mirror again; his nervous reflection fazed back. _'How are they gonna react when they find out it's _Envy_?'_ Ed finally allowed himself to think. He visibly twitched, and, with a sigh, he ran a hand through his long bangs. He left the restroom and, reluctantly, made his way to the Colonel's office. The door was slightly ajar, and as the chibi neared it, the sounds of a heated argument made themselves known.

Ed paused when he heard his name, and decided to listen in to the conversation.

"…Can't pressure him at this time, Hughes. That's honestly the _last_ thing the boy needs right now!" Ed was both shocked and extremely nervous to hear even _Hawkeye_ was involved in the argument. She actually sounded exasperated (any emotion coming from the woman whatsoever was rare indeed).

"I only have concern for him as well, but we _really_ don't know _anything_ around the situation!" Hughes said, sounding as though he was trying to keep his voice low, but was having a difficult time controlling his anger.

"How can we support Edward if we don't even know how he became pregnant in the first place?" Hughes continued. "He said it was due to the transmutation," Hawkeye answered, though it sounded as if she was beginning to lose her resolve. Edward, though he felt mortified that the fight was on his behalf, continued to listen.

"But it was the transmutation that enabled Fullmetal to conceive, Lieutenant" Roy voice unexpectedly cut into the conversation, and Hawkeye fell silent. Ed's eyes widened slightly: _'How did he know…?'_

"…So, what you're saying is…" Hawkeye trailed off, finally seeing Hughes point. Ed could just picture Hughes nodding silently towards those shocked, amber eyes.

"I see your point," she admitted at last.

"You're wondering if he was raped, or if--"

"--Or if he already has a partner we don't know about," Roy cut in, sounding grave, if not utterly shocked at the prospect.

"But why on _earth_ would Edward not tell us if he had a partner?" Hawkeye insisted sounding slightly irritated.

"I trust in him more than that; I should hope you would, too, Hughes," Hawkeye said confidently. Ed felt a pang of guilt at her words, and bit his lip.

"That's just it," Hughes said, sounding much warmer than he had before.

"I trust Edward much more than that. And so that's why I'm so concerned; if Ed doesn't have a partner who supports him and was the one to impregnate him, then…"

"You think he was raped," Hawkeye concluded. A heavy silence filled the room, and the tension was worse than it was before for Ed, even though his friends had been arguing.

Waiting was driving the young alchemist insane –they were _still_ silent– and so eventually he pressed himself against the wall, turned his head and peeked into the opening. In the room, Roy sat behind his desk, staring down in contemplation. Hughes stood in front of the Colonel, while Hawkeye stood next to the Lieutenant Colonel; she had her hand to her mouth, obviously lost in thought.

"But that doesn't seem right, either," Hawkeye finally said.

"What do you mean?" Hughes asked, turning to stare at the woman.

"Edward isn't one to let someone take advantage of him so easily. He's much, _much_ smarter than that. What's more--" Hawkeye said, slightly louder when she saw Hughes open his mouth to retort.

"He couldn't _possibly_ have been picked up while he was drunk at some bar, Hughes," Hawkeye said dryly.

"He has made it _quite_ clear, in the past, that he is against underage drinking." Hughes' mouth snapped shut, and he managed a small, sheepish grin and a shrug. Edward felt a smile take residence on his lips despite the rising guilt filling his chest; Hawkeye put an awful lot of trust in him.

"So we're just back to square one, then," Roy voiced their shared thought.

"It seems like the most likely scenario is that Edward has a partner he isn't telling us about," Roy continued. Hawkeye's lips were pursed; she wasn't the least bit happy that the Colonel was questioning Ed's trust in them.

"But why would he do that? He should know we support _all_ of his choices," Hawkeye said quietly. Roy frowned, and sat back in his chair.

"Maybe he has a relationship with someone he knows he shouldn't have," Roy said, his voice betraying the suspicion he obviously felt. Ed flinched from where he stood; damn that Colonel and his tendency to take such educated (usually correct) guesses.

"Colonel!" Hawkeye exclaimed, anger underlying her words. Her hand twitched; she was obviously refraining from reaching for her trusted gun in its holster.

"What is it, Lieutenant? We have to consider all perspectives if we want to figure out this mystery without consulting Fullmetal himself: even the worst-case scenarios," Roy shrugged. Hawkeye looked like she wanted to retort, but knew his point was correct.

"Well, it looks like a mission is in order: we must keep a constant eye on Fullmetal, and keep our ears open to any rumors of his partner-"

"Why don't we just ask Alphonse?" Both Hawkeye and Roy turned their gazes to Hughes in surprise. He smiled mirthlessly.

"We know Edward can't keep anything from his brother; Alphonse would _surely_ have to know this kind of information, and--"

"Alright, alright. Sheeh, can't you guys just keep your fucking cool instead of turning absolutely fucking _everything_ into a mission? Just keep Alphonse _out_ of this." Everyone in the room gave a start, and looked to the door. There was Ed, leaning casually against the doorframe, arms crossed and, from his expression, very, _very_ pissed.

"E-Edward!" Hawkeye gasped. Her eyes narrowed.

"Were you eavesdropping? I would have expected _better_ of y--"

"I don't quite see how it's wrong of me when the subject of the matter is myself, my personal life, and my little brother," Ed growled. Hawkeye flinched in the very slightest, knowing Ed was right and embarrassed that he'd caught them talking about him behind his back.

"Ah, this just makes matters all the simpler," Roy said, motioning for Ed to take a seat. Ed remained where he was, glowering at the three of them furiously. Only Hughes and Hawkeye were affected by his anger, however.

"How much did you hear, Fullmetal?" Roy asked airily, purposely oblivious to Ed's glare.

"Enough," Ed spat, stepping into the room and slamming the door behind him. Hawkeye caught the flash of hurt in Ed's eyes that he tried to hide by turning around to perform the action. Glancing briefly at Hughes, she knew he'd seen it as well; his expression was a pained one.

"Edward, we just want to help you," Hughes began quietly, but Ed obviously wouldn't hear any of it.

"Oh, so that's your excuse for discussing my personal problems behind my back so easily?" Ed scoffed as he spun around to glare at the man trying to reason with him. Ed rolled his eyes.

"Yep, that just makes everything _so_ much better," he said sarcastically. Hughes grimaced.

"Edward, I understand that you're angry; you have every right to be--"

"Ah, I see. And now you guys can tell me what I have the right to do and don't," Ed hissed painfully. Hawkeye opened her mouth to say something to him, but couldn't seem to find the words to respond to his statement.

"Fullmetal, stop making this harder than it has to be. They have your best interests in mind," Roy cut in, glaring at the teen, trembling with suppressed rage.

"_STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO FUCKING DO!"_ Ed yelled, before breaking down into sobs.

"_STOP TRYING TO CONTROL ME ALL THE FUCKING TIME! STOP!"_ Hughes and Hawkeye were speechless as they watched the blonde continue screaming out his frustrations.

Eventually, he tried to run forward and punch the Colonel, still sobbing, but was held back by Hughes, who pulled him into a tight embrace. He continued struggling, yelling at the man to let him go, before he became too overcome with sobs to speak, and flung his arms around the man, sobbing into his chest.

Ed felt a hand rubbing his back, and turned his head slightly to see Hawkeye gazing at him with a concerned expression, and cried harder, remembering from the previous conversation how much she trusted him, and how much he hid from her.

"…I think we need to get out of here," Hughes murmured to Hawkeye, who nodded her assent. The three of them started out, but not before both Hawkeye and Hughes had sent irritated glances back toward the Colonel. The door closed behind them, and Roy rubbed his face with a hand, sighing heavily. _'Why does everything end up as_ my_ fault?'_

XxXxXxXxXx

The three sat outside on the steps before the entrance of the building, getting some much-needed fresh air. Ed was still crying, but silently, his knees brought up to his chest as best he could with the obstruction of the baby. His arms were wrapped tightly around his knees, and his head was bent. Hawkeye still had a hand resting on his back, and Hughes just stared into the space in front of him, as he did when he was trying to make sense out of something particularly difficult.

The two gave a start when they saw golden eyes abruptly look up, and stare intently at the path leading up to the building. They saw someone shuffling towards them, and without another thought, Ed jumped up, and ran as fast as he could toward said stranger. At the sound of footsteps, the person looked up and nearly toppled over by Ed, who had jumped into his arms and begun crying.

Hawkeye and Hughes ran after the blonde, but stopped a few feet behind him. Ed was sobbing into the –was that a man, or a woman? – shoulder of the newcomer, and the stranger had arms wrapped – dare they think, _possessively? –_ around Ed's waist, murmuring something into Ed's ear that made him chuckle, though the laugh was watery.

Hawkeye and Hughes exchanged expectant glances, before approaching the couple cautiously. Violet eyes flashed upward, and caught Hawkeye's gaze, drawing her breath away.

Violet eyes, thick, long, emerald-green hair, a tall, androgynous figure- Hawkeye didn't have to look twice to know who this was.

…She _hated_ admitting that the Colonel had a knack for hitting the nail on the head when he took guesses about the young alchemist's reasons for keeping secrets from them.

"Envy! Why are you here?" Ed asked suddenly, misery gone, replaced with shock. Envy pulled out a bottle from his jacket and smirked.

"You forgot to take your vitamins, Edo. I went through all the trouble of coming to bring them to you at work because I'm such a wonderful guy," Envy grinned.

Hawkeye coughed loudly.

Ed turned his head to see her, eyebrow raised, staring at him with that "I-believe-you-were-about-to-tell-me-what-is-going-on" expression.

A short, "Shit" escaped the lovers' lips simultaneously.

XxXxXxXxXx

"And just _how_ long has this relationship been going on, Fullmetal?" Roy asked as calmly as he could, his voice just barely hiding his hostility as he glared hatefully at the shape shifter hugging Ed against himself possessively, returning his glare with an equally heated one.

Ed blushed deeply, but said nothing.

"When did it ever concern _you?_" Envy asked coolly, though the words struck Roy like he'd just been slapped.

"Since he is –and has always been– my subordinate, and I have never cared much for having secrets kept from me by them," he answered firmly. Hughes suddenly broke out into a grin.

"Well, it's better than if he'd been raped, don't you agree, Colonel? He had someone who loves him, takes care of him, and is willing to take care of the baby," He asked cheerfully. Ed looked toward him gratefully, and, catching the expression, the family-obsessed man winked back at him.

Envy found he much preferred this man's reaction than the one from the bastard sitting in front of him who'd made _his_ chibi cry, and acted as though Edo belonged to him. Ed was _his_ chibi, and _his_ alone. With that thought, Envy slipped his arms around Ed's waist. Roy's eye twitched, seeing Ed blush and mutter something about his being against PDA in front of the Colonel, but nevertheless relax into the Homunculus' embrace.

Now, Roy Mustang would _never_ admit (though it was _pretty_ obvious) that he was protective of his subordinates. And he would _never_, _ever_ admit (though it was _quite_ obvious) that he was particularly protective of Edward Elric, whom he'd invited to the military himself.

He'd never felt angry when his _other_ subordinates had girlfriends (or seen Fuery gazing at Havoc like that… _honestly_, Fuery had to make a move or _something_ before Roy _forced _him to) but seeing Fullmetal in his first, and obviously _last _relationship worried him.

Eventually, Roy merely sighed, and rubbed his eyes wearily.

"I see your point, Hughes… Fullmetal." Roy looked toward the blonde.

"Flame," Ed acknowledged, nodding once, his steady gaze never wavering.

"As much as I disapprove of your relationship, I won't _do_ anything about it. It's your choice, whom you want to be with, and I can't do anything to change that," Roy said at last. Ed blinked, surprised; he hadn't expected Roy to let him off so easily.

"And, so, Envy," Roy addressed the Sin abruptly.

"Colonel Bastard," Envy sneered, not at all effected by Roy's unusually kind words when he spoke to Ed, quoting his chibi's much-used nickname for the man. Roy did not react at all to the insult, and merely stared at him. Burning onyx eyes met blazing violet ones.

"If you ever do anything to harm that boy in the slightest, I _will_ hunt you down, and _personally_ burn you until there's nothing left," Roy said, his calm voice strange in comparison to the threatening words he was saying. Envy rolled his eyes, and snorted.

"Hah. I'd like to see you try. Why suddenly so protective, Colonel Bastard? What are you, his parent?" Envy said, hugging Ed even closer. Ed stared at the Colonel, waiting for his response. Roy's expression darkened, before it suddenly lightened.

"In a way, yes," Roy said, catching Envy off guard. Ed stared at the Colonel disbelievingly, though the smallest hint of a smirk was playing on the corners of his lips.

"…Well, in any case, he's _my_ chibi," Envy said childishly; Ed blushed crimson, and hissed his lover's name in a warning tone, although he didn't seem _so_ affected by the statement.

"Edward, you've finished all of your work today, yes?" Hawkeye asked suddenly, looking at the teen held hostage in Envy's embrace.

"Yeah," he replied, absentmindedly pushing Envy's head away from his neck with one hand and holding the arm snaked around his waist _at_ his waist with the other.

"You're dismissed, then. You may go home," Hawkeye finished.

"Did ya hear that, 'O chibi-san? We can go home, and I can have my merry little way with you!" Envy exclaimed loudly as he nuzzled his face into Ed's neck, causing a blush to spring to Ed's face. The shorter one of the two stared in disbelieving horror at the shape shifter as he was steered out of the office.

The two officers remaining in the room listened to Ed's protests and Envy's laughter until they disappeared completely (Hughes had snuck after the two with his camera). After a few minutes of thoughtful silence, Hawkeye sighed and turned her gaze to the man sitting behind the desk, staring at the door in silence.

"Well, Colonel Mustang, you should get the rest of your work for the say over with as well. We have a lot to plan for the upcoming month."

"What do you mean, Hawkeye?" Hughes asked, popping into the room. He was smiling broadly, despite the black eye that was making itself apparent (A/N: **Laughing hysterically** Ed has quite the temper, ne?)

Hawkeye actually smiled, and the two stared at her in shock.

"Well, we need to contact and inform Alphonse, Winry, anyone who has knowledge of Ed's pregnancy and those few who will eventually know or _should_ so that we can… Oh, come on, Hughes, you should know, of all people here," Hawkeye chided, almost teasingly.

Hughes looked lost one moment, and was laughing the next.

"You're a genius, Lieutenant," Hughes said, sounding impressed.

"What on earth are you _talking_ about?" Roy asked, annoyed that he was being left out of the apparent conspiracy that was forming.

Hawkeye closed her eyes, ignoring the Colonel, and her smile became a more discreet one.

"Its just one of those things I've always wanted to plan."

(Both ignoring Roy)

"I hope you won't mind if I assist."

(Both ignoring death threats if they don't stop ignoring him from Roy)

"Actually, I was _counting_ on it."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: Well, now Fuery and Havoc know about Ed's pregnancy, and the secret of Ed's lover is finally got out as well.

Joh: Yosh!

Jessie: And, yes people, I'm hint, hint, _hinting_ at HavocxFuery. There probably won't be that much about it in particular, I just like it, and want it here.

Joh: **Shrugs**

Jessie: And what are Hawkeye and Hughes up to now? Read on and review to find out!

HolyMistress: Me too.. I feel their pain. Not really. **Laughs** And yes, this mpreg is funny and fun to write.

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: When Ed and Envy talk to Brian, things are FUN! And FUNNY!

envy's flame: Envy's presence is da bomb! He makes a lot of stuff interesting! And glad ya enjoyed da lemon.

darkangel36: Fluff and lemons are fun. Glad ya like!

Forever Yours Zana: Envy + Parent Book Cuteness! I love hyper people! Your review made me laugh! **Giggles** Please write more funny ones! They make me happy! You make me happy!

MiStraLL: Glad ya liked the chappie! Very happy ya think it's cute.

Firehedgehog: **Huggles back** I know **Smiles**

Light-Hideko: Oh, oh! Would you draw his expression? **Wide eyed** I'd write a fic for you in return! OMG! I'd love to see a picture of that!

Fishtank the Stephs: **Grins** I don't think I'd mind being chased by a pregnant Edo. Cuz soon, I'd have him tied down and go all Hughes on him with my camera! I updated ASAP, though.

DEATHxBYxPAPERCUTS: **Stares wide eyed** Um… that's… **Starry eyed** That's so _kinky!_Yes, yaoi forever, alright! I'm with ya!

Me And My God Complex: **Laughs head off** Well, Envy's pretty naughty in your takes of what should've happened! Mood swings are good for Envy! Glad ya liked the update! Hope you enjoyed this one!

SoulfulZen: **Laughs hysterically after reading your review** Yes, I can't wait for Envy to realize how hard kids are.

NaitoKitsune: Glad you apparently like the lemon as much as I enjoyed writing it! **Laughs** EnvyxEdo forever, baby!

Silverz: Glad ya like my fic enough to put me on your faves! **Starry eyed** Thanks so much! **Chuckles evilly **Envy enjoyed it, oh yes he did.

Sunako Kanzaki: Glad ya like the lemon. It was very, _very_ fun to write!

Larentia Ariadne: Really? I'm very happy my mpreg meets your standards.

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Glomps you and hands you double chocolate chip cookies** I always enjoy your reviews! Brian rocks a lot of socks! Please keep on updating.

Otaku no Kochou: **Blushes** Glad ya think it's cute; I try to keep my readers (and myself) satisfied with the writing.

Caim soul eater: Here's your update! I hope you enjoyed it!

sashsa: Me? On your story alert? **Tears** S'aank you!

loathed wolf spirit: Glad you enjoyed the lemon! I am very satisfied with Brian.

Kaoru Gal: Glad you like it, Twiny! Ah, I love you; you always help me, giving me inspiration.

(Thank you for your patience while I was away! As always, thanks for the reviews! Hope you all keep on enjoying my fic! Keep on reviewing, and I'll update ASAP, as always! Toodleoo!)


	9. Surprise, Surprise!

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist.

(Ik bezit de geen Volledige Alchimist van het Metaal.)

(Je ne possède pas le plein alchimiste en métal.)

(Ich besitze nicht vollen Metalalchemisten.)

(No poseo a alquimista lleno del metal)

(Δεν είμαι κύριος του πλήρους αλχημιστή μετάλλων.) (私は完全な金属の錬金術師を所有しない.)

(我沒擁有充分的金屬方士.)

…I think you get the point.

Jessie: Whoot! Now who here can say "longest chapter yet?"

Joh: **Glomps** Yay!

Jessie: **Huggles back** I've been planning this chappie since the moment the idea occurred to me. I read the reviews, and was pleased that so many people caught on! Hope you were looking forward to reading this chappie as much as I was to writing it! I had _sooo_ much fun writing this!

Joh: So enjoy-- my sis has been working hard on this!

Jessie: Yup! Like my twiny said, enjoy, ya'll!

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"Envy…"

"C'mon, 'O chibi-san, how can it hurt?"

"Envy, please, just--"

"Did I mention just how sexy you look pregnant?"

"…Come 'ere." Envy smirked to himself triumphantly as Ed abruptly relented to his complement, pulling the Sin along with him by his wrist as he made his way from their bed to the bathroom.

Once there, Envy leaned against the wall, where he watched Ed waiting for the water to warm to his desired temperature. Finally, when the warmth of the shower seemed to meet Ed's standards, he began stripping. He blushed heavily as he sensed Envy's keen eyes roaming all over his body intently, and tried to act as nonchalant as one possibly could with their obviously horny lover staring at them naked.

He reached up to unbraid his hair, but a different pair of hands caught his. He looked from the corner of his eye to see Envy staring at him.

"Allow _me,_ Edo," Envy purred, gently sliding his fingers through the silky, slightly tousled strands of golden hair to take out Ed's braid. He didn't know it, but Ed's eyes were peacefully closed; he'd never, _ever_ admit it, but he loved when Envy toyed with his hair-- best of all, Envy knew, and would stroke Ed's hair when the teen got too stressed.

"Mmm, thanks, Envy," Ed mumbled, feeling his hair tumble around his shoulders as Envy finished unweaving his braid. Placing his hand on the wall for support, Ed cautiously stepping into the stall, making sure not to slip.

The chibi closed his eyes and tilted his face up into the spray of warm water, sighing softly. He felt his Homunculus immediately slip in behind him before two hands fell to his hips, pulling him up against the androgynous body. Ed stayed still for a while, leaning his head against Envy's shoulder while the shape shifter slid his hands down Ed's water slicked body.

Eventually Ed pulled away from Envy's embrace and held his hand out expectantly.

"Hand me the shampoo." Envy grinned and grabbed the bottle from the shelf in the stall, shoving it into the blonde's outstretched hand.

"Turn around," Ed ordered while focusing on opening the bottle. Envy did as he was told, and not long after felt fingers sifting through his long, thick emerald strands of hair. Violet eyes closed and Envy made a soft, appreciative noise deep in his throat. He enjoyed many of the small rituals he and Ed had; showering together topped as one of his absolute favorites.

A good ten to fifteen minutes later, Ed stepped back with a sigh, finally finished with his wild-haired lover's hair.

"Honestly, Envy, don't you _ever_ get sick of your long hair?" Ed wondered aloud. Envy raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"What; you don't think its sexy anymore?" he asked with a slight pout. These words brought a blush rushing to Ed's cheeks, and he looked away, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like "I never said it _wasn't_ sexy…"

"Your turn," Envy sang, picking up a different bottle of shampoo and pouring some into the palm of one hand before turning the teen around with the other. Ed's eyes closed halfway as Envy gave Ed's hair the same treatment Ed had given his.

It took Envy half the time it had taken Ed to finish washing Ed's hair. He stepped back from the blonde, but Ed turned around, quickly slipping his arms around his neck.

Envy blinked and smirked, snaking his arms around Ed's waist as best he could with the large bump on Ed's belly intervening. He leant down and captured Ed's lips with his own, nibbling gently on his bottom lip and immediately granted entry. Envy moved forward, forcing Ed back up against the wall and kissed him even more deeply, their kiss getting sloppier as they frantically tried to touch as much of the other as they possibly could. Envy's hands subconsciously began to lower and, alarmed, Ed immediately snapped back to reality.

"E-Em'vy…Em'vey, stmp," Ed murmured, discovering he was unable to speak clearly while battling the Sin's tongue with his own. Realizing he couldn't speak, he tried to shove Envy away as gently as he possibly could.

Envy subtly shook his head and crushed his lips against Ed's more forcefully, ending any and all coherent words coming from the blonde. His hands continued to lower, and the smothered noises from Ed's throat increased in their frequency and urgency. He shrugged them off, simply too engrossed in finally touching the small alchemist the way he hadn't been allowed for the past few months to care.

Violet eyes snapped open as Envy abruptly registered two hands on his chest, struggling to push him back. His eyes immediately met wide, panicked gold ones, and he hastily pulled away. The two stared at each other, and the smaller male gasped raggedly, a hand on his heaving chest. Envy grimaced and looked away biting his lip; he'd _really_ gone overboard this time…

"E-En--Envy, w-wh…at the f-fuck was tha…t?" Ed whimpered between pants, his golden eyes focusing on Envy accusingly. Envy closed his eyes tightly, feeling the guilt quickly wracking him.

"Chibi, I didn't…" Envy trailed off hopelessly, before looking back at the frightened blonde with a pained expression.

"I didn't mean to do that… I didn't know what I was doing--"

"Oh, really? It seemed you pretty much knew what the fuck you were doing to _me,_" Ed suddenly snapped, his mood changing for the worse.

"Are you _honestly_ _so_ fucking self-absorbed that you won't even pause for a fucking second and think about what you're doing? That you might hurt _me_ or the _baby?"_ Ed screamed. His last statement hit home, and the Homunculus flinched as though he'd been whacked over the head with Winry's infamous Amazon wrench. He opened his mouth to try and speak, but found he couldn't get any sound past the lump in his throat that had formed.

"Edward, I'm _so_ sorry," Envy finally managed to say softly. Ed's heart skipped a beat when he heard the Homunculus use his full name; when was the last time he'd ever been called more than "Ed?" The boy didn't have to think about it for long; he knew for a fact that the Sin --no matter how serious things had gotten before today-- had never _once_ addressed him by anything else then a nickname.

Immediately, Ed felt horrible for having sunk so low as to have hit such a sensitive spot for the Sin, and started toward his unnervingly quiet lover.

"Envy…?" Ed started warily, reaching out a hand to caress the face hidden behind wet locks of hair. _'Damn… he looks like he's in a near depression,'_ Ed thought guiltily.

Envy's eyes reluctantly rose to look at the blonde, and widened when the smaller boy placed a light, forgiving kiss on his lips before he began to wash his body thoroughly with the soap. Ed finished quickly and hopped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and leaving Envy alone in the bathroom. A small, weak smirk managed to form on Envy's lips.

'_Damn… Ed can be _so_ confusing sometimes,'_ he thought to himself as he reached for the bar of soap.

XxXxXxXxXx

Envy walked out of the bathroom some time later, busy towel drying his hair. He stopped a few feet away from the bathroom door, staring ahead blankly at the blonde standing by the bed, who it seemed had just finished pulling on his baggy sweatshirt.

Ed glanced to the side to see an utterly nude Homunculus standing by the doorway, dripping wet. He blushed despite himself.

"Envy… you can't just dry off _in_ the bathroom?" He asked, his tone exasperated, but playful. Envy flashed Ed a grin, inwardly grateful that Ed was just brushing off the incident in the shower, apparently aiming for a normal day (whatever _normal_ meant, anyway).

"Meh… but that would be too _normal_, 'O chibi-san."

Ed merely raised an eyebrow in response before and walking to the mirror hung on the closet door. He gazed at his reflection before his mouth fell open in horror.

"Ne, what's wrong, Chibi?" Envy asked, seeing Ed's reaction to his reflection. He shape shifted his usual attire on before walking up behind Ed. The Sin frowned, unable to see Ed's dilemma. But once he'd realized where Ed's gaze was focused and had lowered his own eyes, he _immediately_ realized Ed's problem.

"…_Oh,_" Envy mumbled lamely.

"Whaddya mean, _'oh?'_ This is fucking _awful! _It doesn't hide the baby anymore," the young alchemist snapped angrily. Envy flinched slightly; the chibi didn't seem to be taking the situation as well as he'd hoped he would. Well, maybe it wasn't _that_ bad… It could be worse; at least Ed wasn't crying.

"What am I gonna _do?"_ Ed wailed, turning on the waterworks. Envy mentally banged his head against a wall, but rubbed Ed's back sympathetically, remaining silent; he had long since decided not saying anything would be the best solution in this case. He _reeeaaally _didn't want to upset the temperamental chibi any further than he already had.

So no words at all was definitely the right move here, right?

"Well? You're not even gonna _try_ to help?" Ed snapped irritably, turning around and glaring daggers at the Homunculus in question.

…Wrong. _Dammit_, when the _fuck_ was he gonna start to get this _right_?

"Chibi, there's not much we can do about it anymore. Either you can go into work and hope that no one notices, or you can use that excuse Brian gave you," Envy replied with a helpless shrug. Ed's bit his cheek.

"I don't wanna use that, yet, though," Ed murmured, toying with a strand of Envy's hair. Envy rolled his eyes.

"Why the fuck not? You've been pushing the excuse back for_ever!_" Envy said impatiently.

"I just hate being in the Colonel Bastard's debt, _okay_?" Ed immediately retorted. Envy raised a questioning eyebrow.

"Why would you be in his debt?"

"'Cause he'd be covering for my absence. When I can't come in, that's what happens-- I end up owning him a favor, and lemme tell you, that is _not_ a good feeling," Ed growled. Envy frowned, trying to make sense out of the deal.

"I don't like that setup. Why can't he just cover for you and leave it at that?" Envy asked, moving closer to embrace his small lover.

"''Equivalent Exchange.'"

"…E'scuse me?"

"_'Equivalent Exchange,'"_ Ed repeated slowly, "we're alchemists, so we base all of our knowledge on the term.

"Anyways, it looks like I'm gonna have to hope for the best at work, today," Ed moaned, apparently out of his temporary state of denial. Sighing heavily, he began moving away from the mirror.

Envy snaked his arms around Ed's waist, stopping the boy in his tracks. Ed sighed again, this time in complete exasperation.

"Envy, I gotta get to work…" Ed muttered, trying to pry himself out of Envy's grasp.

"But I miss you," Envy murmured huskily, brushing away Ed's damp hair from the back of his neck and pressing soft kisses against it. Ed shivered and melted into Envy's embrace; his neck's sensitivity was a secret he and Envy alone shared.

"Envy, _honestly,_ I've gotta get going. Roy will have my ass if I'm late," Ed groaned, reluctantly trying to pull Envy's arms away. Envy let out a possessive growl.

"No, you're ass is already _mine_," Envy grumbled, pouting slightly. Ed flushed deeply at Envy's vulgar (yet true) remark, but continued to try to escape the fortress that was Envy's arms.

"Envy, let go-_ohhh…_" Ed's impatient whine trailed off into a soft moan when the Homunculus began wetly mouthing the back of his neck. Ed's eyes closed, and he tilted his head, letting the (triumphant) shape shifter have better access to his neck.

Ed abruptly pulled away from a totally unsuspecting Envy, who was left blinking in the middle of the room as Ed strode out the door, yelling something about being home at the usual time.

Ed was at the front door when arms (once again) caught him around the waist. He spun around angrily.

"_Env-"_ His frustrated yell was suppressed by Envy's lips, who had pulled him into a gentle kiss. Soft gestures such as these were rare coming from the raunchy Homunculus, so Ed –very surprised– blinked, but kissed back. Again, he was taken aback when not he, but _Envy_ broke the kiss, and didn't smirk, but _smiled_ at him.

"I'm sorry about this morning," Envy said seriously. Ed smiled back and closed his eyes, leaning forward to rest his head against Envy's chest (**1**).

After a minute of comfortable silence, Ed pulled away. Glancing at his watch, he cursed softly.

"Shit, I'm gonna be late," he mumbled. He sighed, but before he could even reach for the doorknob the phone rang. Ed threw his hands up into the air, made a face, let out a loud, irritated noise and stomped his way toward the phone, muttering under his breath. Envy was on his heels, snickering softly.

Ed grabbed the phone, and greeted the unknown caller with a polite, "Who is this and what the hell d'ya want? I'm late for work, so make this qui--" Ed blinked, and cut off from his hasty rant.

"_Hughes?_ Is that you?" Ed asked incredulously.

"Why are you calling me from work; don't you have work to do? Is everything okay? And if this is a call to tell me about _Elysia,_ I swear…" Ed left the threat hanging, allowing the man's imagination to fill in the blank. Nevertheless, he listened intently to the man on the other side of the line.

"_Whaa…? _Why?" Ed asked with a frown, glancing over his shoulder at Envy. He paused, listening. He suddenly paled, and shook his head furiously, seemingly forgetting that the older male couldn't see him.

"No! Nonono, that's fine! That's just _fine!_ I'll bring him along! …Huh-- no! Nooo, you know I don't have anything against babysitting Elysia… _No_, I'm not holding a grudge against her just because of the last time I came over to watch her…" here, Envy noticed with mild interest, Ed shuddered.

"Yeah… Yeah okay. _Okay, **fine**._" Ed slammed the phone back down on the receiver. "Blackmailing _asshole,_" he hissed. He turned back to look at Envy who was still standing behind him, his arms crossed and head titled to the side in curiosity.

"Well, looks like you're comin' to work with me today, Envy," Ed sighed, raking his fingers through his hair. Envy's eyes narrowed in confusion.

"What? Why?" He asked, intently watching Ed twist his hair into a neat French braid. Ed flicked it back over his shoulder and looked toward Envy.

"Because if I don't, he's gonna blackmail me into babysitting for Elysia," Ed replied, starting toward the door.

"But I thought you _liked_ the human brat," Envy said.

"Envy, liking and babysitting are two _completely_ different things. One is simply an affection and the other involves me being forced to let her glitter-fy my hair," Ed deadpanned.

XxXxXxXxXx

"…Damn," Envy said, blinking, "It's totally empty." Ed could only nod; he was shocked to see the normally noisy hallway completely silent. The couple stood at the end of the corridor that led to the Colonel's office, warily gazing down.

"Is it safe?" Envy teased, nudging Ed. Ed gave a slight shrug and chuckled, walking toward the office door with Envy by his side. The blonde reached for the door, opening it and frowning into the dark room. _'What the hell…? Where is everyone?'_ Ed thought as he stepped inside--

"_SURPRISE!"_ Ed jumped a foot into the air, and felt Envy twitch behind him. The lights flickered on (by a broadly smiling Fuery) to show the entire company. Ed's mouth dropped open as he took in the office…

The office was very, _very_ different. So different, in fact, he was _sure_ he was dreaming. The room was filled with blue and pink streamers and balloons. The middle of the floor was empty and served as a dance floor (or was put to that use, as Hughes was happily dancing with Gracia).

Most of the desks had been pushed to the back of the room. Three or four of them had been pushed together and covered with a large tablecloth, with all of the chairs surrounding the makes shift table. Said table was _covered_ in food (courtesy of Gracia).

"What…the…" Ed was rendered speechless save for a few splutters of confusion. Hawkeye walked up to him with a small smile.

"We thought it'd be nice to have a formal celebration for you, Edward," she explained, gesturing about the room.

"…Why?" Ed finally managed to ask, staring at Hawkeye in complete bafflement.

"Well, what did you expect? We couldn't just let your pregnancy pass without throwing you a proper baby shower," Hawkeye replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

And then it hit him like a ton of bricks; the concept that his friends had actually had the nerve to throw him a baby shower –a fucking _baby_ _shower_, for cryin' out loud- slowly sunk in. Ed bowed his head, his bangs obstructing his eyes from view. Envy warily wrapped an arm around the teen's shoulders, prepared to hold him close if the need came to be.

"…You guys…went through all the trouble…of planning a stupid party…for me?" Ed asked quietly, the emotion in his face unreadable. Hawkeye nodded, though she knew Ed couldn't see.

"Yes we did, Edward. We all care about you and your well being. If you ever need support, we're here. That's another thing this gathering represents-- these are the people who you can always count on," she said, her voice holding a rare warmth.

Envy noticed –and not with a little anxiety- that Ed's entire body had started shaking. Hawkeye seemed to have become aware of the motion as well, for she stepped toward him.

The next thing a bewildered Hawkeye knew, she was being hugged tightly by Ed, who was sobbing uncontrollably. She awkwardly patted Ed's back, his small frame racking with violent sobs.

"I can't believe you guys did all this for me," Ed wailed, thus bringing everyone's attention to the commotion that was the chibi.

"And… and… I _hate_ hormoooones," he howled, positively hysterical at this point.

Gracia stepped forward from Hughes' embrace and gently pried the boy away from Hawkeye, hugging him gently and rubbing his back.

Whatever Graica whispered into Ed's ear must have been soothing, for whatever the more-experienced mother said immediately reduced him from streaming tears to quiet sniffles. Questioning golden eyes lifted to meet her gaze, and she smiled.

Suddenly, Ed was all smiles, and he moved away from Gracia's hold to Envy.

Now that the drama was over (for the moment), the entire company returned to whatever they had been doing before (i.e: Gracia was pulled into a dance by Hughes once more, Roy and Hawkeye continued whatever argument they had been holding before, and Falman, Fuery, Breda and Havoc resumed whatever game of cards they were playing).

"Can you believe this?" Ed grinned, looking up at Envy for his reaction. The Homunculus, it seemed, was still in shock before Ed's voice had torn him away from his reverie.

"…No," Envy replied honestly, blinking bemused, wide amethyst eyes.

"Me neither. God, I _never_ expected them to do anything like _this,_" Ed laughed, shaking his head and laughing softly. He looked up at Envy again, and his smiled when he realized Envy was slumped over.

"Envy, what's wrong?" Ed asked, seeing the slight frown that had taken residence on his features.

"Chibi, you know _just_ as fucking well as I do that _I don't like humans,_" Envy grumbled miserably.

"Envy, this is different. _These_ are a bunch of _humans_ who I care about, and who care about _me,_" Ed explained matter-of-factly. Envy's eyes scanned the crowded office.

"Well… at least it can't get any worse than _this_," Envy sighed.

But we _all_ know Murphy -and his damnable laws- for at that precise moment, a bundle of blue-eyed, blonde energy (also known as Ed's childhood friend, Winry Rockbell) came hurtling toward Ed, pulling him into a tight hug. Al calmly walked in after the overly excited girl, wearing a smile. Pinako followed after the boy with a disbelieving expression on her face.

Envy smacked himself squarely on the head.

"Congratulations, Ed!" Winry squealed happily. She sighed, clasping her hangs together.

"Just think; I'm gonna be an aunt in only _three_ months!" She sighed happily. Ed felt a hand land on his shoulder and look up to see Al beaming at him.

"How've you been, Nii-san?" Al asked earnestly, his gaze flickering down to the undeniable swell. Ed smiled and reached up to ruffle Al's hair fondly.

"I've been fine, thanks," Ed replied with a reassuring grin. Al's smile broadened, and he glanced toward the sulking, cross-armed male behind Ed.

"Ah… Um… How are you, Envy?" Al asked hesitantly. Envy's eyes snapped open and narrowed toward the cat-obsessed teenager. He was about to retort with some sort of pissy comment, but he caught Ed's warning look, and, with a sigh, closed his eyes once more.

"I'm… I'm doin' all right," he muttered wearily. Al blinked; he too had obviously been expecting some kind of angry response. His amber eyes shone with concern; seeing the Homunculus so excruciatingly bothered worried him.

"…You really don't want to be here, do you...?" The Sin looked up at the younger Elric in surprise; the empathic boy was looking at him with sympathizing eyes. Was he that easy to read?

Ed chuckled softly, and brushed a few stray strands of emerald hair that managed to fall past the headband away.

"You'd better make the best out of this you can, Envy; I really dunno what else to say," the blonde said quietly. Envy managed a smirk.

"I… think I'll manage to survive a few hours with… _them_," Envy said dramatically. Ed snorted and rolled his eyes, mumbling a soft, "yeah, you'd better, bastard," before straying away from his lover as he started toward a shocked-looking Pinako, whose pipe had fallen from her lips (very much like Havoc's cigarette had a month ago).

Ed was deeply immersed in a conversation about the weight of his automail effecting his growth (he argued that when he'd visited Rush Valley, a master mechanic has spoken those words to him) when someone tapped his shoulder.

Frowning, Ed turned around; he had been ready to tell said person off for interrupting, but all vocal responses left him then and there, and all he could do was gape in horror.

Dreadlocks, a red tattoo by her left collar bone, piercing dark eyes… Yes, Ed could identify this new comer easily; just as well as his little brother could. After a moment of speechlessness, he managed to crack a nervous smile.

"W-why, Se-Sensei… Th-this is, um… quite a su-surprise," he gulped. Her eyes narrowed, and he could hear her foot tapping all too well; one of the signs of anger he remembered both he and his brother used to be all too wary for.

"And seeing you -for the first time in _years_- pregnant -which, might I add is not at all normal; just a few years back, wasn't your life goal to regain Al's body and your arm and leg so you could have a _normal_ lifestyle?- with your previous enemy's child, who _just_ so happens to be your lover as well _isn't_ surprising, Edward?" Izumi continued sweetly, a smile plastered on her face. Ed flinched, but didn't respond, choosing to stare at the floor by her feet.

"W-well, about that…" Ed started nervously, fidgeting guiltily where he stood.

"Don't you say _any_thing," Izumi snapped, her dark eyes narrowing. Ed's mouth snapped shut, and Envy watched with increasing interest. _'Hmm, maybe hanging around humans isn't_ so _bad… they are, indeed, a great source of entertainment… Besides, I've never seen Ed shut up on command in response to anyone other than myself,' _he mused, a smirk forming on his lips, continuing to watch the berating unfolding before him.

"I _would_ teach you a lesson with my hands--" Ed's gaze snapped to Izumi at her threatening words, and he shook his head rapidly so that his bangs flapped against his face, his golden eyes wide with horror.

"--But due to your current condition, I won't," she finished. His eyes closed and his shoulders slumped in relief. There was a pause before the housewife smiled grimly.

"You may now begin apologizing profusely," she announced. Ed blinked stupidly for a moment, before apologizes began rapidly pouring from his lips. Izumi stood, arms crossed, staring the boy down, making sure he apologized as best and fluently as he knew how.

Finally, the flow of words stopped when he felt arms pull him into a warm hug. Once he'd registered it was Izumi his mouth fell slightly open, and he was rendered speechless.

"Congratulations, Edward," she murmured into his ear before moving away and smiling affectionately at him.

'_Ah…what just happened?'_ he thought, bewildered by her sudden warmth toward him. _ 'Yeaaah… somethin's not right here.'_

"Uh… Sensei?" Ed began hesitantly

"Yes, Edward?"

"…Aren't you letting me off a _bit_ easily?" He asked suspiciously. Izumi stared at him before bursting out laughing. The blonde stared at her in confusion while a sinking feeling began to make itself known.

"Yes, well, I know my reaction is quite a bit less… _ruthless _than to be expected from me, but I think the pain of labor will make up for it by at _least_ tenfold," she beamed.

Ed blushed slightly at her words before completely processing them and blanching. She smirked when she saw Ed's reaction, confirming her words had gotten through to him, and strode off to talk to a (nearly cowering) Alphonse.

Ed breathed in shakily, before turning to stare at the quietly sniggering Homunculus behind him.

Golden eyes narrowed.

All too late, Envy realized Ed had noticed him.

'_Aw, shit.'_

XxXxXxXxXx

Everyone looked up at the loud _"FUCK!"_ that came out of seemingly nowhere, before their eyes landed on the blonde stalking off angrily from the wild-haired Sin in a heap on the floor, clutching his obviously aching groin (All of the men in the room winced for the poor, non-human's sake).

"God, I hope that wasn't Ed's automail leg…" Fuery whispered –his voice full of sympathy- to the person sitting next to him. Said person happened to be Havoc who nodded in turn, gazing at Envy with pity.

"He must go through God-knows-what, bein' in a relationship with the Chief, an' all, y'know?" Havoc muttered back, patting the raven-haired male on the back.

Fuery (who must have suddenly registered that this was _Havoc_ he was talking to and who was _touching_ him) nodded quickly and turned his head away, blushing deeply. The tall blonde didn't miss the blush this time, and cracked a small smile- _'Aw, he's blushin'… how cute.'_

Deciding to see what more of a reaction he could get from the young Sergeant, Havoc slipped an arm, his smile turning into more of a smirk when he heard the nearly inaudible _"eep!"_ that escaped the Fuery's lips.

"Hah, you're pretty cute, know that?" Havoc whispered into Fuery's ear. Fuery's knees nearly buckled, and he would have most likely fallen over if Havoc hadn't chosen that moment to pull the trembling male onto his lap. Fuery tensed, his breaths quickening.

Slowly, after a few moments of staring at the smiling-encouragingly blonde had passed, Fuery began to relax back against the study body, thanking his lucky stars that Jean Havoc was finally ­–_finally– _noticing him in the way he really –_really–_ wanted to be noticed.

**Meanwhile…**

"Hey, Breda! Falman!" Roy called across the room. When the two said men looked up he beckoned them over, a smug smirk fixed on his lips.

"You both owe me thirty bucks and one week of doing my paperwork, _each_," he whispered gleefully, gesturing subtly over to the blonde, who at that moment was sneakily snaking his arms around a flushed co-worker settled in his embrace.

The two men smacked their heads, groaning.

"The Colonel never misses a beat," Breda sighed forlornly, Falman nodding his assent miserably

XxXxXxXxXx

Ed felt an urgent tap on his back, and he politely excused himself from a chattering Elysia to turn to see his brother.

"What's up, Al…" Ed trailed off when he realized the state Al was in. The teen was anxiously wringing his hands and biting the inside of his cheek; a habit he'd had when he was younger, and was put to use either when he was attempting an alchemical equation or was terribly worried.

"Nii-san, umm… I-isn't, that the "Lust-lady?" Al asked nervously, pointing to the office entrance.

Now, Ed knew better than anyone just how rare it was that the brunette stuttered. Immediately, Ed looked at Envy –who was back at his side by this point– and saw the incredulously written all over the shape shifter's face. With a deep breath, the chibi moved his gaze to the doorway.

True to Al's word, there stood the voluptuous female Homunculus by the door, staring with piercing violet eyes –identical to those of his lover's– right back at him.

While she was still unnoticed by the rest of the guests, the lady slinked over toward the trio, frozen in place.

"So this is where you've been hiding all this time, Envy?" Lust asked, breaking the tense silence. She arched an elegant eyebrow at the two Elrics standing together, still stunned speechless at her unanticipated appearance.

"…I see. So you've decided to live your life like this? Going directly against the wishes of 'That Person?'" Lust inquired. Envy's hands clenched tightly, forming two, shaking fists at his sides.

"Who are _you_ to tell me what's right and what's not?" He hissed quietly as he raised a threatening fist. The last thing he wanted at the moment was to gather any attention to their little "reunion."

Lust blinked, seeming genuinely surprised.

"Why, Envy," she purred at last, "I don't recall saying any of the sort. Nor did I have any intention to, by the way."

Envy blinked, and his fist fell back to his side (though his fingers had yet to uncurl).

"You don't?" He asked suspiciously. Lust smiled in the slightest, shaking her head.

"Is it true that you're really gotten the Fullmetal boy pregnant?" Lust asked; she was obviously intrigued by the way she spoke. Envy's eyes widened slightly.

"How…?"

"That just confirmed my suspicions," Lust smirked at her brethren, who appeared to be mentally beating himself. Her smirk lightened into an amused smile.

"Not to mention I'd already gotten the general gist from the cards on the table," she continued, delicately holding up a card she must have picked up from the table piled with gifts and cards by the doorway.

"In any case, the true reason I came to find you is to know how you could have _possibly _had the nerve to keep a soon-to-be-aunt from finding out that she is going to have a niece or nephew," Lust chided, sounding utterly serious. All three mouths fell open.

"Wait… _what?_" Ed asked skeptically. Al merely tilted his head, blinking in confusion; he appeared to be just as speechless as Envy was at the moment (though the male Homunculus. Lust sighed (almost huffily) and frowned slightly.

"What; you don't think I want in on this child, too?" She asked dubiously. Her frown deepened when all three boys nodded dumbly.

"Well, I never," she sniffed, looking away dejectedly. Al –ever the one to hate seeing _anyone_ upset– regained his voice first.

"Uh, Miss Lust? It's… not that we're excluding you, it's just… we're surprised that you seem to be so… interested," he said quietly. Lust's eyebrows raised in interest as her gaze fixed on the quiet brunette, openly surprised by his politeness.

"Oh, so that's the case, then, is it?" She pushed, waiting for Ed and Envy's answers. Ed lifted an arm and sheepishly scratched the back of his neck.

"I… think Al said it all, for _me_ at least," he answered, shooting a look at Envy. Envy crossed his arms; looking away and mumbling a response that sounded remotely like an agreement. Lust clapped her hands eagerly.

"Oh, good!" Lust looked back over her shoulder, smiling.

"Did you hear that, Wrath? You're going to have a cousin!" She exclaimed. Envy's eyes narrowed.

"The brat's here?" He mumbled haughtily. Amethyst eyes –once again, Ed observed, so much like Envy's own– peered around Lust's curvy form to make a face at the green-haired Sin from where he was safe from harm.

"Gee; nice to see you, _too_, Envy," Wrath muttered angrily. Suddenly, the little Sin was all smiles, popping up in front of the bewildered blonde.

"_I_ think it's really cool that you're havin' a baby, Ed," Wrath said sweetly, beaming at the teen.

"But what I don't understand is why you chose to have that _bastard's_ kid," Wrath said, staring up innocently while pointing a finger at the Homunculus shaking with suppressed rage.

"Well, Wrath, to tell ya the truth, I honestly don't _know._ I just know that I love him dearly, and that he's not just any bastard; he's _my_ bastard," Ed said (almost endearingly) as he glanced fondly –and not with a little amusement– at Envy's seething figure.

"Hello? I'm here, you know," Envy grumbled, shooting a death glare at the giggling Wrath who had embraced the chibi in a hug. _'Little bastard… suckin' up to _my _chibi cuz he knows he my weakness…' _Envy thought hatefully. Lust had been listening intently to the conversation and sighed deeply, gaining Al's attention.

"What's wrong, Lust?" He asked. Lust looked at him with a tiny, sad smile.

"It's silly, I know, but… I guess you could say I'm, well, _envious_ of _Envy_, if you know what I mean," Lust began. Al stared at the Homunculus, puzzled.

"How so?" He asked softly.

"Out of all the Homunculi, I suppose… No, _I am_ the one most desperate to become human." Al looked at her in confusion.

"Why? Don't you like being immortal?" He asked. Lust laughed mirthlessly.

"What's the point in being able to live forever if you can't _feel_ anything emotionally," she asked.

"I, for one, don't liking living without emotion; it basically takes the meaning out of life, wouldn't you agree? We Homunculi don't have the same kinds of feelings a human being would.

"But Envy has someone to love –despite that factor– and, more importantly, he someone who loves him back." Lust concluded.

"And _that's_ why I want to be human most of all; so that _I_ could have feelings, too, and have someone who loves _me_," she added wistfully.

Al stared at the forlorn woman, suddenly seeing her in a different light. He now found himself feeling compassionate toward her, because he found himself agreeing word for word with what she had said.

"Wrath, come along; we'd best be leaving, now, before we're noticed," Lust said after a minute of silence. Wrath spared her a brief glance.

"Oh. Okay," Wrath replied unhurriedly, before smiling brightly at the young alchemist he'd been amiably chatting with before.

"I'll see ya soon, Uncle Ed!" Wrath chirped waving before Lust grabbed his wrist to drag him away. Ed chuckled, and waved after the young Homunculus; apparently, the little boy had charmed his way to pushing the hatred Ed had previously held for him from the prodigy's mind.

"I don't know _why_ you think he's so awful, Envy; he seemed alright to me," Ed said as he turned to face Envy with a slight shrug. Envy glowered after his little "brother;" apparently Ed had just conveniently missed the boy sticking his tongue out at Envy.

XxXxXxXxXx

"Open mine first!"

"No way! You should open _mine_ first, Ed!"

"Hey, hey, hey come _on!_ He's gonna open them _all_ up in the end! (Whispered:) You should really open _mine_ first!"

(Multiple voices:) "Havoc!"

Ed rolled his eyes playfully and laughed as present after present was shoved into his face, nearly every guest begging him to open theirs _first._

"Well, Havoc _did_ have a point--"

"So you'll open mine first?" (Hopeful)

"Ah, no," Ed chuckled at the pout that formed on Havoc's face and jokingly shoved the man (struggling to keep the pout on his face) away.

"Ah, lemme see here, uh--" the small blonde eyed all the excited faces, and finally smiled at…

"Fuery! You're being patient," he said, teasingly glancing around at the rest of the jumpy guests. Fuery smiled happily at being chosen first (for once) for something, and held out the neatly wrapped package to his friend.

Ed took his time opening the package; meaning he eagerly ripped away the wrapper paper, earning chuckles from the small crowd now seated around him. Earlier the group had formed a circle of chairs so that everyone could all sit and comfortably watch Ed open his presents; there were quite a lot. Well… Ed was an exception; he had his favorite seat that _just_ so happened to be Envy.

Envy rested his chin on Ed's shoulder as the teen lifted the cover to the box that had been wrapped, and grinned as he maneuvered his arm around Ed and plucked a soft teddy bear from the wrapping paper. Ed's eyes shone happily as he thanked a happily flushed Fuery profusely, placing it back carefully in the box and setting it aside.

After another minute of commotion, Ed had selected the next person to hand him his present (which happened to be Winry) and he carefully tore off the bow, setting it in Envy's headband. Everyone chuckled at how ridiculous the Sin looked with a huge, shiny pink bow in his hair, and the Homunculus –to Ed's immense relief– took it in stride, smirking and replied saying they were all just jealous of how sexy he looked, gaining yet another laugh from the group.

"Tadaaa! Isn't it just the cutest little thing?" Winry exclaimed happily as Ed lifted and shook out a small, pink dress with little yellow ducks from the box it had been so carefully wrapped in. He sweatdropped but had himself a little (slightly nervous) laugh.

"You're really sure this is gonna be a girl, huh, Winry?" He asked. She nodded confidently, smirking at the now-pouting Al seated next to her. Ed grinned at the blue-eyed girl.

"Heh, thanks, Win," he said earnestly. Winry smiled back, pleased that Ed seemed to appreciate her gift seriously, unlike a certain _brunette_,_ cat-obsessed_ Elric…

Another hour found the blonde surrounded by opened presents, completely finished opening gifts and cards (the Hughes' present_s_ had by far been the most considerate ones; having gone and bought the necessary furnishings for the baby's room; something Ed and Envy had planned on going about that coming week).

Everyone was reclining in small groups or pairs as they happily talked and joked while eating Gracia's delicious, homemade-cake she had kindly made for the party.

Ed had been explaining some alchemical theory to his younger brother, who was nodding and listening intently. Inevitably, though he had _tried _to pay attention (Ed had to give him credit for that) Envy had gotten bored very quickly and was staring into space, chin propped up on his fist, staring at the funny scene Fuery and Havoc were providing; the younger appeared to be trying to have some modest conversation while inconspicuously keeping the eager blonde's hands out of his pants.

"--It all comes back to 'Equivalent Exchange," Al, so I don't get where you're stuck," Ed said, sounding a little exasperated after having explained the theory no less that three and a half times.

"Yes, yes, I get all of _that_," Al waved a hand impatiently.

"But what I'm _talking_ about, is the-- Nii-san? Nii-san, are you okay?" Al suddenly asked, seeing Ed's sudden pallor.

"What's wrong, Nii-san?" The unusual urgency in Al's voice got Envy's attention, and he craned his neck to see Ed's face.

"Ne, Chibi, what's wrong?" Envy asked, puzzled by Ed's strange expression; his eyes had widened considerably, and his mouth was open, but he couldn't seem to form any words.

"It-it's not that baby, is it?" Al suddenly asked, seeing one of Ed's hands go to his stomach. Ed seemed to be shaken out of his stunned silence when he heard the word "baby," and smiled nervously.

"No, Al, I'm fine, it's just…" Ed's gaze fell to his round belly.

"I've never… felt the baby move before… I mean, there've been times in the past when I _thought_ I did –when I was sleeping and sometimes when I was awake– but I thought either a was dreaming or just imagining it… Guess not," he chuckled, a grin starting to form on his lips when he saw the awed look on Al's face.

"Really? What's it like?" Al asked, eyes wide.

"Dunno… it's _really_ hard to explain," Ed replied honestly, shrugging helplessly.

Suddenly realizing Envy still had yet to react, Ed turned his head, only to burst out laughing at the mixed expression of disbelief and delight.

"…You're shitting me," Envy murmured at last, raising and eyebrow as Ed shook head, smiling broadly.

Ed took Envy by the wrist, placing his hand where his own had been resting, and waited expectantly in silence.

Envy stared at his hand, until out of nowhere he felt the slightest flutter of movement beneath his palm. Purple eyes, previously narrowed in concentration widened in shock, and Ed grinned.

After resting his hand on Ed's tummy for a few more minutes –trying to conceive that the motion was coming from his and Ed's child– Envy lifted his hand and placed it on Ed's cheek, turning the blonde's face further towards his and locking their lips in a gentle, grateful kiss.

"…Wow," was all Envy could mumble once they'd pulled apart.

"'Wow,'" Ed echoed with a laugh, nodding. His attention was turned to his fidgeting little brother; the boy was unable to hide his excitement for Ed and his partner.

"Uh, um… Can I?" Al asked rapidly, smiling happily when Ed nodded. Ed shook his head slightly in amusement when Al gasped softly; the baby, it seemed, had chosen to move just as Al rested his fingertips against Ed's belly.

"…That's _amazing_, Onii-chan," Al said breathlessly. Ed cracked a teasing grin.

"If you're so excited by kids, _you_ should concentrate on gettin' it on with--" A hand was hastily slapped over Ed's lips; Al's panicked eyes narrowed at the smug expression Ed was wearing.

"Nii-san, please… just… just _don't_," Al said meekly, his eyes darting about the room nervously; a light pink color tingeing his cheeks.

Ed chuckled softly before saying something, however his words were muffled by Al's hand. Al stared at him in confusion before deeming it safe to remove his hand to let Ed talk.

"I said: Don't worry, your secret's safe with me 'til ya decide to tell your little crush how much ya love her," Ed repeated. Al let out a relieved sigh, and offered his brother a little smile.

XxXxXxXxXx

Ed let out an exhausted, strangled noise of relief as he plopped down on their bed. Envy sent the blonde a strange look from the doorway before sitting down beside him.

"That was... an eventful day, to say in the least, ne?" Envy teased, lifting a hand to run his fingers through Ed's long, golden bangs.

"You're tellin' _me_," Ed laughed wearily, stripping off his clothing and dropping everything onto the floor in a heap, too tired to get up to put said articles of clothing into the hamper.

Envy slipped under the covers, waiting until his chibi had finished undressing to move to turn off the bedside light. Ed slipped into the bed beside him, nestling up to his lover.

"'M gon' star usen docs 'scuse 'morrow," Ed mumbled sleepily. Envy stared down at the blonde blankly.

"I understood nothing just then…" Envy deadpanned. Ed glared up at Envy as best he could in his drowsy state.

"I'm. Gonna. Start. Using. The. Doc's. Excuse. Tomorrow," Ed enunciated clearly.

"Ah. That's good, I won't be lonely anymore," Envy smirked, sounding pleased.

"Mmm, horny bastard… geez you gettin' deaf or somethin'?" Ed trailed off groggily, his golden eyes slipping closed. His breaths gradually slowed and evened out, alerting Envy that his chibi was, as of now, quite dead to the world.

After wrapping his arms around the blonde protectively, a content smile rose to his lips and the Homunculus closed his vibrant violet eyes, quickly falling asleep listening to Ed's breathing.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

**1**: **Starry eyed** Kodak moment! Hahaha, sorry, I didn't want to ruin the moment in the fic, so now it's okay!

OOooOOoo

Jessie: (Megaphone:) **FIRST OF ALL, ATTENTION, PLEASE!**

Joh: **Puts in ear plugs, wide eyed**

Jessie: **IF YOU DON'T USUALLY READ THESE, PLEASE READ THIS ONE: **I JUST WANNA KNOW WHAT EVERYONE IS LOOKING FORWARD TO: A BABY GIRL, BOY, WHATEVER. IF YOU WOULD, PLEASE INCLUDE WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO IN YOUR REVIEW (THIS IS FOR MY OWN CURIOSITY AND CONSIDERATION; I'VE PRETTY MUCH GOTEEN EVERYTHING WORKED OUT, BUT WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHAT PEOPLE THINK THE BABY'S GONNA BE.)

Joh: …That all?

Jessie: **THAT'S ALL. THANK YOU. **(Puts microphone away)

Jessie: Another note… Wow. The end was all fluffaluffegus!

Joh: **Takes out earplugs **Ah, yeah. Okay.

Jessie: **Laughs** I know; me and those crazy words my friends and I share.

Joh: **Grins** That was a long chapter, Sis!

Jessie: I know! I'm actually quite pleased with how it turned out. And some people requested most HavocxFuery (yes! I officially helped to start spread the love for a more uncommon pairing!), and I was happy to put some in there! So yes. I worked long and _hard_ on this chapter. Please, please, please review!

loathed wolf spirit: Yes, well Roy does cause lotsa fights, and he's always getting the upper hand in them sooo… Heh, I'm evil, and lovin' it! Blushy Edo is adorable, and possessive Envy ish shmexy! **Joins you in waving EnvyxEdo flags** Honestly, I could do this all day!

Strlight99: Glad ya thought it was kawaii! **Tears** You used my favie word: "Huggles." I'm so proud. The word it spreading! You rock! **Huggles**

Jaz the Wolf: **Shrugs sheepishly** Um… I personally like baby showers (from the, like, five I've gone to). I dunno, maybe they're boring to some people. Hopefully, the baby shower in this one wasn't'!

Kaoru Gal: I'm very proud of you for trying to cut back on the cursing. Like I told you, you really don't have to curse for me. Lol, I know the video is hysterical. I was laughing so hard. And yesh, I'm Alu! I love you, Sis! **Glomps and kisses**

Shimoariku: I know, mpreg's are da bomb; a.k.a funny, sweet and awesome. **Hands invite** You're smart, you get an invite.

darkangel36: Yes, the secret is out for Envy and Edo. Roy took it so calmly since he didn't want poor Edo even more hysterical than he was before. **Hands Havoc and Fuery plushies** HavocxFuery rocks. **Nods seriously** It really does. They are totally awesome for each other; so kawaii together **Goes off into yaoi fangirl dreamland** Thanks for the nice review; made my day!

Forever Yours Zana **Glomps plushie Edo** I've never gotten an Edo plushie before; I'm so loved! Loved your review, as usual; made me laugh so hard! XD OMG, I'm reading it again and cracking up! No, no, Roy doesn't have a crush on Edo; just protective… Don't worry! EnvyxEdo all the way (at least, in _this_ one XD) baby!

Enviouse-Of-You-Kid: That was _me_ who inspired you to write that awesome fic? _Me_? I… Oh, my God! I feel really special! Glad ya still think it's awesome! 3

kakashisninjadogs: I laughed really hard when I read your review. "Giggles like a 3-yr-old in a Barbie store." Now _there's_ one I've never heard before!

HolyMistress: Thank you! You understand why Roy was so unusually gentle; didn't want more waterworks from the blonde! Hahaha, nope, but you're comment about you-know-what definitely got through to me. Shaw… I _do_ love kids… Joh-chan _hates_ them, though. **Sighs **It's a wonder we're sisters. Ah, and the shower scene: that as for you, honey! _Thank you sooo much for the idea!_

…And don't you go trying to hack into my account to get rid of my thanks to you this time!Thanks for the awesome review!

Kuroi Kitty: Glad you like it! Hope you continue to!

KnighthunterDark: I'm the sizzle… I like it! Glad you're lovin' the story, and I'm still planning the scenario for how the baby will be born (and havin' fun with it!)

NightPredator: Yup! Congrat's, you guessed right! **Huggles back** I enjoy writing it, and enjoy people lovin' it! Thank you!

FISHTaNK the Evil Fangirl: Are you related to "Fishtank the Stephs?" **Giggles** Yes, yes, Edo has quite the temper, and it was fun writing a protective Roy! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: Yes, yes! A baby shower! Hawkeye and Hughes rock! And I felt bad for Roy, too, when I was writing it. But oh well, all is good in the world (for now)! **Hands you homemade chocolate cake with ice cream** Always enjoy hearing from you! **Huggles**

telynaayuri: Bingo: Baby shower! You ish very smart! You rock!

Shakespeare'sWorstNightmare: Envy and Ed saying things in unison is rare, yet adorable! I am honestly relieved I'm keeping everyone in character; I work very, _very_ hard at that!

SoulfulZen: You get to keep your money (Lol)! Twas indeed a baby shower! And yes, Edo and Envy _had_ to have been uncomfortable in the scenario, but oh well! Their relationship _was_ accepted, and that's what matters!

yaoi chicka: (Love your pen-name!) I'm really glad you like it and think it's funny! Hope the update was fast enough for you; worked very hard on it, hope you like it and continue to!

7deadlysins-envy7: When I read you're review, it just cracked me up! I immediately thought of a scene like this:

Envy/Edo's baby: **Tugs on Ed's pants, looking up with big, cute eyes** Mommy-- (cue twitch on Edo's behalf) why does Daddy wear a skirt.

Edo: **Smirk**

Envy: It's not a skit, it's a _skort!_

Yep, laughed a lot at that little idea! I'm psyched this is your favie mpreg! Don't worry; I'm always thinking of ideas for/and or working on this fic! Your wait is not in vain! Thanks for the patience, though!

Illusionwolf: Yes. Yes I did update! Won't abandon this fic for the world! Hope you enjoyed this chappie!

MaiValentinefan: Yaaaaay! I'm _so_ glad you liked it! Sorta, _kinda_ surprised you actually read it, too XD Your review made me laugh, gal! N'ways, I love you! Can't wait to obsess over the FMA movie with you! **Squeals**

siverrain: **Claps happily** Yay! You guessed it: a baby shower! Honored to have one of my fics on your Story Alert! Glad you like it!

Me And My God Complex: Glad!

Master Fifer: **Reads all 8 reviews in shock** OMG, you reviewed ALL of my chappies even though you're starting to read it now? **Tears** How dedicated! Oh my gosh, you're sooo nice. You should've seen my face when I was scrolling down the window and show not 155, but _163_ reviews for my fic! I read all of your reviews, and was so thankful! Thank you sooo much! **Hands a chocolate chip cookie**

(So, things are going pretty quickly for envy and Ed. Just a few more months, and they're parents! Thanks for reviewing and for your endless support! I can't wait to hear from you, and what you think! Bye for now, everyone!)


	10. Preparations

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist. Boo hoo.

Jessie: First off…

**Pause**

**_OH MY GOD! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR OVER 200 REVIEWS!!!_**

Joh: **Throws confetti** Wheeeee!

Jessie: Now then, straight to the point… **Runs in circles **_Ahhhh!_ I feel so guilty; I'm sooooo sorry it took me _so freakin' long_ to update! I've been _really_ busy, and haven't had the chance to sit down and write… and when I tried I had writer's block!

Joh: **Huggles** Poor baby…

Jessie: **Sniffles** Thank you all so much for being so loyal; I can't _believe_ how patient ya'll are! …Please… don't hate me **Sweatdrops** I'm _so_ sorry for da wait. If it's _any_ consolation whatsoever, I tried to write a long chappie.

Joh: **Thumbs up** Good for you!

Jessie: Thank you to everyone who responded in their reviews for da last chapter; it helped me come to a (pretty much) final decision for the conclusion of my fic; I figure there's only a few more chapters left! So, with that, on with da fic!

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Thoughtful, golden eyes carefully studied a slip of colored paper he held loosely between two fingers, biting the inside of his cheek nervously and shifting his chin to rest on his free hand more comfortably. Envy –sitting across the table from his lover– watched intently, hoping against (what was quite obviously) all odds that Ed would come to make his final decision, therefore bringing his current predicament to a conclusion

Five minutes of silence was interrupted with:

"…Shiiiiit… this has gotta be the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life…" Ed whined hopelessly, letting the sample color slip from his grasp to join the other hundred scattered every which way on the table. Envy, restraining from yanking his hair in frustration, instead reached over to take Ed's hand into his own.

"Well, Edo, I'm _sure_ you'll manage to bring yourself to a conclusion," Envy said dramatically, squeezing Ed's hand softly. Ed's eyes narrowed toward the androgynous figure across from him.

"Well, it's not exactly as if you're _helping_… or even _pretending_ to (like you usually would for that matter)," Ed retorted accusingly, pulling his hands away from Envy and sitting further back in his chair, crossing his arms in a huff. Envy sighed, rolling his eyes for the umpteenth time.

"Chibi, I'm well aware that your pregnancy screws around with your common sense; so I'll say it _again. _ It doesn't _fucking_ _matter_ what _fucking_ _color_ we paint the **_fucking_ _room_**," Envy said slowly. Ed glared icily at the Homunculus.

"Oh yeah, I'm _sure_ it would do _wonders_ to fuck up some little boy's psyche by forcing him to sleep in a pink room," Ed deadpanned. Envy snorted loudly (although he had to admit, his chibi _did_ have a point...)

"Ne, 'O chibi-san, I think you're taking this just a _little_ too seriously…"

"Well _you're_ not taking this seriously _at all!_" Ed shot back, dropping another slip of paper back onto the tabletop.

"And besides…" he paused, waiting until his had Envy's undivided attention once more. He sniffed softly, a helpless expression fixating itself on his features.

"…It matters to _me_."

Envy was able to hold his stoic expression for a respectable five minutes before he cracked with a heavy, grievous sigh at the sound of a pathetic whimper escaping Ed's lips. _'That is _so_ not fair…'_

"Okay, okay, calm down, Edo," Envy murmured, closing his eyes before opening them again to gaze wearily at his chibi.

"Just… go through the options again…" Ed raised an eyebrow, dropping the innocent act entirely.

"What; you weren't listening the first _ten times?"_ Ed asked suspiciously. Envy hurriedly raised his hands, shaking his head rapidly. Ed narrowed his eyes slightly, but slowly nodded.

The blonde quickly sorted the many colors somewhat; so that they were all grouped together by their relative color.

Edward had been at this for hours, now. Roy and Hughes had come over before to help them completely clear out what had used to be referred to by Ed and Envy as 'the guest bedroom' (though it was used for storage more than anything) so that they could convert it to be the baby's room; it was also convenient that the room was located right across the hall.

Although it had taken an intense discussion about the baby's health, a threat of a tripled workload when he returned to work and some bribery on Envy's behalf, Roy, Hughes and Envy had finally persuaded Ed to promise that he would not attempt to help with the paint job; in return, the three promised that they would abide _exactly _by Ed's final decision as well-- this seemed to satisfy the chibi.

"Alright… there's a lotta different shades of red…"

"Nah."

"Orange--"

"Nuh uh."

"Yellow?"

"No."

"…Green."

"Hmmm… well, actually, no."

"…Blue--"

"Is definitely too boyish."

"_Purple?"_

"Nope."

"…_Pink?"_

"Too girly."

"…White."

"No... Besides, that not really a _color_, it's a _tone_," Envy replied, sounding offended, as if the offer implied that he wasn't aware of the technicality.

Raking his fingers through his hair, Ed took a long, deep shaky breath in, willing himself not to reach out to strangle the Homunculus in front of him.

"Okay. Okay. Well, Envy, if you're so seemingly against all of these options, what do _you_ suggest we do?" Ed asked, his voice dangerously sweet.

"The sky," Envy replied off the bat with a casual shrug.

Ed blinked a few times, more than slightly taken aback.

"…When did you come up with that idea?" Ed asked quietly, golden eyes boring into violet ones curiously.

"After you went through the options the second time," Envy interrupted with a smirk. Ed's eyes widened, and he gape incredulously at the

"After the second… _**second** time? _If you got the idea way back then, why the fuck didn't you speak up before now?" Ed exploded, jumping to his feet and slamming his hands down on the table. Envy shrugged carelessly.

"Before, every time I tried to say something you'd just keep on talking, or yell at me for interrupting. 'Sides…" Envy grinned mischievously, and Ed immediately knew he wasn't going to like what the Sin was about to say next…

"It was funny."

Ed twitched visibly, but knew Envy couldn't possibly be finished yet. That statement hadn't pissed him off _too_ much more; he could've immediately expected that, coming from Envy. So it had to be something much, much worse than that; something that so simple that he had missed--

"…_Annnnd_ you never asked."

Twitch.

_Clang_

"**_Fuuuck!"_**

XxXxXxXxXx

Envy padded down the hallway, taking great care not to make a sound; as to keep from alerting his target of his unanticipated presence. Once he'd reached his destination (a.k.a. the wall separating the hallway from the kitchen) he peered around the doorway. A small half smile, half smirk tugged the corners of his lips upwards.

Nearly three weeks had passed since Ed had started using the excuse from work Brian had given him so long ago. Although Edward happened to be completely oblivious to the stark truth, not working for such an extended period off time had caused a great deal of change in the young blonde. The alchemist was just so used to spending all his time working on some project or going about a mission that he _just_ _could not stay still._

In the past, Envy would tease Ed whenever he cleaned without hesitation. However, as of late, whenever Ed would get up to clean something, the Sin would stay (quite surprisingly) quiet about it. What went completely unnoticed by the chibi was that Envy had realized that, in the span of those three weeks, it seemed that Ed's nesting urges had finally decided to kick in.

Envy quietly observed his lover as Ed struggled desperately not to let it show that he could barely sit down for a matter of minutes --unless, of course he was with his companion; then again, _that_ was on a different level entirely-- without itching to search for something to clean up.

Having had decided long ago that he really didn't want Ed to find a way to _permanently_ castrate him (as he _so_ often threatened), Envy kept quiet about his knowledge of the humorous effects of Edward Elric's domestication.

But even without Envy spreading the news, there _was_ someone else that knew about the strange changes in Edward's behavior-- the key factor that had started a camaraderie that _anyone_ would consider odd.

This new acquaintanceship would be the (almost warm) bond the Homunculus was beginning to form with the youngest Elric. Both Envy and Al took more than just a little amusement in Ed's new antics and had found that, at least in this regard, they could relate.

Hence the reason Envy was grinning from ear to ear as he watched the golden chibi washing the dishes-- though he'd never let the small blonde know he watched him whenever he thought he was alone (Envy had made sure Ed thought he was sleeping upstairs).

Envy heard the gentle _clink_ of metal on porcelain as the blonde teen cautiously washed the dishes. Ed had pulled his hair back into a messy ponytail to keep it from getting in the way. He was so completely absorbed in the task of hand that he did not hear the Sin slowly sneaking up behind him. He'd just lifted another plate out of the sink filled with warm, soapy water when Envy snaked an arm around his waist.

Ed gasped and gave a start, so startled the dish managed to slip from his grasp. Envy's other hand readily caught it, grinning at Ed's bewildered expression and lazily dropping it back into the basin-- water sloshed up against the sides of the sink, dripping down the front of the counter.

"Envy, what the fuck are you _doing_?" Ed hissed, blushing furiously while he tried to pry Envy's hand from his waist. Envy's other arm wrapped defiantly across his chest and brought the humiliated blonde closer. Ed's struggles gradually ceased in response to the gentle nips Envy placed strategically to the back of his neck. He sighed heavily, pushing his hair to the side and tilting his head back in resignation to allow better across to the sensitive area Envy's lips were seeking.

"Mmm… you're not gonna get off _that_ easily, y'know," Ed mumbled, though by this point he'd given up the battle of keeping his eyes open long ago. Envy chuckled softly before turning the golden chibi around; pinning him against the front of the sink and pressing their lips together hotly.

Ed moaned loudly into his mouth, moving his hands to Envy's shoulders for support. Water-sick fingers massaged the back of Envy's neck, sending a pleasant shiver down his spine.

Finally they broke apart, leaving Ed gasping and Envy smirking triumphantly.

"Quite the contrary, Edo-- I _know_ I can," Envy purred teasingly. Ed snorted and rolled his eyes, turning back to return to the dishes-- but not without Envy noticing the small smirk playing on Ed's lips.

"In any case, what I _really_ wanna know is exactly what the fuck you were doing sneaking up on me like that; you told me you were gonna take a nap," Ed reminded Envy accusingly, lifting another dish out of the sudsy water and glancing back at the Homunculus questioningly. Envy shrugged slightly.

"I got bored."

"…Sooo you decide to stalk me for entertainment?" Ed deadpanned; wiping the dish dry with a cloth before setting it aside on the stack of dishes already cleaned.

"Hey-- it's not you don't enjoy it… you think it's kinky, don't you?" Envy asked slyly. Ed's eyes widened and he quickly shook his head; his rapidly growing blush, however, told a different story.

"Well aren't _you_ just the kinkiest, sexiest little chibi I ever did see?" Envy cackled, embracing the spluttering Ed happily.

"_WHO YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE—"_ Ed's angry rant was subdued by a sudden gasp that escaped his throat when Envy bit his shoulder a little harder than he normally would.

"Ne, sorry Edo; you're making me horny," Envy muttered against Ed's skin. Ed tensed, and weakly tried to pull away from the embrace.

"E-Envy, st…stop it…" Ed gulped, hating the way he stuttered.

"But the _dishes_ don't need you; _I_ do!" Envy complained, a pout starting to become evident on his features. Ed sighed softly, and turned back around to his sulking lover.

Envy blinked in surprise when Ed's arms encircled his neck and pulled his head lower so Ed could pull him into a (surprisingly raunchy) kiss. Ed's fingers trailed through the Homunculus' long, emerald hair, leaving wet trails where they touched. Envy leaned closer to deepen their kiss… before Ed abruptly turned away, leaving him blinking in confusion as his blonde returned to the chore.

"Go find something else to do," Ed commanded as he refilled the now-empty basin with water once again. Envy's jaw dropped, and he stared at the young alchemist incredulously.

"_Whaa--?_ But O' chibi-san," Envy whined, tugging on Ed's braid when the teen didn't even bother to turn around, yet still, there was no response.

With an impatient growl Envy finally gave up trying to win Ed's attention back, crossing his arms in a huff; if there was _one thing_ that Envy hated most of all, it was being _ignored_.

Ed mentally sighed in relief when there was no further whining coming from his lover-- to be honest he was pretty sure he might have cracked if Envy hadn't shut up just then.

Five minutes of well-earned silence (on Edward's behalf) passed with Envy glowering at the dry stack of dishes and Ed quietly cleaning them.

"…_Dammnit_, Edo; I'm s_ooo_ _bored…_ its unbe-_fucking_-lievable," Envy finally groaned.

"Well you're in luck, then; I'm finished," Ed replied easily, placing the last plate onto the stack and shaking his hands of excess water.

"…Already?" Envy blinked, sounding confused. Ed grabbed a dry hand towel before sending Envy a blank look.

"If you would have actually left me _alone_, it's _quite possible _that I would have _finished_ _faster,_" Ed said between gritted teeth, busy making sure his automail arm was completely dry.

"Aww, I'm sorry, chibi-chan; is there anything I could do to make it up to you?" Envy asked sarcastically. Ed stared at him before a slow smirk spread across his lips.

"How _kind_ of you to ask, as a matter of fact, yes there _is_," Edward said sweetly. Envy blinked at these unexpected words.

"Say what?"

"You can put away all these dishes," Ed stated, although Envy didn't miss the commanding tone in his voice.

"Have fun," Ed called, sashaying out of the room, leaving a bewildered Sin staring after him. After a minute, Envy deemed it safe to stare incredulously at the dishes on the counter. His eyes narrowed toward the innocent stack of plates.

"Why are _you_ getting all the attention-- he's not _your_ lover, he's _mine_."

XxXxXxXxXx

_Ring…ring_

Silence.

_Ring…ring_

"Mmm… Envy?"

_Ring…ring_

"_Whaaaaaat?"_

_Ring…ring_

"It's the phone…"

_Ring…ring_

"…I _know_ it's the phone, Ed. Why don't you pick it up?"

_Ring…ring_

"…"

"…"

"…Don't wanna…"

_Ring…ring_

"Fuck you," Envy grumbled and, with a sigh, he flopped onto his stomach, blindly reaching out to grope for the phone on the table nearby.

"'Lo?" Envy greeted carelessly before yawning loudly into the mouthpiece; he was treated with a dirty look sent from the sleepy blonde, pointed at the rude greeting.

Envy listened for a few moments before making an affirmative noise in his throat, pausing for a moment as he listened more intently.

"Who'sit?" Ed asked groggily, stringing his syllables together so that his sentence was nearly incoherent.

"It's the she-devil," Envy muttered as he shoved the phone into Ed's grasp. Ed rolled his eyes –too tired to retort– and lifted the phones to his ear.

"Hey… Winry? Yeah… it's me-- what's up?" Ed winced at the loud, cheerful voice emitted through the speaker.

"What; you are? When?" Ed exclaimed suddenly; voice cracking slightly. Envy raised an eyebrow in response to seeing Ed's eyes widen as much as they could in his semi-conscious state.

"No! Not at all; really, it's not a problem… no, we'd be happy to have you," Ed said hastily, flashing a helpless expression toward Envy.

"Alright… guess I'll be seeing you 'round five, then, 'kay? 'Kay… Bye." 

Ed reached over to replace the phone on its base; Envy only just noticed the sudden pallor of Ed's expression, and the recently exchanged conversation finally managed to click in his mind.

"You _so_ did not just do what I think you did…"

"…Please tell me I didn't…"

XxXxXxXxXx

"_Edward_, it's _so_ good to _see_ you!" Winry exclaimed happily, dropping her bag and launching toward the bewildered State alchemist at what would be neck breaking speed, nearly toppling the smaller blonde over. Her companion sighed (although he was nevertheless amused) and leaned down to pick up the fallen suitcase.

"Hey, Alphonse," Envy greeted from behind his, as of now, captive chibi.

"Hello, Envy," Al replied with a warm smile, genuinely happy to see the Homunculus.

"How've things been in the boondocks?" Envy asked, watching Ed struggling to break away from Winry's tight embrace with mild interest.

"Mmm, it's been pretty quiet in Rizembool… nothing too interesting; all the action is here with you guys," Al laughed.

"Yeah; I'll bet," Envy snorted.

"Geez, Ed; I _never_ see you anymore, now that you don't go about breaking your automail every other week," Winry pouted, crossing her arms. Ed was about to counter the hidden accusation defensively, but instead he paused, cracking a grin as her words sank in.

"Heh; if I didn't know any better, I'd say that was a _complaint_, Winry Rockbell," Ed said slyly.

"Don't you get any ideas, you alchemy-Otaku; it's not like I _enjoyed_ having to pull all-nighters for you every time you came around," Winry retorted. Ed rolled his eyes playfully and turned away to greet his brother happily.

Winry's gaze slowly traveled around the familiar hallway, taking everything in. Suddenly she frowned, obviously confused about something. Envy watched her eyes narrow in concentration before she blinked and turned back to face Envy in finality.

"Is it just me, or is really, _really_ clean in here?" She asked dubiously. She was rewarded with a snickering Envy and Alphonse along with a furiously blushing Edward.

"Ah, a-anyways, what brought you two around to visit?" Ed interjected before he actually had to explain anything to his friend. Both Al and Winry broke out into bright smiles.

"We wanted to help you get ready for the baby," Winry said enthusiastically with Al nodding his assent.

"Is there anything else you need to do that we could help with?" Al asked earnestly.

Envy and Ed exchanged a quick glance.

"Um, let's see… well, we've still gotta put together the furniture, right? Isn't it just sitting in boxes outside the baby's room?" Ed asked Envy, who nodded.

"Yup. Roy and Hughes already volunteered to help paint, so that job's been taken… oh… and didn't that creepy, family-obsessed guy's wife mention we still had to go shopping for clothes 'n stuff?" Envy reminded. Ed's eyes widened.

"Oh yeah! We still have to go shopping for clothes and toys and things to decorate the room… sheesh, we still have more stuff to do than I thought," Ed muttered. The golden chibi turned from Envy to face their two guests.

"So… do y'think you'd be up for shop—"

"_Yes!"_

"_Yeah!"_

"Ne…I think they just might like that idea, Edo…"

"No, y'don't say…"

XxXxXxXxXx

"Winry, put it back!"

"No way; it's adorable!" Winry yelled, clutching the small dress to her chest defensively.

"You're just jealous 'cause I have better taste in clothes than you!" She sniffed.

"Ah, Winry? I think Al's got a point… maybe you should give the "it's-definitely-gonna-be-a-girl" obsession a rest," Ed said cautiously, trying to reason with the fiery girl.

"Ha! See? Even _Nii-san_ think's it's gonna be a boy!" Al exclaimed victoriously.

"Hah? Now _wait_ just a second, Al; I never said that--"

"Exactly! He thinks it's gonna be a girl, too!"

"_Arrrgh!"_

Envy calmly steered the shopping wagon ahead of the three bickering friends, blocking the argument from his head; by this point, he'd found it was best not to interfere a _long_ time ago.

"Ne, O' chibi-san; how much more time do we have to do this?" Envy intervened, glancing back to the seething blonde curiously. Ed met his gaze, and frowned.

"Well, _Envy_, it depends on how much longer these two decide to keep on fighting," Ed sighed. Envy nodded curtly before turning his gaze to their guests.

"Alright, then; shut up and get some actual business done so we can get the fuck outta here," he said nonchalantly; he was rewarded with a rather intimate encounter with Winry's wrench.

Winry and Al continued to walk ahead; dragging a mildly concerned Ed with them as they indifferently passed the Homunculus doubled over in pain, clutching his abused head.

After a few moments had passed the androgynous Sin had caught up with them, glowering murderously at the huffy mechanic's back.

It had taken a long time, but Al and Winry had been able to convince the blonde to come out shopping with them the very next day. So far they had managed to keep anyone from questioning Ed's gender by having the alchemist wear his hair down, along with just a plain T-shirt and pants.

Of course, this didn't mean Ed was happy about his predicament. No, the Fullmetal Alchemist was _not_ _happy_ about the circumstance-- he kept toying with his hair, obviously uncomfortable about wearing it down in public.

Al's wandering eyes had apparently caught something of interest, for the brunette stopped in his tracks, thus bringing both blondes to a halt as well.

"Hey, Nii-san, what do you think of this?" Al asked with a teasing grin as he lifted a misplaced maternity dress off a random rack they were passing. An angry blush rushed to Edward's face, and he spluttered incoherently for a moment, eventually settling for a disturbed glare.

"…Does anyone else find anything _wrong_ with that image?" He asked between clenched teeth, turning his glare to the snickering Homunculus at his side.

"Actually…" Winry began, gazing at Ed and blinking thoughtfully. Ed's eyes widened.

"_Please don't say a word,_" The blonde alchemist begged; his expression turning to one of pure horror.

Al, Winry and Envy exchanged amused glances (though, admittedly, Envy's gave away that fact that he found there was more sadistic pleasure in the thought rather than entertainment) before bursting out in hysterical laughing.

Only just realizing they had been joking, Ed's horror-struck features formed a pout, and he crossed his arms.

"That's _not_ funny," he grumbled as he turned his head away, slightly flushed.

"I beg to differ," Envy snickered, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. Suddenly Ed found himself pulled close against the Homunculus.

"I also find the idea _incredibly_ kinky; the thought is a turn on like you wouldn't _believe_," he whispered discreetly into Ed's ear, running his hands down Ed's sides. Ed gaped at his smirking lover, golden eyes wide with indignation.

"Mmm? Is something wrong, Nii-san?" Al asked his flushed brother worriedly, realizing that he and Winry had walked ahead of the couple whom had long since stopped in their tracks.

"I-it's, uh, it's nothing of your… concern, Al," Ed stuttered nervously as he hastily fumbled for the words of choice, shooting a glare into laughing violet eyes once Al's questioning eyes had moved away from him.

Envy made to follow after Alphonse and Winry, but was stopped from any further movement when Ed grabbed his wrist. He glanced at the blonde inquisitively and raised an eyebrow at Ed's half-lidded gaze.

"If it's _that_ much of a turn on for ya, I'll consider it," Ed purred in the sultriest tone Envy had heard coming from him in the past three months. With a sly wink and a short peck on the lips Ed hurried off to talk to his brother. Envy blinked, and, with a sigh slowly started off after his chibi, trying his very best not to think about how damn sexy Ed could actually be, even when pregnant…

…Dammnit-- too late.

At last, after an excruciatingly long twenty minutes, Winry announced that they were finished, and lead the way to the cashier to pay.

"Are you all together?" The clerk asked pleasantly, intrigued by the diverse-looking group.

"Yeah," Al replied, helping the woman put everything onto the counter; he was rewarded with a smile and a mildly surprised "thank you."

As she finished ringing everything up, her gaze fell on Edward who was currently staring longingly out the window of the shop.

"Oh-- is all of this stuff for you, Miss?" She asked, nodding at him. Envy tapped him on the shoulder when he didn't respond, and his golden eyes met hers.

"Sorry; what'd you say?"

"This is all for your baby, right?" She repeated. He slowly nodded, not understanding why Winry and Al were inconspicuously trying to stifle laughter.

"Well, congratulations to you and your partner, Little Missy," she called after them happily as they walked out the door.

"Gosh, they just keep getting younger and younger," she said conversationally to another clerk, who nodded her assent as they watched them rush off; only just noticing the small "girl's" (more-than-slightly murderous) expression.

"At least she looks likes she in good hands," she murmured to herself, raising an eyebrow at the strange scene the group was providing outside-- the person she _still_ wasn't sure whether to decide if it was a girl or a boy restraining the pregnant, ranting teenager while the other two accompanying them laughed.

XxXxXxXxXx

"_Finally_!" Ed gasped, dropping the many shopping bags on the floor and plopping down on the couch. Envy followed suit; letting the bags fall from his arms and settling alongside the exhausted blonde.

"It's a wonder you can keep things so tidy here if that's the way you leave things around," Winry sighed exasperatedly, shaking her head toward the lounging duo.

"Mmm… you say something', Win?" Ed asked, lazily sprawling out across Envy's lap. Winry rolled her eyes before stomping out of the room, carrying her many bags with her.

"Never underestimate the power of hormones," Al said slyly, grinning broadly as he picked up both his Ed's and Envy's bags, rushing out of the room before his hot-headed brother had a chance to process the hidden message.

"Little brothers…" Ed muttered under his breath. He shrugged to himself and sighed heavily, toying absentmindedly at a loose strand of Envy's hair. The two remained quiet for a little bit, listening to the sounds of the friends arguing playfully upstairs.

"Meh; they make a good couple," Envy blurted out randomly. Ed closed his eyes and smiled.

"Yeah, they do."

They exchanged a glance before breaking out in smirks.

"Al's just gonna go through _hell_ with her," Ed snickered, Envy nodding in agreement.

Envy was just about to reply vocally when, out of nowhere, a book was thrown at them, hitting him square on the back of his head.

"Oops-- sorry, Envy!" Winry said, sweatdropping at the sight of the Homunculus holding his head, clearly in pain.

"Winry, what is this?" Ed asked, picking up the fallen book that now lay on the floor by his feet. Winry walked over behind the couch and plucked it out of Ed's grasp.

"It's a book of baby names; it caught my eye when we were passing the story books. I bought it myself as a present for the two of you," she said, smiling.

"Thanks, Winry," he said, sounding vaguely surprised by the kind gesture. As she walked off he started skimming through the--

"Hey, waitaminute-- _Winry, these are all **girls'** names!"_

XxXxXxXxXx

"Renee?"

"No way, that sounds too old…"

"Michelle?"

"Hmm… I dunno."

"Okay," Ed said, putting a small mark next to the name so that he'd now to come back to it later; he'd figured out by the twentieth name that anything that didn't immediately go rejected by Envy –for some reason or another– was one that caught his interest (though apparently he didn't want to admit it).

"Mmm… Ka…thrine?" Ed asked, yawning mid-name. Envy looked at the blonde from the corner of his eye and saw him sleepily rubbing his eyes.

"Ne, Edo, we can come back to this tomorrow-- it's already really late," Envy murmured, running his fingers through Ed's long, golden hair. Ed nodded, and set the book aside on the night-table; turning off the light and lying down with a sigh.

Envy shifted slightly so Ed was nestled up right against him. Immediately it was quiet. At once Envy knew Ed had to be thinking about something, because even Edward didn't usually fall asleep _quite_ that fast.

"Hey, Envy?" Ed started at last, breaking the silence.

"Hmm?"

Ed turned his head so he was looking directly into Envy's face.

"Be honest with me: do you think you're ready for this kid? " Ed asked softly, looking utterly serious.

Envy averted his gaze from Ed's piercing eyes for a few moments, thinking carefully. Finally, his eyes met Ed's once more, and he smiled slightly.

"Not in the least."

There was a long silence.

"Good; neither am I."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: **Stares blankly** That was so short…

Joh: Nee-san, you did the best you could.

Jessie: So… short.

Joh: **Sighs** Jessie…

Jessie: **Teary eyed** I'm sooo sorry! That was _in no way_ long enough of a chappie for a month-long break!

Joh: **Shakes head** I'm not getting into this…

Jessie: Please don't hate me; I _totally_ know what's gonna happen next, so don't worry! There will _not_ be another huge wait like that!

Joh: Ano, Sis, you've got a _lot_ of responding to do…

Jessie: **Flips out** Oh my God, I got _so_ many freakin' reviews; still can't believe it's over 200…

Joh: I'm going to sleep now.

Jessie: …

DarkNinjaBunneh: Aw, but "squee-ing" is so much fun!

cuylerjade: Yosh; this chapter was fluffy! **Wink **Yup; names came into play this chappie! S'aank you for your input of your preference!

HolyMistress: **Gasps and glomps all the plushies** _Squee Thank yoooou!_ I hope you enjoyed your shower scene-- I just couldn't resist the angst! Kodak moments are da bomb. I love writing fluff… hooray for your cousin! **Huggles** Glad you liked the chapter, and I like candy, too! **Throws tons of candy for you**

An Angel Flying with broken...: Thanks! I'm glad you think so!

aruslym: Thanks for da input-- biased answer, much? **Dies laughing**

siverrain: **Blushes** I'm happy you like it so much! Thanks a _lot_ for your input; it means a lot to me that people actually read my notes… XD Yeaaah. SURPRISE, ENVY AND EDO! **Throws sparkles**

FISHTaNK the Evil Fangirl: Oh, okay-- just wondering if there were two "Stephs" out there 3 Shaw, Wrath is sooo cute! **Hands you Wrath plushie** Thanks for reviewing! Be happy!

Solo Maxwell-Yamato: **Bakes huge batch of chocolate chip cookies** I love spoiling you in my review responses; it makes me happy! **Grins **N'ways, glad you enjoyed the chappie. Ed and Izumi equal baaad things… **Cuddles** S'aank you for da review!

NightPredator: Heh; Alu _does_ have a wittle crush! **Starry eyed** He is just _too_ cute. Oh; thanks for your input! We'll see what happens!

Shimoariku: Thanks for telling me your preferences! Wrath is a mischievous little guy; I can totally see where you're comin' from! Shaw, the chapter was long because I wasn't gonna update for a while… but I have now! Thanks for da review and all your kind comments!

Kaoru Gal: Aw, somebody needs a huuuug! **Kisses** My poor indecisive twiny! It's okay; I know of your Depressed!Edo fetish XD It's all good! I love you sooo much!

Forever Yours Zana: **Obsesses over Envy plushie while eating chocolates** I think I adore you. Yes, I figured a hormonal, pregnant Ed was best suited to go with the classic, "OMG, you threw me a baby shower-- I love you guys!" reaction. HavocxFuery rocks! As you said--"SPREAD THE LUFF!" I am SO happy you like da fic so much! Thanks very much for your gender preferences input! I love you, too! **Huggles**

loathed wolf spirit: Poor, poor Envy… he suffers because Ed suffers. N'ways, thank you for responding and telling me what you're hopin' for! Lust and Wrath rock! Hurray for spontaneous appearances! Whoot!

Sunako Kanzaki: I updated… I know it's not all that soon, but I did, and that's what counts, ne? Sorry for da wait… Glad you liked it-- hope you liked this chappie, too!!

Light-Hideko: Honestly, Izumi scares me to death… I also applaud Envy's braveness; see, he really _will_ do anything for his chibi! Oh, God; if Armstrong had showed up… **Shudder** Don't wanna think 'bout it. **Wide eyed** You're serious about having made a pic for me? **Tears** There really are nice people out there! I love you. S'aank yoooou! (Yeah, it's the thought that counts!)

hyperdude: 1.) I love your user name!!! 2.) Random popping up of Homunculi is _really_ fun to write! 3.) Glad you liked the chapter, hope you liked this one, too.

darkangel36: Hurray HavocxFuery! **Giggles **Yup; they're almost parents! I'm glad you thought it was a good baby shower-- hurray for unexpected visiting Homunculi!

Hachikara-chan: Goth baby… **Rolling on da floor laughing** Awesome. Thanks for your input for the gender preferences! Hope you're still enjoying the ficcy!

envy's flame: Thanks for telling me what you're looking forward to! Very funny thought, indeed! **Laughs** Here's the next chapter; I am _so_ sorry for the huge wait… Yay, I have a loyal fan! **Huggles**

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: Edvy moments CUTENESS! Glad you like it!

frogger666: Envy a daddy… **Giggles** That is such a strange thought! I'm so sorry the wait was so long… forgive me? **Puppy dog expression**

wolf-deamon333: Thank you for telling' me your preference for the baby! Shaw… Izumi is horrfying… **Shudders**

IshizuWolfRider: **Blushes** I'm so happy you like it! Very relieved to hear you think it's in character (especially with the couple)! Thanks for giving me an idea of your preference!

SoulfulZen: Nah, Lust was just accompanying Wrath; I didn't mean to put her in as da mother figure… **Shrugs** Oh well! S'aank you for your comments, and I hope you continue to think my writing's good! Ah-- and thank you for sharing your ideas for the baby with me!

ryougabriellucile: Thank you VERY much for telling me what you think the baby should look like 'n stuff!

Strlight99: "Huggles" rocks my socks! You wanna see our big, strong Homunculus cry? …I think you might've just inspired me… **Winks** S'aank you! Thanks for tellin' me what gender ya want the baby to be!

Me And My God Complex: Glad ya thought so! Hope this chappie was good, too!

RandomlyYours: **Spazzes** Omg, you used my "Onii-chan's" favie word! **Dies laughing** "Preggers;" hahahahaha! Shaw, it's Ed's turn to get knocked up! Envy needs a freakin' break!

Jedi Mistress 1990: **Blinks before smiling happily** I'm so glad my ficcy made an exception for ya; mpreg rocks! I know you'll eventually get da courage! And if ya need help, you can ask me! **Hands you requested Neji plushie and tons of Pocky** Thank you sooo much!

Genki-angel-chan: I'm happy you like it, and think it's cute! Oh, and thanks for telling me your gender preference for the baby!

Alchemist of the Flame: Thanks for answering my note about what gender you want the baby! Hahaha, poor Winry… guess you don't like her much, huh? Then again, she terrifies me, so… **Sweatdrops** Uh, yeah. Thanks for reviewing!

ArtemisRoseShadow: **Blushes happily** I love you, too! Thanks for da review!

Zoorzh: Ah, of _course_ I can't resist the puppy dog face of a reviewer! Here's your update (sorry it took for friggin' long) and I hope you enjoy it! You inspired me when you mentioned explaining how Envy 'n Edo got together… so I might just do that! Thank you so much for puttin' me on your favies; I feel so loved!

Mana-san: Yes, we _do_ need Kodak… Hahaha! A twist would be crazy… **Starts giggling** Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

Kaori Shie: Kay, first off I wanna thank you for giving me such an in depth explanation of what you're lookin' forward to! Y'also gave me a bit of inspiration; thank you for that, too! The Colonel, making bets? Hmmm… maaaybe… maaaybe not! **Winks** Thanks for da review!

sprinkle-chan: Squee! I'm happy my chappie made ya happy! And now I've updated (though I know it's been a while… sorry!) **Smiles sheepishly**

Pyralis Ambika: I _died_ laughing when I read your review! -"Hugs a disturbed Envy"- I'm glad you like fluff, 'cause I do, too! S'aank you for telling me what preference you have for the baby's gender 'n all!

TOOL.2: Thank you for telling me what you're looking forward to when the baby arrives! Aww, Edo 'n Envy are gonna be parents! **Starry eyed**

MysticMaiden 18: Thanks for telling me what your preference is for the baby! And thank you so much for reviewing! **Smiles**

(Thank you all for being so incredibly patient as I went through my extreme period of writer's block! I know exactly what follows this chapter, so don't worry; I'm probably gonna be writing like crazy! Chocolate and ice cream sundaes to all reviewers! Please review! Tood-lee-oodles!


	11. Family Issues

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist. But Envy _totally _owns Ed!

(Envy: Ya can't spell "raped" without spellin' "Ed!" Get o'er here, O 'chibi-san!

Ed: **Runs**)

Jessie: Ain't it da truth?

Joh: **Sniggers**

Jessie: I'm updating as fast as possible, so I feel good! I'm also pretty happy with the outcome of this chapter cuz I kept rewriting it and finally settled on this! 

Joh: Big toe!

Jessie: …

Joh: **Rolling around on the floor laughing her head off**

Jessie: **Twitches **Don't even ask…

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"Ne, ne; Edo, remember this?"

Ed blinked in surprise when a photograph narrowly missed his nose as it was showed into his face. He smiled softly in recognition when he'd studied it for a moment.

"Yes, Envy; how could I forget?" Ed replied, holding the picture carefully between two automail fingers.

It seemed as if the Homunculus had gotten into the photo albums; all day long Envy had kept himself busy by forcing pictures into Ed's face at random intervals. He was obviously amused by the memories each one brought.

This particular one, however, Ed was rather fond of.

There he was, looking utterly baffled, sitting in Envy's lap while Envy smirked up into the camera; he'd taken it himself. Funny, how your perspective of someone can change entirely from just a simple meeting…

**Flashback**

"I _still _don't even know how the hell you managed to get me to come here…" Ed grumbled, crossing his arms irritably across his chest as he narrowed his eyes suspiciously at his companion across the table.

"I asked you to. And I dare say, Edo, you sounded _quite_ interested," Envy replied, smiling smugly.

"Wh-what are you talking about?" Ed exploded, blushing furiously.

"You told me you'd give me some information on the Philosopher's Stone; of course I'd come!" Ed accused angrily; the volume of his voice earned himself the attention of a few other customers sitting in the small café.

"Detail, details," Envy countered airily. He leaned closer toward Edward across the table, gazing at him intently.

"But that's so _boring_… don't you agree? I'd _much_ rather talk about other things…"

"Like _what_? What could _we_ possibly talk about, huh?" Ed asked with a snort. With a sigh he closed his eyes and leaned back –arms still firmly crossed– in a huff.

His eyes snapped open once more, however, when he felt someone perch precautiously on the very edge of his seat. He turned his head to stare at a broadly grinning Envy whom he noticed, for the first time, was holding a camera.

"Ne, chibi, lemme take our picture?"

"_Wha_-- N-no way!"

"Why the hell nooot?" The Homunculus whined, pouting cutely.

"'Cause--! …'Cause I don't like you!" Ed snapped childishly.

"But _I_ like _you!"_

"_Hah!_ _That's _a laugh-- since _when_? As far as I'm aware, you _hate_ me!"

"Says who?"

_"You_ did!" Ed shouted in exasperation.

Envy blinked, seemingly at a loss for words. Ed closed his eyes once more-- this time in relief.

"…I wasn't _serious_…"

To put it simply, Ed cracked.

"_What the hell is wrong with you?_ Why the fuck did ya wanna see me? Why aren't you trying to _kill _me?_ Why are you being so damn nice?"_ Ed howled.

"Geez; could ya be any _louder?"_ Envy said sarcastically, sticking a finger in his ear for emphasis; completing disregarding Ed's previous statement.

"_That doesn't answer my question!"_ Ed ground out, slapping a hand to his forehead wearily.

"Honestly, I dunno _why_ I even bothered comin' here; I shoulda _known_ you weren't being serious…" Ed muttered, grabbing his cloak and moving to stand up.

He was interrupted, however, by a wrist grabbing his hand. With a yelp he fell backward as his wrist was pulled harshly from behind, ultimately landing on the androgynous Homunculus.

There was a click, a brief flash and a soft whirring sound as Envy snapped a picture. Ed blinked; an expression of pure bewilderment on his face.

All too suddenly he realized he was staring up into smirking violet eyes-- he hastily scrabbled out of Envy's lap, his face a dark crimson.

"You're fuckin' insane!" He hissed, turning to leave once more. However, he couldn't help but wonder about the uncharacteristic smile Envy had plastered onto his lips as he studied the developing picture he'd just taken.

**End Flashback**

Ed set the picture carefully on the stand next to the couch and opened his book once more, prepared to begin reading again... Of course, Envy wouldn't have it.

"Chibi, I found another now I like," Envy snickered, dropping a picture unceremoniously on top of Ed's book.

Ed stared down at it, trying to remember where _this_ could possibly be from. It was just him, from the shoulders up. He was very pale and wore an expression of pure terror, looking more than ready to faint.

"…I don't remember this," Ed said at last, raising an eyebrow at the shape shifter. Again, Envy snickered.

"Well of _course_ you wouldn't remember it; you passed clean out right after I took it. But I'll bet you remember the conversation that took place… remember the time I cured your paranoia of 'sharp, pointy objects?'" Envy teased. Ed's eyes widened.

"You took a _picture_ of me like that? Fuck, no!" Ed yelled, glaring at the Homunculus.

**Flashback**

"O' Chibi-san, I've made a decision," Envy announced as he jumped onto the windowsill to Edward's bedroom.

Ed gasped, nearly dropping the pen he was using so very carefully to draw a complicated-looking alchemical array. He jumped out of his seat, screaming at Envy for dropping in like this.

"--I swear, you're like a fucking _stalker_ or something," Ed finished, panting heavily after his rant.

"Yeah, okay, whatever," Envy said in a bored manner.

There was a brief pause as the two regarded each other.

"So… you must've dropped by for a reason. Whadya want?" Ed asked with a sigh of resignation; plunking back down onto his chair, never letting his gaze waver from the green-haired figure.

Lately the Homunculus had been popping up out of the blue more and more frequently. And, as much as Ed hated to admit it, he found he didn't hate the Sin's company so much, now -- as a matter of fact, he'd discovered Envy's company was relatively... pleasant, so long as he wasn't trying to kill him.

"The reason for my coming here is because I, out of the goodness of my heart—" (here he ignored the loud snort from the short blonde)—"—have decided to cure you of your paranoia of sharp, pointy objects, a.k.a _needles,_" Envy said proudly. Ed froze, letting his eyes travel back to the Homunculus at a painstakingly slow rate.

"And just… _how _do you expect to go about that?" Ed asked, rather nervously; obviously dreading the answer.

"Just listen…" Envy paused dramatically a slow, mischievous smile spreading across his lips.

"Getting a needle stuck into your wrist is _nothing_ comparing to having someone's dick shoved up your ass over and over again… if ya don't believe me, Edo, I'd be _more _than willing to give you an example," Envy purred.

The Sin sat back and patiently waited for the words to sink in. He grinned when he saw Ed's jaw go slack and slowly removed the camera he had hidden behind his back so he could quickly snap a photo.

He allowed himself a quick glance at the quickly appearing picture. Mission accomplished, Envy returned his gaze to the blonde to bid him farewell but instead ended up nearly tumbling backwards off of the window sill, howling with laughter when he realized the poor alchemist had keeled over in a dead faint.

**End Flashback**

"I still haven't forgiven you for that… I had a killer headache when I woke up," Ed muttered.

"Yeah, well it worked anyways, didn't it? You haven't spazzed out about having to get a needle ever since," Envy snickered, nipping Ed's ear affectionately.

"And besides… although I don't think you were _quite_ ready to believe me at first, you did eventually…after I showed you," Envy whispered into Ed's ear; he was rewarded with a not-so-gentle punch to the head with Ed's (right) fist. Still grinning, however, the Sin fled the room in search of more (hopefully amusing) photos.

It hadn't been more than a mere ten minutes before the Homunculus came bounding back into the room. The chibi closed his book again and rolled his eyes playfully when Envy plopped down next to him, holding just one more of the numerous photo albums scattered around the house.

However, Ed couldn't be sure as to just why Envy was smirking so deviously… _'Oh God, what'd he find _this _time…?'_

"Now weren't _you_ just the cutest little baby?" Envy teased, opening the book to point to a picture. Sure enough, there was a four year old Edward, coloring with crayons with his just-turned-three baby brother.

"Wh-where'd you find those? Hey, give them here!" Ed exclaimed; blushing deeply as he tried to reach for the book Envy was now holding over his head.

"Naaah, I wanna see some more," Envy grinned evilly. Still holding the small album over his head he turned the page, letting out a soft, mocking "aww" at the sight of a picture of baby-Edo sleeping soundly on a big, plushy chair.

Out of nowhere a loose picture slipped out of the album and onto the floor. Envy leant over to pick it up but froze when he caught sight of the actual picture. At once Ed noticed the sudden, uneasy silence.

"Envy?" He asked warily as he placed a hand on the Sin's back.

"Meh? Oh… sorry," Envy mumbled, carefully lifting the picture and placing it facedown on the photo album before wordlessly leaving the room. Immediately, Ed feared for the worst and hesitantly turned it over. He cursed softly and grimaced upon seeing it and hurriedly got up to follow his lover, calling after him nervously.

The picture fluttered to the floor once more, face side up this time-- revealing the picture of a brightly smiling Hohenheim holding a giggling Edward on his knee for the world to see.

XxXxXxXxXx

"Um… Envy?"

"…"

"Envyyyyy, c'mooon…"

"…"

Ed sighed in agitation, crossing his arms firmly.

"Okay, _fine._ Envy, _please_ stop ignoring me."

The blonde chibi sweatdropped as he was rewarded with a blank stare.

"…Oookay, actually that's kinda creepy…" At once Envy attention was turned from him once more. Ed felt a painful twang in his chest at the Sin's usual silence and knew he had to say something more.

"Envy, look, I'm sorry--"

"For what?" Envy interrupted in a quiet voice, speaking for the first time in over two hours; a new record for the Homunculus.

Ed winced at Envy's unusually cold tone but remained silent; he knew exactly what was bothering Homunculus but… he was still trying to deduct exactly what had happened himself.

"You shouldn't apologize if you don't know what you're apologizing for," Envy said at last in response to Ed's hesitation.

"I _do _know what I'm talking about!" Ed insisted, flushing angrily.

"I'm sure," Envy remarked sarcastically.

"No, really! Envy, I _know_… I _know_ that I broke my promise, but--"

"Exactly, Ed; you _promised_. And worst of all, I thought I could _trust_ you," Envy ground out between gritted teeth, his amethyst eyes narrowed angrily.

"You promised me didn't have any pictures of that _bastard_--"

"Envy, I _know_! I remember what I said! Please, just let me--"

"--You _swore_ you didn't have any reminders of him in this household--"

"Envy, I'm trying to _tell_ you, it isn't mi--"

"_**SHUT UP, ED!"**_ Envy finally roared, jumping to his feet, his eyes ablaze with furry

Ed faltered for a moment; opening his mouth to speak before closing it once more.

There was a long, painful silence, where the Homunculus stood over the stunned blonde sitting on the edge of the bed panting heavily, clenching and unclenching his fists as he tried to suppress his fury.

"…Why won't you listen?" Ed whispered, looking up at Envy; his golden eyes glistening with the stinging tears he was so desperately trying to blink back.

Without another word the Sin finally resorted to doing something he hadn't done in years; the Homunculus strode to the bedroom window, opened it, hooked his legs over the sill and, without another glance back toward the horror struck teenager, jumped out.

XxXxXxXxXx

_Envy,_

_One; don't panic if you can't find me, I'm fine. By the time you've picked up this note I've most likely arrived in Risembool. I just can't deal with your attitude right now. I hate to say it, but we've got a problem here-- Envy, if you can't trust me, I can't trust you. You have NO idea how much that hurts to say. I know what the circumstance looked like, but if you'd have given me the chance to explain, I could have. Surprisingly enough, I not really mad, although I DO wanna kill you for not believing me (if that made any sense). But I can't DAMN IT because that would put me in a REALLY difficult spot with the baby. I KNOW you'll be worried because the date is only a week and a half or so away, but I'll be back the day after tomorrow; Al's gonna accompany me._

_Love,_

_Ed_

_P.S: The album isn't mine its Al's._

XxXxXxXxXx

"I'm really sorry to drop in like this," Ed sighed, holding the front door open as Al followed him through into the house carrying his suitcase he had insisted on carrying.

"It's not a problem, Ed! Stop apologizing," Winry chided playfully, punching him lightly in the shoulder.

"'Sides, you never apologized in the past for dropping in on us with your automail –which I _slaved _over– broken to bits," Winry teased, attempting to pull the alchemist out of his slump. Ed snorted.

"Yeah, well that's only 'cause breaking my automail isn't a big deal; it wasn't like it was _troublesome_ or anything."

_SLAM_

"_SO, THAT'S THE THANKS I GET FOR WORKING OVERTIME EACH TIME YOU DROPPED BY OUTTA THE BLUE-- JUST SO YOU COULD GET BACK TO YOUR SUICIDE MISSION, PIPSQUEAK?"_

_WHAM_

"_WHO'S SO SMALL HE CAN ONLY BE SEEN BY AMOEBA?"_ (Pronounced A—me—bah)

_KA—BLAM_

"_SHUT UP! IF I AM TO STAY HERE, I WILL _NOT_ HAVE YOU TWO FIGHING THE WHOLE TIME; IS THAT CLEAR?"_ Izumi bellowed, glaring at the two teens with murder in her eyes.

""Y-yes ma'am," Ed and Winry replied meekly, sitting back down and slowly removing their hands from the abused table.

"That's better," Izumi said calmly, closing her eyes as she rested her head on her hand.

"So… would you care to tell me… exactly _why_ did you ask me to meet you at the Rockbell residence? I'm busy, as you very well--"

"Envy and I are fighting." Izumi's mouth snapped shut and her piercing glare turned to an expression of subtle concern.

"Fighting? What about?"

Ed's gaze dropped to his lap and he fell quiet; everyone's eyes were resting on him now-- the core of their argument was still unknown.

"…Hohenheim."

Both Alphonse and Izumi winced visibly; Winry and Pinkao looked on in confusion.

"Your dad? But why… why would _Envy_ have anything to with your--"

"Winry, drop it," Al hissed just low enough for Ed to miss. She turned to face him with a frown.

"But why would he--"

"_Drop it!"_ Winry's clear blue eyes widened slightly in surprise at the urgent impatience in Al's voice and looked away, upset that she hadn't perceived the implied message the first time.

"Why? What happened?" Izumi pressed, still staring intently at her student.

"…I just let him down…" Ed mumbled, lowering his head so that his eyes were hidden from view. After a moment Ed pushed his chair back and slowly got to his feet.

"I'm gonna go upstairs to lie down for a bit; the trip kinda wore me out," Ed said as he began toward the stairway. But when he'd reached the first step he hesitated, glancing back toward the table.

"Hey, Al; come here a sec?" Said boy immediately got up and approached his brother. Ed muttered something to the brunette and Al nodded, turning to move back to the table as the blonde proceeded up the steps.

"What was that about?" Winry asked once she'd heard the faint sound of a door closing.

"Hmm? Oh; he just wanted to tell me what he wanted for dinner," Al replied easily, smiling good-naturedly. However, no one missed the concern for his brother he was trying so hard to mask.

XxXxXxXxXx

**Flashback**

A soft whimper escaped the teen's lips as soft lips gently brushed against the very nape of his neck; he was rewarded with a low chuckle from the owner of those lips.

"Ngh..."

"Shh, don't move," Envy warned, stroking his fingers gently through Ed's bangs; brushing them aside so he could place a gentle kiss on the blonde's forehead.

"…'m, sorry," Ed managed to gasp, clenching and unclenching his hands into tight fists as he tried to stifle the pained gasps that threatened to escape his throat each time the body on top of his moved in the slightest.

"No, you're doing just fine," Envy murmured, smiling reassuringly at the trembling alchemist. There was a pause as the Sin waiting patiently for Ed's suppressed sobs and gasps to lessen so that he could speak coherently once more. At last, Envy saw golden eyes flutter open and focus on his face.

"Okay… 'm okay…" Ed whispered, blinking back the tears that obscured his vision of Envy's face. Envy offered him one last comforting smile before slowly moving in and out of Ed's body once more. After a few deeper thrusts Envy felt Ed stiffen before a long moan slipped through his lips.

"There?"

"Yeah, just… just move a little high--ahh…" Ed trailed off into another moan as Envy just brushed against the spot, sending tingles racing up his spine.

Heading his plead, Envy pulled Ed's hips higher and plunged deeply into the smaller body once more; he smirked at the loud gasp and wanton cry he extracted from the now shuddering blonde.

"Dammnit, Envy, go faster," Ed suddenly hissed, snaking his fingers through Envy's wild hair and dragging his head lower so he could crush their lips together passionately. Envy grinned against Ed's lips and kissed him just as fiercely before pulling back and gripping Ed's waist more tightly, picking up the pace just as his chibi had asked.

Ed let his head fall back with a whine, his mind empty of anything but the pleasure that coursed through his body each time Envy slammed into him, unconsciously raising his hips each time to increase the impact.

Envy gazed at the alchemist beneath him, soaking in Ed's expression; his golden eyes growing slightly out of focus and his mouth hanging slightly agape as he took in short, labored breaths. He leant down to lick away a bead of sweat that trickled down Ed's cheek and the blonde shuddered violently.

"Envy…" Ed mewled upon feeling the Sin's hand make contact with his shaft, teasing him until he couldn't take it anymore.

"_ENVY!" _Ed screamed, throwing his arms around the shape shifter's neck and clinging to him tightly as he came violently into Envy's hand, Envy releasing only a few seconds later, groaning his new lover's name.

Envy collapsed on top of Ed the second he pulled out from him, closing his eyes and allowing a lazy smile to spread across his lips. He could feel his body rise slightly each time Ed's chest rose in gasps.

"That was…" Ed seemed to be at a loss for words in his sleepy state.

"Incredible? Outstanding? Amazing?" Envy offered with a smug smirk.

"…Amazing," Ed replied decisively, grinning weakly at the Sin.

Envy slipped his arms around the chibi's waist and pulled him closer, running his fingers through Ed's sweat slicked hair.

"Mmm… Envy?" Ed murmured faintly

"Yeah, Edo?" Envy asked; blinking down at the teenager quickly drifting off.

"…Love you."

The Homunculus could've sworn his heart had skipped a beat just then with those nearly inaudible words; he nearly broke out into a grin but managed to keep it to a mere smile. He watched Ed fondly as his golden orbs were obscured from his view as his eyes closed and he dozed off –without bothering to wait for a reply– pressed flush up against his chest.

"…I love you, too, Edward," Envy finally replied, but only when the chibi had long since fallen asleep.

**End Flashback**

"Nii-san?"

Ed gave a slight start as he was shaken from his reminiscence by the abrupt sound of the youngest Elric's voice. His golden eyes fell upon hearing the doorway, where Alphonse stood; still holding the door knob.

"Hey there, Al," Ed greeted, offering a half-hearted smile.

"Can I come in?"

"Of course! What did you expect?" Ed laughed motioning for the younger alchemist to enter. With a smile, Al closed the door behind himself before settling down beside the blonde.

"So… are they all gone?"

"Yep; I asked Izumi and Pinako to pick up the stuff for dinner and sent Winry out to pick up something for dessert; I told them I'd keep you company."

"Thanks, Al," Ed said gratefully, smiling at his brother.

Al smiled back gently, pretending he didn't notice how forced Ed's smile look, or how Ed's eyes were too bright; as if he didn't notice the shuddering, silent sobs that racked his brother's body as he reached over to hold him close…

No; Alphonse Elric knew his brother all too well.

And that's why he remained utterly silent as his older brother finally let himself cry into Al's lap; clutching his shirt in both fists.

"Dammnit, Al, what am I gonna _do?_"Ed choked out, bringing his glistening golden eyes to meet Al's warm, honey ones.

"It'll be okay, Nii-san…" Al murmured, unconsciously running his hand up and down Ed's back in an attempt to soothe him. In a flash his brother's expression went from miserable to furious.

"And what the hell makes ya say that, Al? He _hates_ me right now; you know how he gets when dad's name comes up. He probably doesn't even _care_ where I--"

"Edward. He _loves_ you."

The disgruntled chibi fell silent at the calmly spoken words, blinking slowly as they registered. He glanced away from Al wordlessly.

"…Yeah, I know," Ed murmured at last, inwardly cursing the way his voice wavered as tears swarmed before his vision once more.

"I left him a note… I-I told him I wasn't a-angry…"

"You're not angry, Ed. You're hurt; there's a difference. Don't worry, you're not lying," Al interrupted smoothly-- Ed couldn't believe how easily Al could catch on to his concerns.

"But I--" Ed cut off with a wince, griping Al's shirt subconsciously.

"Nii-san? What is it?" Al asked immediately, not missing the expression of pain that had flashed across Ed's face. Ed offered Al a small, reassuring smile.

"It's nothing, Al… the baby just tends to move a lot whenever I get stressed," Ed assured his brother, starting to move a hand to his stomach. Al's hand reached the bump first, however, and he slowly traced gentle circles on the surface.

"Hey little guy, everything's okay," Al cooed, his words earning a blush from the blonde (yes, the brunette was _still_ very much intent on insisting the baby would be a boy just as long as Winry insisted it _had_ to be a girl). Al glanced up at Ed with a worried frown.

"Nii-san, you're really tense… does it hurt?" Al asked quietly, his eyes darting back and forth, unsure whether to rest on Ed's face or his belly. Ed began to shake his head but instead, knowing that it would be no use and Al would immediately spot the lie, slowly nodded.

"Al, to be honest, it's never been this bad before…" Ed said, forcing himself to take a deep breath and let it out in a shuddering sigh. When he felt pain rip suddenly through his abdomen again he grimaced and bit his lower lip, holding back a small noise of pain; yep, that last bit of pain had been enough to confirm his worst fears…

When he saw the expression of fear just begin to rise to Al's features Ed quickly took his little brother's trembling hands into his own shaking ones. He flashed Al a winning –albeit pained– smile; if Ed knew anything right now, it was that he had to keep Al calm.

"Al, don't freak out on me. Relax; I just need you to listen, and do exactly as I tell you, 'kay?"

XxXxXxXxXx

Envy nearly jumped a foot into the air at the sound of the telephone next to his ear ringing, piercing the silence that had fallen over the house.

He hadn't moved from the spot on the couch he'd collapsed upon once he'd read the note resting on top of the phone (where Ed had obviously known he would spot it once Envy hadn't been able to find him anywhere in the house).

He'd been only experiencing one feeling for the past few hours-- guilt.

Guilt, guilt, guilt.

At first there'd been anger, then shock… but now, everything had added up to guilt.

The only few thoughts that had been running through his head consisted of:

'_I drove Edo out of the house. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.'_

'_Dammnit, this is all my fucking fault.'_

Or

'**Why didn't I fucking listen?** _He's my_ lover_dammnit!'_

So, as much as Envy hated the phone (and its irritating ringing) it was almost relieving to hear that someone was trying to get in touch with him now that he'd been alone for the past few hours.

Now there was just one problem…

Who the hell could it be?

He narrowed his eyes at the machine thoughtfully; _Ed_ was always the one to answer the phone… only a few people knew he lived here with the alchemist, and he never knew who was on the other side of the line… sooo…

What should he _do?_

The choice was made for him when the phone stopped ringing. Envy unconsciously let out a soft sigh of relief…

When the phone began to ring again.

His right eye twitched and he, once again, contemplated picking up the phone until it stopped ringing once more.

But obviously, someone was _very intent_ on his picking up the phone, for during the next five minutes he sat there, watching the phone as it rang again… and again… and _again, damn it!_

Finally, the Homunculus couldn't take the sound anymore and lifted the receiver from the base, groaning in open relief when the noise cut off abruptly and the phone (or the 'damned machine from hell' as Envy now preferred to call it) ceased its infernal ringing.

An idea quickly sparking, the Homunculus grinned to himself and, with a flash of blue-white light, the smirking blonde alchemist he loved so much replaced the Homunculus' usual form.

Cautious once more (although congratulating himself for his stroke of genius) the Sin brought the phone to his ear.

"Who the hell is it 'n whadya want?" "Ed" asked impatiently; quoting the usual greeting he heard his lover use so often upon retrieving the phone.

"…were right, Ed, he picked up… Hey, Envy?"

The shape shifter's eyes widened in recognition at the sound of the youngest Elric's voice; the boy sounded as relieved to hear him as he'd been when the phone stopped ringing… but his voice was high pitched and excited.

"Alphonse?" Another flash and the Homunculus resumed his usual form.

"Alphonse, what's wrong?" Envy interrupted, clutching the receiver tightly in his hand as he listened intently for the brunette's answer.

"Thank _God_ Ed knows you so well, Envy; he told me to ring until you got so annoyed you'd pick up, but you weren't picking up so--"

"So Ed got there…" Envy sighed, closing his eyes and slumping over, letting relief was over him.

"Yes, he got here, but… dammnit, Envy; you've _got _to get down to Risembool," Al wailed.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa; Alphonse, calm down," Envy demanded, shocked to hear the polite teenager curse; all the while knowing it meant the situation was at its worst.

He heard the boy take in a huge, shuddering breath before whimpering precisely what he dreaded:

"It's Edward; he just went into labor."

Silence.

"…Hey, En--?"

The line went dead.

XxXxXxXxXx

Joh: Whaaat? You're ending the chappie _there?_

Jessie: **Nods **Yep.

Joh: But… but that's… eviiiiiiiil!

Jessie: **Grins** Ah, well; all the more to look forward to in the next chapter, ne?

Joh: Aw…

Jessie: Don't complain… you got a video iPod.

Joh: YOSH! **Obsesses**

Jessie: **Sighes**Aw man, what'd I just get myself into…? **Smiles sheepishly**

aruslym** Alarmed **Please… don't… don't hurt yourself… **Sweatdrop** Thanks for telling me your perforce; we'll find out soon enough, ne?

razatip Really? Your name was in here? **Laughs** Wow! That's cool. It was _incredibly _fun to make Edo shop; you have _no_ idea… you should try it sometime!

loathed wolf spirit: Yosh; thank you for understanding my busy-ness. …I supposed I was a _little_ cruel to Envy in this chappie but… it was _so_ much fun; I just couldn't pass the chances up!

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: Winry vs. Alphonse—I don't either of them is prepared to give up the argument about the baby's gender.

Shimoariku: I'm happy you loved the chappie so much! Yeah, Winry _does_ seem to hate Envy's company, doesn't she? **Dies laughing**

Strlight99: Hooray for your givin' me inspiration! **Claps happily** I'm sooo happy you enjoy my writing so much!

kakashisninjadogs: No… she never, ever does. Thanks for your input! **Grins**

darkangel36: OMG, I was _so_ psyched to have the opportunity to have Edo on a cleaning spree… that's just about one of funniest scenes I can imagine involving our favorite chibi alchemist!

HolyMistress: Hey, there; thanks for your long review-- loved it as always! And I felt so… protected **Hides behind you from impatient people** Funny, funny! I love it when Ed blushes; especially when caused to blush by none other than his palm tree XD Morbid for a kid? (Hey, that rhymed!) You honestly think they're still all in character? **Sighs in relief** Thank God; I've been a _tad_ worried about that. Glad ya enjoyed it!

imhappynessinabottle: S'okay; thanks a bunch for reviewing _this_ chappie-- wouldn't mind it you kept on reviewing, though XD

sprinkle-chan: Squee! I'm so happy you liked Envy's idea for the baby's room! And why throw the book? I don't think she was aiming for him but maybe there's something there in her subconscious… **Snickers** Poor guy.

FISHTaNK the Evil Fangirl: Poor Envy and his abused head… **Stifles giggles** Ya gotta admit, though; it's pretty hilarious anyways!

yaoi chicka: Poor, _poor_ Envy in this circumstance, ne?

Me And My God Complex: Yeah, right? She _is_ that kinda person, in any case… **Sweatdrop **Sheeh; Winry really scares me…

Jedi Mistress 1990: I'm glad you really thought it was a long enough chapter; that's a relief to me! Thanks for telling' me your preference for da baby! Oh yeah; and I got _such_ a laugh from your mini convo with Tenten and Neji! I wuv you too! XD **Huggles**

Seto's Darkness: Oh, I'm sorry you had to log in for _my_ sake XD But very thankful you were willing to go through _all _that trouble to give me your thoughts. Thank you XD Yesh, Edvy rocks mah socks, too. I'm actually quite happy you enjoy my fic even though you're not a huge mpreg fan; thanks for giving my writing a chance!

SoulfulZen: Yes, that's _exactly_ how writing this fic sounded. Sexy-no-jutsu for alchemy? Wow… that reminds me of my new favie saying: alchemists are _better_ that ninjas XD Glad you reviewers liked it!

ThePinkAlchemist: I'm glad you're in love with my fic; my fic loves you too for reviewing, as do I! **Laughs** No, seriously; thanks so much for da nice review!

chinsui-hime: **Smirk **Yesh. Yesh he does deserve some torture; after all, look through all the trouble Ed's going through having his baby XD

Mistress of the Night5: Glad you accidentally stumbled upon dis fic! Very glad you think I've kept the characters in character-- that's a _very_ important factor to me as I write! Thanks _so_ much for giving me feedback on your preference for the baby! I gotta agree with your outlook on (what little) female FMA characters there are. And don't forget Izumi… she ain't _quite_ that feminine, either! **Dies laughing**

Carrot The LuvMachine: One: I _love_ your screen name! Two: I'm so honored to hear you think I'm a good writer; that makes me sooo happy! Let's face it; mpregs (especially where Edo is pregnant) rock! I'm glad my fic makes an exception on your "other-than-EdxWinry" list! I hope my fic won't go down the drain in your perspective!

(Thanks again –as always– for your patience as I try best hardest to update the fic ASAP with each update! I can't believe how quickly the fic is coming' to an end… I hope you all continue to enjoy my writing and I can't wait to hear back from y'all! So with that, _siroopwafel_ to all reviewers (yeah… it's a _really_ good Dutch cookie!) and _who just finally watched the FMA movie? ME! _Review and tell me how you liked the movie, too! Later dudes!)


	12. A New Arrival

Disclaimer: I may not own Full Metal Alchemist, but I _definitely_ own a rather special person making a long awaited appearance in this chapter!

Jessie: Tadaa! It's the chapter everyone's been waitin' for!

Joh: Shaw!

Jessie: Yep; Envy 'n Edo's kid is on the way-- but at one of the worst times possible, ne? Envy's gotta get to Risembool ASAP. Will he make it in time? Well, you'll just have to read on, now, won't you?

Joh: **Stares at number of chapters** Wow, you've written a _lot_, Nee-san!

Jessie: **Tears** Its so grown up!

J Twins: **Huggles**

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"…Envy?"

Silence.

Al let out a heavy sigh as he replaced the phone on the base, slowly turning to face his pale-faced brother.

"Nii-san…I think the line went dead," Al murmured, wringing his hands nervously. Ed cast his eyes up to the ceiling in an agitated manner before shaking his head.

"Its okay, Al; at least he knows what's going on," Ed replied; although it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself rather than the young brunette.

"But… but Nii-san… are you sure you're okay?" Al blurted out, his eyes wide with fear.

"Alphonse, I'm fine-- really. Don't freak out on me now," Ed said sternly; though the brunette still looked unconvinced. Ed sighed and took Al's hands into his own.

"You gotta relax; I just need you to listen, and do exactly as I tell you, alright? Can you do that for me?" Ed asked seriously, his golden eyes boring into Al's honey colored ones.

"O-okay," Al gulped, though he was not able to fully cover the tremor in his voice. Edward's intent gaze softened, and he gently squeezed Al's hands.

"It's alright, Al, don't get so worked up," Ed said soothingly, moving a hand to Al's chin to tip his head up so that their eyes met. Ed smiled sheepishly.

"_Geez;_ the way you're acting, you'd think _you_ were the one in labor," Ed chuckled nervously, rubbing his belly gingerly. Al blinked a few times, and seemed to become more of himself as he grinned slightly at Ed's comment.

"Sorry, Ed. I'm okay… so, uh, should I go get Izumi?" he asked. Immediately Edward shook his head.

"No, Al; I just need you here with me, 'kay?" Smiling slightly at Al's affirmative nod, the two made their way back to the guest bedroom. They sat down together on the edge of the bed in a short, companionable silence. Then--

"It's so strange to think that, after all this time, you're actually gonna have a baby, Edward," Al mumbled, a slightly pink tinge on his cheeks even as he said it.

"Well there'd _better_ be something coming out of all of this; I didn't just endure nearly nine months of torture for nothin', Al," Ed snorted, rolling his eyes up to the ceiling.

"But I don't understand, Nii-san… the baby wasn't supposed to be due another week and a half; why did you have to go into labor _now?"_ Al protested. Ed stared at Al incredulously.

"Alphonse, it's not like I have any _say_ in when the baby decides to be born; it just _happens_," Edward said exasperatedly.

Al stared at the blonde, letting his words sink it

"Oh my God," Al suddenly gasped. Ed looked up at the brunette cautiously.

"Something wrong, Al?" he asked warily, waiting for Al to reply…

It seemed as though something or other that hadn't sunk in a _long_ time ago had decided to finally clarify itself in Al's mind, for hardly a split-second after he'd asked the younger Elric, he began to speak so fast it was nearly incoherent… but _only_ nearly:

"Omigod, Ed; do you know what this means?"

Sigh (Sweatdrop).

"…Al…"

"Oh my God-- Edward, I'm--"

"Come, on, Al… really, this isn't--"

"I'm gonna be an uncle, and I don't even know what uncles do; I've never had an uncle!_ What are uncles supposed to _do_, Ed?"_ Al wailed miserably, waving his arms around for emphasis.

Letting out a frustrated huff of breath, Ed caught and clamped onto one of Al's flailing arms, causing the younger for to squeak in surprise.

"_Alphonse. I'm _alright,_ damn it,"_ Ed growled, staring the brunette down dangerously. Alphonse quieted at once in response to his brother's firm, yet reassuring touch.

"Calm _down_, Al; it's just like what happened when we were stuck in the mountains with Payaninya, remember? What's the difference _here?_" Ed asked exasperatedly. Al blinked, temporarily speechless. After a moment, the brunette sighed; lowering his gaze so that he stared down into his lap.

"Well, Nii-san, for one thing, we knew for _sure_ that help was coming, and second of all…" Al paused to gulp back a sob, "…y-you're my brother, and I don't want anything bad happening to you…"

"Al, _please_ don't get sentimental on me right now…" Edward deadpanned; immediately the brunette blushed.

"Sorry, Nii-san…"

"Good. Now, shut up and--"

But whatever Ed had so kindly been about to add, Al never found out, for the next moment Ed had fallen off of the bed and onto to his knees in pain.

"Edward!" Al gasped, crouching beside Ed's trembling figure. His left hand gripped the bed sheets; his knuckles white, his fist was clenched so tightly.

Hurriedly, Al assisted the blond back onto the bed, gently pushing him back against the pillows and gazing at him worriedly. After a few more (obviously agonizing) moments, the contraction had passed and Ed slumped back against the pillows wearily.

"…Is it bad?"

"…Alphonse?"

"Yes, Nii-san?"

"…To be totally honest, Al, I'm kind of surprised you're here today; I can't _believe_ Mom actually went through this _twice_…

XxXxXxXxX

"Move it!"

"_Whoa!"_

"S'cuse me!"

"Hey-- watch it!"

"Fuck off!'" Envy hissed as he continued dashing down the street; resisting the urge to turn back to strangle the man. He groaned in open relief when he first sighted the train station, only quickening his sprint; his speed caught many bystanders' attention; mainly the ones whom he'd knocked over in his rush to get to the station.

None of the P.R.'s in the vicinity had time even to make the slightest movement to stop the determined Sin before he reached the gates allowing the ticketed passengers through to the tracks.

Envy slowed down to a walk, his eyes darting back and forth as he searched for any hint as to where he might find a train headed to Risembool.

"Excuse me!" Envy called, walking over to the conductor standing outside the door of a train, giving the last call to board the train to any potential passengers.

"Can I help ya?"

"In fact, you can. Do you know if there are any trains heading to Risembool?"

The conductor frowned slightly in concentration, scratching his chin thoughtfully.

"Lesse 'ere… Risembool?" the man shrugged helplessly.

"Sorry, kid; the last train headin' out there left sometime 'round two 'n a half hours ago… But I think I heard somethin' 'bouta train headed out t' Dublith makin' some detour to the boondocks-- Eh?" The conductor blinked and glanced around upon realizing that the wild-haired boy who'd just approached him was nowhere in sight.

Deciding he'd waited for any late-arrivers long enough, the man clambered aboard the train chuckling softly to himself, shaking his head.

"Kids these days."

XxXxXxXxX

Izumi had only just walked through the door when she found herself running up the stairs of the Rockbell residence in an instinctive response to hearing her two boys yelling.

Bursting through the bedroom door, she hurriedly took in the scene; Al was pale faced as he held a shuddering, agonized blonde who, it seemed happened to be holding Al's hand… with his right. She allowed herself a quick wince for the unfortunate brunette's sake before hurrying over beside the two brothers.

Wordlessly, she helped pry Al's hand away from Ed's (literally) iron grasp and pushed the blonde back against the pillows; flinching at the nearly inaudible whimper that escaped the blonde's lips. Watery golden eyes fluttered open to take in Izumi's features before Ed burst out stuttering.

"Se-Se-S-Sensei, I-I--"

"Shh; calm down, everything's alright, Edward," Izumi said –and in such a soothing voice that Al did a double take– before turning to Al.

"How long ago did this start?" Izumi ordered, gently unbraiding Ed's sweat slicked hair.

"I-I guess around… half an hour ago?" Al whimpered. Izumi let out a soft sigh of relief.

"Alright, that's good; at least it hasn't been all that long…"

"Oh my _God; Edward!"_

The only warning the three in the room received was a shriek and a blur before Winry was by Ed's side; Pinako hurrying in after her. Winry looked absolutely mortified.

"Oh my God… is he okay?" Winry whispered, her bright blue eyes shining with worry as she gazed at the small blonde.

"He will be in a matter of hours," Izumi replied curtly; occupied tying Ed's hair back into a hastily made, messy bun. With that task finished, she clapped her hands together in a businesslike fashion.

"Alright, first things first; Pinako, could you be so kind as to heat up another batch of water? Winry, be a dear and go bring me a bunch of towels. Alphonse-- for God's sake, don't just _stand _there gawking; go do _something_ useful!"

With a weary sigh, Izumi slapped a hand to her forehead, listening to the mixed affirmatives she received. Once only she and Edward remained in the room she turned her attention back to the blonde sitting on the bed and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Focus on breathing deeply, Edward," she said gently, sitting on the free space available by the edge of the bed.

"Has it gotten worse?" Izumi asked urgently, waiting for a reply; however, none came.

"Edward? Edward, are you alright?" Izumi asked; her usually stoic mask crumbling as she started at the teen's tear-streaked face. When the blonde didn't reply, she tilted the teen's chin up to face her; only then did she realize he was crying.

"I…I can't do this," Ed croaked weakly, blinking as tears slowly rolled down his cheeks.

"Edward, of course you can; you and I both know that you've endured pain comparable to this; you can't back out of this commitment now--"

"No, Sensei; I _know_ that I can do this… I just…" More tears welled up in Ed's eyes as he finally looked up into Izumi's concerned face.

"…I screwed everything up…" He lowered his eyes, obviously embarrassed by his tears.

"I mean… this is all my fault," he mumbled. Izumi arched an eyebrow.

"Edward Elric, what on _earth_ are you talking about?"

"If I hadn't gotten so upset, I'd still be back with Envy," he hiccupped.

_Smack_

His eyes widened when he felt a hand connect with his cheek. He stared at Izumi in confusion, touching his face where he'd been hit.

"Don't you dare go about thinking this situation is your fault just because you had a stupid fight; no one could have expected this outcome; do you understand me?" Izumi demanded. After a moment's hesitation Ed nodded. Izumi let a rare smile grace her lips.

"Then I think it's about time you started to get ready to have this baby."

XxXxXxXxX

_Riiiing…_

_Riiiing…_

_Click_-- "Dr. Setzar's office; how may I help you?"

"Hello-- may I please speak with Dr. Setzar?"

"I'm sorry; he's not in right now."

"_What? _But it's already six 'o clock …"

"I'm sorry, but he's away on an emergency business trip and won't be back for another… three hours at the least."

"Oh… is that so?"

"I'm very sorry for any inconvenience this may cause you."

"Oh no, it's just that… it's really important that I speak to him as soon as possible…"

"Then I'll be sure to tell him to give you a call as soon as he comes in."

"Alright… thank you very much… goodbye."

With a sigh, Al slowly replaced the phone onto the base.

"No luck?" Pinako asked worriedly. Al shook his head dejectedly.

"None whatsoever…" he muttered with a deep frown. The two stood there in silence before flinching at the sound of a strangled yell, accompanied by Izumi's voice barking his name. Snapping out of his reverie, Al hastily made his way upstairs (where, up until now, he'd been banned from for the past hour).

"Ngh…" Edward doubled over in agony, squeezing the sides of the bed tightly. When the contraction had passed, he fell back onto the pillows, letting out a small whimper.

"Shh, I know it hurts," Izumi murmured, brushing Ed's bangs –-plastered to his forehead with perspiration-- away from his face before standing up straight and turning to face the two teens standing in the doorway; all business.

"Did you reach the doctor?" She shook her head in exasperation as they shook their heads, and returned her focus to clocking the time between Edward's contractions.

Meanwhile, everything was happening too fast for Edward to process fully; everything was a mere blur for him, and he was trying to make sense of what had happened so far. One minute he'd been standing by Alphonse's side as the younger made an attempted call to Envy; the next, he was tucked into his bed, and now his younger brother was bouncing on his heels nervously by his bedside.

Speaking of which…

"Al, I'm sorry, but if you don't stop jumping around I'm gonna fucking _kill_ you," Ed said between gritted teeth as another contraction passed. When the pain began to slowly ebb away, the blonde sank back against the bed with a loud groan. As soon as he relaxed, Winry dunked a cloth in the bowl of cool water in her lap; quickly placing it on Ed's forehead.

"I swear, woman have _got_ to be prepared for this in some way men are not…" Ed muttered angrily, glancing up at Izumi for an affirmative.

"Well, Edward, men's bodies aren't structured in a way meant to carry a baby, while women's are. But I can assure you, the pain is the same, if that's what you're implying," Izumi replied dryly. Ed rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, glancing out the window hopefully.

"Edward, stop looking out the window like that; Pinako will let us know when they arrive-- _you_ just concentrate on preparing yourself for the next contraction," Izumi ordered, her frown lightening slightly at the desperate look Ed had in his eye.

"Well there sure as hell isn't one right now," he said pointedly. Izumi raised an eyebrow.

"Well, there sure as hell is going to be one right about… oh, now," Izumi replied sarcastically, glancing at the clock hanging on the wall. Immediately, Ed bolted upright, his eyes screwed tightly shut as he swore loudly.

Now Alphonse; who always hated to see his brother in pain, decided it might be best to try and distract the blonde.

"Okay, okay, um, on a scale from one to… oh, let's say about fifty--"

"_A thousand and _fucking_ one!"_ Ed howled, pounding his fists by his sides in frustration.

XxXxXxXxX

"Last call for the 7 'o clock to Dublith!"

Envy immediately skidded to a halt before spinning around to glance about the platform. He caught a glimpse of a bunch of people hurrying toward the opposite side of a blaring locomotive he was standing near and walked to the other side.

He looked about for the people and spotted a few last passengers boarding the train.

A man stood by the only remaining open door, taking the offered tickets and ushering the late-arrivers onto the train.

"S'cuse, me; is this the train heading to Dublith?" Envy called as he jogged up to him. The man --who had just turned to board the train himself—glanced back and smiled.

"Indeed, it is," he replied, stepping down once more. Envy sighed in relief.

"Okay, this is kind of an emergency; I didn't have time to get a ticket; the line was _way_ too long, and I'm in a _huge_ hurry to get to Risembool," Envy explained. The conductor frowned and scratched his head.

"And they let you past without a ticket?" He asked doubtfully. Envy blinked before quickly thinking up a believable excuse.

"Listen; my wife's in labor, and I've got to get to Risembool as fast as possible," he blurted out, only just managing to hold back a snort of laugher; honestly, if Ed had been able to hear him just now…

"As much as I wanna help, I'm afraid I can't let you board without some sort of evidence of the circumstance," the conductor explained apologetically. His eyes widened in surprise when his feet abruptly left the ground as he was raised by his collar. His face was pulled close so that he was staring directly into fierce,narrowed violet eyes.

"You had better fucking lemme on this train, or I swear, I will--"

"Excuse me, but I think this is a situation in which I can be of assistance."

In his surprise, Envy dropped the poor man back onto his feet. The Homunculus spun around; only to be met with smiling, blue-green eyes.

"_You…"_ he breathed, not daring to believe his luck.

XxXxXxXxX

A full five hours later found all the residents (both permanent and temporary) in the guest bedroom, desperately trying to calm the poor blonde down. The alchemist only became more and more agitated as the contracts hit him consecutively more frequently

"This isn't good," Izumi murmured, combing her fingers through her dark hair as Ed relaxed, panting heavily as another surge of pain passed. The moment the statement left her lips, Alphonse's worried honey eyes met her stormy blue ones.

"What's wrong?" He asked, moving closer to Ed anxiously at the sound of another pained sob.

"If we can't get in touch with Dr. Setzar… we might just have to go about this operation ourselves," Izumi replied with a frown. Al's eyes widened.

"But--!"

"N-n…"

Everyone's attention snapped to the gasping blonde, struggling to sit upright and speak.

"I-I c-can't… En…vy's not…"

"Edward…" Winry began nervously.

"Edward Elric, this baby is coming right here, right now whether _you like it or not_, so _shut up_," Izumi growled dangerously. But the blonde wouldn't be silenced.

"N-no way in f-fucking h-ell," he hissed, his eyes flashing dangerously.

"I'd have to agree with Edo, Mrs. Curtis; not even _I_ can get O'chibi-chan to change his mind when he's made a decision," a rather familiar voice chuckled amusedly.

Izumi spun around and Al leapt up from the side of the bed; Ed froze, his golden eyes huge and bright as he focused on the form leaning casually against the doorframe to the bedroom.

"E-Envy?" He whispered, not daring to believe his eyes. Envy smirked, coming to sit by the nearly dumbstruck blonde, pulling him into a gentle embrace.

"What; you thought I'd miss this? Nope; not for anything in the world," Envy murmured, pressing a kiss to Ed's forehead. There was silence in the room, as everyone waited for Edward to respond, which was eventually interrupted by a loud—

_Clang_

"Where the _fuck_ _were_ you, you _bastard--_ I was beginning to get _worried _about you!" Ed wailed, throwing his arms around the Sin's neck. Envy rolled his eyes and pulled away, shaking his head at the agitated blonde.

The next moment a young man was kneeling by Edward's side, checking his pulse.

"Who…" Izumi trailed off as she stared at the stranger taking out various instruments out of a large case. Envy grinned, rubbing the spot on his shoulder where Ed's fist had connected painfully.

"Right; allow me to introduce Dr. Brian Setzar," he drawled, chuckling softly at his bewildered chibi who still only had eyes for him.

"So… he was with _you_ this entire time?" Al asked meekly from Ed's other side; he let out a long sigh of relief at Envy's nod.

"That explains why we couldn't get in touch with him," Winry shrugged helplessly.

"Alright, has anyone been keeping track of the time it takes between Edward's contractions?" Brian asked as he got up to his feet. Izumi nodded briskly.

"Yes; they last around five minutes, and start up again about every two," she said, glancing worriedly toward the blonde, who it seemed had just been hit with another contraction as she spoke. Brian whistled softly.

"It looks like we made it right on time, then, doesn't it?" Brian muttered; Izumi only nodded.

"If you'd come any later, we might have had to do this ourselves," she sighed. Suddenly she was glaring at everyone in the room.

"Alright, everybody _out_," she said pointedly, one hand on her hip and the other pointing toward the door.

"But I want to stay with _Nii-san_," Alphonse said pointedly; however, he quickly changed his mind when he saw the familiar, predatory gleam in his teacher's eyes, aiming to be the very first one out the bedroom door. After she'd impatiently managed to herd the protesting group out the door (with Pinako's assistance) she turned back to face the remaining three; rolling her eyes before she closed the door behind them.

Ed gazed up at Envy as the Homunculus approached him, still breathing heavily from the passing contracting.

"You're f-fucking amazing, y-you know that?" Edward panted, grinning weakly up at his lover. Envy smirked and rolled his eyes.

"Since when _wasn't_ I?" Envy asked smugly, gently pulling the blonde to rest up against his chest. Ed closed his eyes, resting the side of his face against Envy's chest.

"Envy… I'm sorry, I didn't--"

"You shouldn't be the one apologizing, Edo, that was probably the most fucked up thing I've ever done; making you run out on me like that when you were so close to having the baby," Envy replied quietly.

Ed glanced up suddenly at the sound of a loud _thunk_ coming from behind Envy. His eyes were wide; perhaps only just noticing the doctor was in the room with them, organizing a bunch of equipment he pulled out of a large case by his feet.

"_Brian?"_ Edward asked incredulously, blinking rapidly to make sure he wasn't seeing things. Brian gave a slight start upon being addressed so suddenly, but turned around to face the blonde.

"Yes Edward?"

"But how…? Al and Winry couldn't get a hold of ya; how the hell did you know to come to Risembool_?"_ Ed asked, sounding just as baffled as he looked. Brian chuckled softly, turning back to finish setting up his equipment as he spoke.

"I was called out for an emergency appointment this morning in Xenotine. It was just my luck that, as I was stepping off of my train back in Central Station, I thought I heard a familiar voice. Well, wasn't I surprised when I saw Envy arguing with a conductor! I think I might have intervened just in time; I believe Envy was aiming toward the use of death-threats at that point-- and so here we are," Brian beamed, dropping a scalpel onto the table with finality.

"That's unbelievable…"

"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" Brian chuckled, smiling at the dubious expression on Edward's face. But the next moment, he was all seriousness.

"Alright, the sooner we get started here, the better. In about another thirty seconds, another contraction should hit you … the next thing we've got to do is give you an anesthetic…" As he spoke, Brian turned toward the table with Ed watching him intently; only to have his eyes grow to the size of dinner plates when the young doctor turned back around to face him, holding the biggest needle he'd ever seen.

"Holy shit…"

"Alright; if you hold still this won't hurt a bit, Edward, I promise--"

"Don't you fucking dare come near me with that thing," Ed demanded, staring at the sandy-haired man with a dangerous glint in his eye. However, he was so focused on glaring at Brian that he completely missed the furtive glance Brian and Envy exchanged.

He was, however, only too well-aware of his lover's much-missed lips caressing his own the next second. Ed let out a soft sigh of contentment as he kissed back; barely flinching at the slight pinch he felt at the very base of his spine…

Ed broke the kiss first; suddenly feeling slightly lightheaded as he gazed into Envy's face. It struck him just how hard it was to remain sitting up and the next thing he knew, he was slumped back against the pillows, feeling calmer than he'd felt in a _long_ time.

With much effort, he managed to turn his head to the side with his vision going in and out of focus the whole while. He could just barely make out Envy and Brian talking as the doctor replaced a large object into the case, gesturing at Envy before the green-haired Sin nodded and hesitantly started out the door.

"Ngh… En…vy," Ed struggled to call; however, it only came out as a soft whimper. He saw Envy stop short and turn back around-- and then he was beside him, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

And then everything went black.

XxXxXxXxX

"Geez, it feels like we've been sitting here forever…" Winry grumbled, nervously twisting a stray lock of blonde hair between her fingers. Al glanced up toward the worried girl.

"Winry, it's only been about three hours since we left them in there…"

"Well, that's a long time!" Winry protested angrily. Alphonse didn't reply, however he, too was wondering just how long it usually took for someone in Ed's scenario to give birth. It had gotten strangely quiet ever since Brian had gotten up there, and they hadn't heard anything as small as a reassuring curse from the easily angered blonde.

Although Pinako had offered a place for them to sleep, they were both restless and immediately knew that sleep would not come easily. So they'd decided to stay up, waiting for _something_ to happen. The old woman had retired to her room to rest, leaving the two childhood friends by themselves in the dining room.

"Do you think Edward will be okay?" Winry asked quietly.

"…I think he'll pull through; it's not as if life-or-death situation's are new to him," Al grinned, trying to lighten Winry's mood; it seemed to have had the reaction he'd been hoping for, for a very slight smile played on Winry's lips, and she nodded.

Gradually gathering up his courage, the brunette scooted closer toward the mechanic; reaching over and shyly taking Winry's hand; giving it a gentle, yet reassuring squeeze. Winry gave a slight start and glanced toward their hands; Al could only just make out a slight blush creeping onto her features, but didn't make anything of it; knowing that his face was just as pink.

…But it _was_ a good sign that she wasn't making any move to try and pry her hand away from his, right? It wasn't that he was worried or anything, about her not liking him like he liked her… right?

And the next thing Alphonse knew, she was resting her head against his shoulder, her eyes closed and her breaths even in sleep; merely giving the brunette further opportunity to contemplate his dilemma.

XxXxXxXxX

The nearly inaudible sound of a door opening by next to him brought Envy back to his senses; he was immediately awake as he registered a very tired-looking Brian sticking his head out the door of the bedroom, his eyes finally coming to rest upon him. The man smiled slightly, beckoning for the Sin to come inside before his head disappeared back through the door. Envy got to his feet, wondering how long he'd slept as he hurried into the room…

And he froze.

He was faintly aware of Brian leaving the room and closing the door behind them; undoubtedly heading downstairs to update the rest of the impatient inhabitants.

Suddenly he found his feet were slowly carrying him toward the bed, where he took a seat in the chair placed by the bedside, gazing at the sight before him in wonder.

An exhausted, quite disoriented, but glowing Edward lay back against the pillows, smiling weakly at him.

But more importantly, it was the source of Edward's pride that had left the Homunculus stunned beyond words. He gazed unblinkingly below his lover's smiling face, where the smallest baby he'd ever seen lay sleeping; gently cradled in the blonde's arms.

Envy found that his throat had gone dry, for all of a sudden, all of the many things he'd thought he would be saying at this very moment had flown right out of his head; and so the first thing he found himself saying was--

"Well waddya know? Winry'll be happy."

"Yeah; poor Al's gonna go through hell," Ed chuckled, smiling loving at their daughter.

Slowly –and with Envy's help– the blonde managed to come to a sitting position.

"Here; hold your arms out like this," Ed ordered; when a perplexed Envy had done so, he found his newborn child placed into his arms. His amethyst eyes widened, and he glanced between the baby and his lover.

"Now pull yours arms back against your chest and hold her there," Ed murmured; his golden eyes alert to every move the Sin made. Even as he carefully followed Ed's directions, Envy looked somewhat panicked.

"But what if I drop her…?"

"You won't," Ed said firmly.

Allowing himself to be won over by the conviction in Edward's voice, Envy's eyes were drawn to the sleeping baby; able to gaze at his daughter for the first time.

She had very fine, light blonde hair that matched with her pale complexion. She was very small and light; it amazed Envy that she weighed anything at all, being so small. She had a delicately structured face— _'Just like mine,'_ Envy realized with a start. And although her eyes were closed, he could clearly see they were shaped like Edward's, as was her mouth.

Envy had seen his fair share of babies in the past four hundred years or so he'd been around, but he was sure that this had to be the most beautiful, perfect little girl in the world.

He felt an unfamiliar, prickling sensation in his eyes as he scrutinized her, but he ignored it-- too intrigued by the sight of his newborn child to care, until he felt one of Edward's hands had come to rest on his face; his thumb tenderly brushing the wetness away from his cheek.

"She's perfect."

A soft kiss was placed on his lips, followed by a warm smile.

"I know."

The two parted; only to move closer together to examine their daughter.

"So… what are we gonna name her?" Envy asked eventually, breaking the peaceful silence that had fallen.

"Well, actually… I've kind of been saving a name I liked…" Ed began hesitantly.

"Okay, let's hear it."

"It's Serenity," Ed replied at last, immediately glancing up to look at Envy to see his reaction. Envy blinked a couple of times because repeating the name.

"Serenity…" He said slowly, liking the way the name rolled easily off his tongue.

"I like it; Serenity it is," Envy said decisively, grinning down at Ed before leaning forward to kiss him again; both blissfully ignorant to their small audience just outside the slightly ajar door.

"Now who says Homunculi can't have souls?" Al murmured to Winry, a gentle smile playing on his lips as they surveyed the sweet moment between the Sin and his brother.

XxXxXxXxXx

"It was a miracle you showed up when you did, Brian; thank you so much."

"Don't thank me; we really only have God to thank that I was here in time," Brian replied to Izumi, grinning as he carefully replaced everything into his case; snapping it closed with a sense of accomplishment.

Ed made a small noise from where he rested against his pillows in response to Brian's statement, and everyone's attention turned to him.

"'M atheist," he murmured as his eyes slowly closed; his grogginess from the anesthetic and operation finally catching up with him.

"Well, Nii-san, we've had a whole lot of miracles happening this past year; I think it's about time we start believing," Al laughed, gazing at his older brother fondly. Ed glanced up with a smile, motioning lazily for the younger Elric to come over. The moment the brunette sat on the edge of the bed, Ed reached over to pull Al into a gentle, endearing hug.

"Thank you so much, Al; I could _not_ have done this without you," Ed said earnestly. Al blinked in bewilderment.

"W-what? But I didn't do anything," Al objected, blushing slightly. Ed shook his head.

"You helped more than you think, Alphonse," Ed insisted with a knowing smile; however, he refused to explain any further.

"She's beautiful, isn't she?" Winry sighed, tracing a finger gently down the baby's cheek, still sleeping soundly in her arms.

"Yeah," Envy replied; still sounding strangely subdued.

Ed gave a slight start when a hand came to rest on his shoulder; gripping it firmly. He looked up to see Izumi smirking down at him.

"Was that enough of a punishment for keeping secrets from me, Edward?" she asked, her smirk only broadening.

"Enough to last me a lifetime, if that's what you mean," Ed joked; gaining a small, amused chuckled from the housewife. Her smirk melted into a smile, and she nodded slightly.

"I'm very proud of you, Edward," she said softly before patting him on the back and turning her focus to the little girl carefully being passed to Alphonse to hold. Her mouth twitched slightly and she turned around casually, so as not to draw attention to herself. Edward didn't say anything, having seen the tears quickly welling in his teacher's eyes at the sight of the baby.

"She's so _tiny_, Nii-san," Al said, staring at his niece in awe as he carefully passed her back into Edward's embrace.

"Can you believe it; she's even smaller than _you_, Pipsqueak," Pinako noted with an amiable grin. Edward merely glowered at her.

Suddenly, Envy nudged the blonde gently with his elbow, and Ed looked up.

"Ne, Edo; I think she's waking up," he said with a small grin; Ed dropped his gaze to the baby nestled in his arms. Indeed, their daughter's eyes were slowly fluttering open; Envy drew a breath in surprise when he found himself staring directly into his own eyes.

"Well lookie here; she has her father's eyes," Pinako chuckled, seeing the amazement written all over Envy's face.

Immediately alert the infant looked around, taking her surroundings for the first time; her wide, violet eyes blinking curiously at the sight of everyone's faces. She let out a small, happy gurgle before turning her head up to stare into Edward's face. Her little arms waved in the air before she lowered them, letting out a small yawn and promptly falling back asleep.

"Oh my God, she's so _adorable!"_ Winry squealed, bouncing up and down excitedly.

"So, have you two settled on a name for her, yet?" Izumi asked; her usual, calm mask back in place although she allowed the corners of her mouth to curve up into a small smile.

"That's right; I've got to sign her full name on her birth certificate," Brian said, holding up a document for the new parents to see.

"Yes we have; her name's Serenity Trisha Elric," Ed replied with a smile. Envy glanced down at him.

"Your mother's name?" He asked quietly, his eyes softening slightly. Edward nodded, smiling faintly.

"Yeah; since I found out I was pregnant, I knew if we had a girl, I wanted to name her after Mom…" Edward trailed off. A lump had risen in his throat and he couldn't speak; all he could do was gaze at their daughter; seemingly transfixed on her face.

Brian nodded absent mindedly as he carefully copied down the name on the documented sheet of paper.

"Serenity… it's such a pretty name," Winry gushed; Izumi and Pinako both nodded in approval.

Al began to say something when he let out a sudden, long yawn and closed his eyes; leaning forward to let his head rest on his hand. Ed snapped out of his trance and grinned.

"You tired, Al?" Ed teased, glancing toward the weary brunette.

"You'd be tired too, if _you_ were waiting up all night for your niece to be born," Al retorted as he wiped the tears produced from his yawn away; earning a laugh from his brother.

"Well, I _personally_ believe it's high time everyone went to bed-- _especially_ you, Edward," Pinako said firmly, glancing around at everyone pointedly but letting her gaze linger on the bed-ridden chibi the longest.

Slowly, everyone save Brian, Edward and Envy had left the room, being directed by Pinako as to where they were to sleep.

At last, Brian dropped his pen and held the birth certificate away to make sure everything on it was in order, his lips moving as he mouthed the words to himself as he read.

"Alright; Edward, Envy, congratulations, you are officially the parents of Serenity Trisha Elric," Brian announced with a beam, handing the certificate to Envy (the only one with free hands). He bid the new parents goodnight before leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

Envy scanned the paper quickly; arching his eyebrows slightly as he read the printed information.

"Wow, she's really light…"

"Lemme see that, will ya?" Ed asked, moving over to allow the Sin to slip into the bed beside him. He gently passed the baby to Envy before taking the certificate and quickly scanning it.

And all of a sudden, Edward gave a tremendous start from where he lay next to Envy-- immediately he glanced over worriedly to make sure he hadn't disturbed their daughter; she merely shifted in her sleep to get closer to Envy's' warmth.

"What's wrong?" Envy asked softly, his eyes wide with alarm. Not bothering to respond, Ed's gaze dropped back to the certificate he held in his trembling hands; his golden eyes darting back and forth as he read and re-read the date printed on the sheet of paper; it was only then that it clicked in Envy's mind.

After a full minute of tense silence, Edward's grasp went slack and he let the paper slip between his fingers so that it fluttered onto his lap. Envy studied the abandoned document thoughtfully for a moment before looking up to Edward's pale face; he understood, now.

_This certificate verifies that_

_Serenity Trisha Elric_

_Was born to Envy and Edward Elric_

_Weighing five and a half lbs_

_With a length of eighteen cm._

_At two forty-eight in the morning_

_Of October 3rd_

_Year 17_

Silently, Envy transferred their sleeping child to his right arm, so that he could make room for his small lover to hold him as he pressed up against him; burying his face into his chest as he desperately tried not to cry.

"Why today? Out of _any_ day in the entire year, why did it have to be_ today?"_ Edward whispered, looking up at Envy for an answer.

The Homunculus didn't answer right away, but thought carefully for a while.

"I think… Edo… that this just means you have to let go of the past; just because something awful happened once upon a time ago don't mean that this day was always meant to be terrible. Besides, now you have reason to be thankful for it," Envy said slowly, only allowing himself to look back down to Edward when he'd finished speaking.

And immediately found his chibi's lips against his.

"I love you, Envy," Ed said softly when they had parted, before snuggling up against the Sin with a content sigh. Before long, the exhausted alchemist slipped off into a desperately-needed sleep; leaving Envy to enjoy the presence of both his chibi and their long-awaited daughter until he too fell asleep.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jessie: Yay! Ed 'n Envy have a little girl now!

Joh: **Throws confetti **Yay!

Jessie: Guys, I _seriously_ hope you enjoyed this chapter, because it took me an immensely long time to finish! I'm terribly sorry about the wait, but I haven't had the chance to write in a _really_ long time; life happens, things happen… you get the point.

Joh: **Nods **Shaw.

Jessie: Oh yeah; so I've actually had the idea to have Ed 'n Envy's baby be born on the day Edward burned his house down from the very beginning. I'm telling you cuz I'm very proud of it XD

Joh: **Pats back** Good job, Nee-san.

Jessie: Again, hope you liked it! The next chappie will probably be the _last_.

Joh: **Gasps**

Jessie: So, if you people find it in your hearts not to hate me too much for the wait, please review and tell me what you think.

Joh: **Gushes** Aww, you're so polite! That's cuuuute!

Jessie: **Stares**

Joh: **Glomps** WHEEE!

J Twins: **Dances**

lilomissy021: Well I'm very glad you liked it! Hope this chappie lived up to what you were looking forward to!

twisted-language: Aw, I bet you can write just great! **Laughs** Well, there weren't any twins or triplets, but I hope you enjoyed this chappie anyway!

Light-Hideko: **Giggles** I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter so much! And yesh, that is, indeed, a cliffhanger!

FaeryDOLL: 1.) Numerous was indeed spelled right (good job)! 2.) Yeah, I know; people would hunt me down and literally kill me if I were to stop writing suddenly, ne? So I guess… better late than never in this case right? **Shudders at thought of angry mob** So don't you worry, I shall _indeed_ finish this fic!

darkangel36: Yay, someone responded to my question about the FMA movie! Yeah; although I didn't like what happened to Envy (my poor baby **Sobs**) it's still my new, all-time favie movie! **Jumps around** Sorry to disappoint you with the turn out being a girl **Sheepish grin** Ya win some, ya loose some. Hope you liked it anyway!

ArtemisRoseShadow: I UPDATED! WH00T!

Genki-angel-chan: Aw, and I love you too for reviewing! **Huggles** Thanks; it means a whole lot to me that you like it so much!

Zoorzh: Aw, 'tis okay; you remembered to review this time! I had fun writing about Edo 'n Envy's past; it just came to me, really, to include those flashbacks. So I'm glad you appreciated them! **Smiles** Here's your update! Aww; puppy dog face! Squee!

Yaoi Addicted Girls: I'm so happy you enjoy my fic so much; I hope you continue to like my writing! **Gasp** _Yay!_ Another Edvy fan! Whoot! Welcome to the awesome world of EnvyxEd fandom! **Waves EdoxEnvy flag around happily**

imhappynessinabottle: Glad you liked the chappie, glad you were excited, hope you were excited _this_ chappie and hope you like _this _chappie! **Grins **Hazzah; here's your next update. But seriously, I hope you liked this chapter!

ED'sGirl 4ever: **Laughs** Okay, that's cool; I'm pretty much off my rocker, too! Cuz being normal is just too boring! Insanity keeps ya on the edge! **Winks**

Jedi Mistress 1990: Yes; we _do_ love Envy, _and_ his stupidity! I love your new word; exorcism-ness! Made me giggle! So n'ways, I'm getting along in the Naruto series (which I don't own **Sweatdrop**) and as soon as I get up to the point with Akatsuki I'll totally read your fic and review!

ValentineMassacre: Glad you like it so much! And yes, it _is_ a good pairing. ED 'N ENVY ALL THE WAY, BABY!

FISHTaNK the Evil UglyDoll: OMG, you changed your name again **Rolling around laughing** I love it! Okay, yeah… **Giggles** So anyways, yes. Envy _does_ have terrible gets-pissed-off timing. By the way… thanks for responding to my FMA movie comment; it's actually pretty decent in English, too (much to my surprise **Laughs**) so hurry up 'n watch it! **Hugs**

kakashisninjadogs: **Dies laughing** Omg, the grizzly bear/innocent salmon comment killed me, dude. I hope you're happy. N'ways, sorry to disappoint ya, but no twins… I don't think poor Edo could've taken much more than what he did manage to survive… Heh heh, poor chibi. Glad you liked the chappie; hope this one's okay, too!

wolf-deamon333: **Giggles** Well Ed can't properly give Envy hell if he's totally out cold, now, can he? Oh well, at least he got in a hit with his mighty automail fist! CONGRATZ, it was indeed a little girl! YAY! **Hands you a cookie** Be happy.

An Angel Flying with broken wings: I hope it _was_ good by you; please tell me what you think! Can't wait for comments! Squee

Me And My God Complex: Yes. Rule #1: If you live with Edo, don't ignore him. Baaaad things happen **Giggles** Hope you liked it!

Mai-Kun: Aw, I'm so happy you like my writing! **Huggles** You're so nice!

Forever Yours Zana: **Rolling on the floor laughing** "their gorgeous love-child from heaven…" HAHAHAHA OMG, you're like, amazing; where _do_ you come up with dat kinda stuff? N'ways, I love Hoho Papa, too! He's all like… Hoho-y… yeah… So I hope you liked da chappie!

ThePinkAlchemist: S'aank you for all da nice comments… I feel so loved!

Mistress of the Night5: Thank you for your somewhat-existent patience. N'ways thanks for the kind feedback. Yeah, there _are_ a lotta guys and not enough girls, but that's okay only because it's such an AMAZING MANGA/ANIME!

Kaoru Gal: Aww, I love your comments, Sis! So now you know what she looks like… even though I already showed you the pic I drew… didn't I? **Thinks** Sorry, I can't remember **Sweatdrop** Oh well; next time I'll show ya! **Ish happy** I wuv ya, Imouto; and _all_ your spontaneous antics!

aruslym: Yeah… but I'm sure they'll make up for all the lost time _very_ quickly **Winks and laughs** Hope you liked da chappie!

sprinkle-chan: Yeah… I've gotten that "I'm evil" comment a lot for the last chapter **Laughs** Yay, you win! I really hope that this chappie was good enough so that it was worth the wait… And yesh, Envy _does_ love his photos! **Happy smile**

Zaidee: I've UPDATED, UPDATED, UPDATED! Your turn: PLEASE REVIEW, PLEASE REVIEW, PLEASE REVIEW! XD

SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: I LOVE EDVY! I TRIED TO UPDATE SOON! I'm a good fangirl-- really! **Sobs** …Okay, melodramatic moment over **Grin** So I hope your head did not explode during the wait. I'm glad you enjoyed the last chappie, and I hope you liked this one just as well!

SoulfulZen: I'm really glad you liked the way I wrote the last chapter; I also hope that this chapter was up to your standards. Always like your reviews; thank you very much!

Seto's Darkness: Thank you for the review. I'll just kind of explain what I was aiming at implying during the last chapter… over time, when people allow themselves to get to know each other better than they think, they learn new things and slowly get closer-- sometimes that leads up to a relationship. That's how Edo 'n Envy ended up together… okay? And yes… EDVY ROCKS SOCKS!

frogger666: If you didn't guess it, the pushing/shoving/running part of Envy's rush to get to Risembool was _completely_ inspired by your review. I cannot tell you how much fun writing that part was! THANK YOU! **Hands you tons and tons of cookies** So I really hope you liked this chappie! Thanks for reviewing!

Carrot The LuvMachine: Oh, wow! I made a usually non-Edvy fan enjoy my fic… I must have reached some new record or somethin'! Hazzah! I enjoy unique usernames like yours… it shows that there are still obsessive fangirls out there! Yes… I think I'll miss chubby Edo, too… darn it, now I wanna draw prego-Edo instead of finishing replying to reviews… Ah well! I shall finish, _then_ draw! Thanks for the review again! Hope you enjoyed the chappie **Typing furiously**

Dark Angel Maybe: Umm… yeah. As far as I know, labor _is_ painful **Laughs** Aw, thank you for your nice review! Squee!

DeityOfDeath: Okay, I love your username; it's really cool. And here's your update you so desperately wanted! Hope you liked it!

ShimoAneue: Yeah, I know what you mean; I don't really like cliffies either, but then you're even _more_ eager than usual for the story's update! Although… after reading all of the reactions from different people in the reviews, I can see why people write them… it's so entertaining! So it's… a girl! Hope you're happy! And I'm glad you liked the last chappie; hope you like this one as well!

Strlight99: Yeah, sorry about that! **Giggles** I'm glad you liked the last chappie and I honestly hope you liked this one, too!

yaoi chicka: That reminds me of Stuck, by Stacie Orrico… "I hate you, but I love you…" that's, like, one of my favorite songs. It reminds my of one of my favie Shaman King (which I don't own… **Sighs**) couples. Sorry to disappoint you with a baby girl… but c'est la vie! Hope you still like the fic anyway!

Nessee: Aww, thank you! I'm so happy you like my ficcy! I hope my work here in this chappie was acceptable. Thanks so much for reviewing!

razatip: Yeah… but I just _could not_ pass up the chance for such an awful cliffy **Laughs** Y'know what I mean… Yeah, Edo and Envy _do_ get into fights at the most inconvenient time, ne? I hope you liked the chappie! Thanks for the review!

IshizuWolfRider: I hope this chappie lived up to your expectations… I worked _really_ hard on it, so I honestly hope you enjoy it! **Crosses fingers hopefully**


	13. Epilogue

Disclaimer: In all honestly, would I even–_be_– on Fanfiction if I owned FMA? I think not.

Jessie: Well, this is the last chapter!

Joh: Your first completed multi-chapter fic! Whee; I'm so proud of you, Nee-san!

Jessie: **Huggles **S'aank you… And everybody else-- I'm _reeaally _sorry I couldn't get this up faster; I've been having some really frustrating computer problems…

Joh: Tsk tsk tsk...

Jessie: So anyways, I thought long and hard about how this should end, and so I hope everyone is content with the last chapter of Expecting the Unexpected! Enjoy!

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"How's Edward?" Alphonse asked quietly as Brian joined the Rockbell residents at the table; gaining Pinako, Winry and Envy's attention as well.

"He's fine— out cold, but I don't expect him to wake up on his own for another few hours at the very least," the doctor replied easily, smiling reassuringly at the young brunette.

"Would ya happen to know the earliest time we could get back to Central?" Envy asked suddenly, inquiring violet eyes studying the young surgeon. Brian paused to think for a moment before he answered.

"It depends on how Edward's feeling; I mean, if he's up to it, you two could head back later today," Brian shrugged. Envy made a small noise of acknowledgment before slowly getting to his feet.

"Where are you going, Envy?" Winry asked curiously.

"Well, I'm gonna go and start headin' out to the train station to pick up some tickets for this afternoon; if I know my chibi as well as I think I do, he'll be wanting to head back ASAP," Envy grinned.

"As long as there's nothing else that needs to be done here, I'll come with you," Al said cheerfully, glancing toward Pinako for affirmation; the old woman just chuckled and motioned for him to go along.

"I'll be heading down there, as well—I need to get back to Dublith as soon as possible; the store won't watch itself you know, and I'd feel _horrible_ if I left Sid to do all the work by himself any longer," Izumi sighed. Winry jumped up.

"I've finished all my chores, Granny, and since there's nothing else to do, may I go, too?" Winry asked-- thanking Pinako happily when her grandmother nodded with a smile, and following the rest of the station-bound group out the door. The old woman walked them out; watching them until they had made it to the end of the worn, dirt path leading up to the automail shop.

The old woman yawned widely, and smiled at Den; wagging his tail lazily as he approached her.

"Looks like it's just you an' me for a while, Den," she said softly, stroking the dog's head as she glanced around the much quieter space. The three other people currently occupying the house (Edward, Brian and Serenity) were all sleeping.

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Pinako was startled awake with the sound of Den's abrupt, angry barking.

"Quiet, Den-- what's gotten into you?" Pinako scolded gently, patting his head in an attempt to quiet the upset dog. Although his barking stopped, he continued to growl deeply in his throat.

She rubbed her eyes tiredly as she slowly regained her bearings. Glancing at the clock, she saw that merely half an hour had passed since Envy, Al, Izumi and Winry had left; they wouldn't be back for another few hours; especially if they were planning to see Izumi off.

She sent Den a warning look as a growl –one louder than before– rose in his throat; however, he was too preoccupied gazing angrily toward the front door. She glanced up to the door curiously and waited; sure enough, someone was knocking softly.

"You _never_ get upset when we have visitors," Pinako grumbled as she started toward the door; this only seemed to distress Den more, for he immediately began to howl. Pinako spun around, glaring at the dog.

"_Den!"_ Pinako finally shouted, exasperated. All at once, the dog's ears folded down against his head, and his tail dropped between his legs; sending a pathetic glance toward the elderly woman before slinking into the corner and lying down; gazing up at her gloomily. Pinako rolled her eyes at his dramatic behavior before she turned around to greet their visitor.

And her pipe instantly clattered to the floor noisily as her jaw dropped open in shock, while Den began to bark wildly once more.

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'_Whosat…? … En…vy …?'_

The semi-conscious blonde could've sworn he'd heard the door creak open, but…honestly, who the hell cared? Certainlynot _him_—he was too exhausted. Heck, it could've been _Mustang_ and he wouldn't have cared.

…On second thought, let's not go quite _that_ far.

He listened quietly to the slowly approaching footsteps… it must be Envy or Brian hesitantly entering the room; trying not to wake him up. He smiled faintly at the thought, and so he didn't bother opening his eyes when he felt someone settle down beside him on the very edge of his bed.

Edward mumbled softly in his sleep when he felt fingers gently brush his bangs away from his face; instantly, the person froze.

The young alchemist sighed softly as he nestled further into his cocoon of blankets, his eyes fluttering half-open as he attempted to identify his mystery guest. He managed to gather the strength to lift his head for a moment; gazing up blearily at the newcomer before letting his head fall back against the pillow and closing his eyes once more.

From his brief, sleepy glance, the only information he managed to grasp was that this person had blonde hair.

…And that he smelled of a certain perfume that –for years– he'd been trying to forget.

Golden eyes snapped wide open in recognition before he struggled to sit upright. However, a strong hand landed on his chest, and firmly pushed him back down (albeit, gently).

Ed's mouth worked to form words for a full minute before settling into a firm line; his eyes flashing dangerously. It took a full minute for Edward to collect himself enough to the point where he was able to speak. And the first coherent word out of his mouth was, expectedly:

"Hohenheim," Edward acknowledged; sounding deadly calm.

The older man's shoulders sagged slightly, a small, sad smile forming on his lips.

"Hello, son—"

"**_You're-no-father-of-mine,"_** Edward ground out between clenched teeth.

There was another pause, before Hohenheim sighed quietly; his hand still resting against Edward's chest. Edward –for who, it seemed, had finally registered Hohenheim's hand– brusquely pushed his hand away, glowering. Stealing a glance at his father's face, Ed realized that his father's wandering eyes had fallen on Serenity, who lay fast asleep in her bassinette beside his bed.

Hohenheim turned to face his furious son, before doing the last thing Edward had ever expected.

He smiled.

"She's beautiful, Edward," Hohenheim said quietly, seemingly mesmerized by the sight of the sleeping babe. Ed felt the color rush to his face and he cursed under his breath, embarrassed.

"Well, I—uh—you…" Ed fumbled for a comeback, before he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and swallowed his pride.

"Yeah, I know." Hohenheim glanced curiously toward Edward; noting the surprisingly mellow tone his son was using with him. He saw the smile twitching on the corners of the younger blonde's lips as he internally struggled to remain angry with his father, while gazing at his daughter at the same time.

"What's her name?"

"Serenity Trisha Elric," Edward said; a hint of pride entering his tone as he said it.

"…Trisha would have been so happy," Hohenheim murmured at last; his eyes becoming misty as he took a moment to reminisce his days as a husband; perhaps even his short time as a father. Edward nodded stiffly; though it was becoming increasingly difficult to hold his attitude when his father was speaking about his mother; not to mention, praising his daughter.

If _that_ wasn't the winning method to get on Edward's sensible side, then nothing was.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Edward asked at last, not able –nor willing, for that matter– to keep from blurting the question out any longer. Hohenheim looked mildly taken aback at Ed's question.

"Well I wanted to see you, Edward—_and_ meet my granddaughter, for that matter. I'd presume there wouldn't by anything wrong with that," he stated quietly; glancing Edward's way as though he were waiting for (though, admittedly not seeming to expect) any corrections his son might have.

If Hohenheim had expected either some understanding reaction or none whatsoever, he was going to be rather disappointed.

"You _**bastard**!_ You disappear when Mom needs you the most; don't give a shit when she dies and me 'n Al nearly _kill_ ourselves tryin' to bring her back; don't give either of us _any_ sign that you're still among the living; and _now_ you pop up out of the blue after –what has it been now– _well over a_ fucking _decade_, and expect there's _nothing _wrong_ with that? WELL, HAVE **I** GOT NEWS FOR --!_" Ed stopped short in mid-rant when his father unexpectedly reached out and touched his wrist gently.

The blonde blinked; noticing Hohenheim's gaze focused not on him, but Serenity. Immediately, Ed felt his anger melt away; it seemed that his shouting had disturbed the infant, for she was close to waking. She squirmed about in her bassinet, and her sleepy, amethyst eyes blinked open before a soft mewling escaped her lips, steadily increasing in volume until she was flat out wailing. Ed sat stock still; gazing at her, biting his lip; looking just as guilty as he felt.

But before he could reach out for her, Hohenheim did; gently lifting her so that she rested in the crook of his arm, held close to his chest, shushing her tenderly. Ed's eyes were glued to his father, searching for some fault in Hohenheim's cradling that he could reprimand his father with; however, after a thorough examination, he found none.

Mere minutes later, Edward watched, amazed, as Hohenheim father gently replaced Serenity in her bassinet-- once again fast asleep.

"…Whose eyes does she have?" Hohenheim asked softly, stealing a glance at the younger alchemist to see what effect his question would have. Edward didn't reply, choosing to gaze out the window moodily instead. Hohenheim waited a minute longer for a response before he gave up; letting his eyes wander about until his gaze followed Edward's; and they were both looking out into the tranquil morning.

The two sat just like that for a while longer, before the (somewhat tense) silence was interrupted with a long, weary sigh coming from Hohenheim before the older man got to his feet.

Edward watched from the corner of his eye as his father got to his feet.

"Where d'ya think _you're_ goin'?" Ed asked half-heartedly; sounding as though he were trying to sound irritated, but too tired to really put anything into it. Hohenheim smiled slightly.

"To be honest, I'd best be leaving; I wouldn't want my presence to cause any more disturbances than it already has."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa—hang on a sec; you're _leaving_ again? Just like _that?!_" Ed gawked, staring at his father incredulously. Hohenheim's eyes saddened.

"I don't belong here anymore, Edward… I never did."

And with that, the elderly alchemist gracefully made his way to the bedroom door.

"Hey!"

Hohenheim paused, glancing back over his shoulder to his glowering son.

"Yes, Edward?" he asked patiently, turning back around to face the bedridden-alchemist. Ed seemed to struggle with himself for a moment before he broke eye contact with his father; letting his gaze drop into his lap as he seemed to grudgingly make a decision.

"Thanks."

The simple, statement was nearly inaudible; nevertheless Hohenheim caught it, and a smile lit up his features.

Ed's eyes widened slightly when he felt his father ruffle his hair affectionately; his eyes narrowed, and his head snapped up, ready to reply with a reproachful remark. The comment caught in his throat, however, when he realized that Hohenheim was already out the door; he only just managed to glimpse his father's back slipping out of sight.

He only tore his gaze away from the doorway when he heard a sleepy gurgle by his bedside. He turned to gently lift Serenity from her bassinette, smiling warmly at his daughter when her eyes blinked up at him curiously.

"Don't let 'em fool you; he's a _bona fide_ jerk," Ed assured Serenity as he held her against himself in a loving embrace.

XxXxXxXxXx

"…can call me anytime if you have any questions over the next few days or if anything seems out of place, annnd… that should be about it," Brian declared at last, clicking his suitcase closed in finality and turning to smile at the new parents.

"Thanks for everything, Brian," Edward said gratefully; glancing up at his lover questioningly when Envy chuckled.

"You've thanked him fifteen times already, Ed," Envy grinned; enjoying his chibi's flush of embarrassment.

"And again-- it was nothing, Edward; just promise me you'll take it easy," Brian laughed.

Ed made a small noise of acknowledgement; too distracted as he smiled down at the giggling infant in his arms. With a smile, Brian lifted his suitcase; smiling at the three permanent members of the household before he walked out the door; quickly making his way down the worn path.

Envy nudged Edward in the side; Ed tilted his head back against the Sin's shoulder to look up at him inquisitively.

"Ne, Edo, it's time to go," he murmured; nuzzling his face into the crook of Edward's neck.

"Okay," Ed replied, removing Envy's arm wrapped possessively around his waist and depositing the baby into the shape-shifter's arms instead before he slowly made his way to the table where his brother was sitting with Winry. Alphonse beamed up at his brother and stood up (but not without, Ed noted with a slight smirk, reluctantly letting go of Winry's hand).

"Promise you'll visit again soon, Nii-san," Alphonse pleaded, wrapping his arms around Edward in a warm hug.

"No worries, Al; I promise," Ed replied, flashing him a characteristic grin. The very moment he stepped away from the brunette, Edward found himself being embraced by his tearful, blue-eyed mechanic.

"You'd _better _visit more often-- and not just for automail repairs anymore, 'kay?" she sniffled, pulling back to look her childhood friend square in the eye.

"Aw; and I thought I'd get away with it, too," Ed retorted sarcastically, rolling his eyes up to the ceiling-- but Winry didn't miss the smile on his lips as he turned away.

"Thanks for letting us stay, Auntie," Edward grinned.

"It was nothing, pipsqueak—on the contrary, you boys should stay here more often," Pinako countered pointedly. Ed twitched, but didn't reply; merely crossing his arms and stomping back over to Envy, mumbling something about micro-mini grannies under his breath that, thankfully, the old woman seemed to miss.

"You ready to go, Chibi?" Envy asked; handing Serenity back to Ed before lifting the blonde alchemist's battered suitcase. Edward looked up at him before nodding affirmatively, allowing the Homunculus to slip a supporting arm around his waist and guide them to the front door.

"Goodbye, Nii-san! Bye Envy!" Al called, waving happily after the two figures' backs. Edward casually waved over his shoulder in response just before the two disappeared from sight over the next hill.

Alphonse slowly lowered his hand wearing a mixed expression; he was sad to see the two leaving, but happy, too. He was an uncle now-- he had a beautiful niece!

The young Elric gave a slight start when he felt a hand come to rest on his shoulder. He turned his head slightly to see Winry looking up at him questioningly.

"D'ya think we'll actually hear from them again soon?" she asked suspiciously. Al thought for a moment before grinning.

"Yeah… I think we will. They'll need all the help they can get, now that they've got Serenity," he replied easily.

A soft gasp caught in his throat when he felt two arms slip around his waist, and he glanced back to see none other than Winry smiling at him sweetly.

"So… what was that bet we made around five months ago?" she asked coyly. Al felt his heart race as he realized what she was getting at.

"What; that one about whether the baby would be a girl or a boy?" he asked nonchalantly; raising an eyebrow in amusement at the slight blush tinting the mechanic's cheeks a becoming pink.

"What else, silly?" she murmured, lightly running her fingertips down the sides of Al's arms.

"Well, I suppose you've won, then; haven't you?" Al whispered.

"Yeah, I guess I have… and I think I'll claim my prize right now," Winry declared, smiling fondly at him.

Gliding around from behind him so that she stood in front of him, she hesitated for only a brief moment before reaching up on her toes to place a chaste kiss on his lips.

The two stood there, blushing, until Al slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her close against himself and claiming her lips again; this time their kiss was less innocent as both put more vigor into it. When they broke apart they were grinning, and there was a comfortable silence as they gazed off into the sunny afternoon outdoors. Until--

"_Ahem._ I _–do– _believe there was a _second_ condition to our deal, Alphonse," Winry began slyly, glancing up at the brunette with a slight smirk. Alphonse stared back for a full minute before playfully rolling his eyes and shrugging.

"I was kind of hoping you'd forget…" he said, grinning down sheepishly at the giggling blonde.

"I suppose fair _is _fair… and as _much _as it pains me to degrade myself in such a manner—girls are the_ b_est," he replied—feigning a dramatic sigh. Winry grinned triumphantly before a thoughtful expression overtook her victorious one.

"Well… I guess a boy wouldhave been nice, too."

"No way! You said so youself _hundreds _of times-- girls are the best!" Alphonse shot back, staring at her in disbelief. Winry pulled away from him to strike a threatening stance; placing her hands on her hips.

"Well maybe I changed my mind!" she replied dangerously.

A pause; and then--

"Boys--!"

"--Girls!"

_.:**Owari**:._

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Jessie: So that's it!

Joh: Aww, you're finally done, Nee-san! **Tears **I'm so proud of you!

Jessie: _I got Hoho-Papa in there! _ _And _I finally managedtoget some AlxWinry fluff in there! **Obsesses** Squeeeee!

Joh: **Backs away** Riiiiight… 'kay people, just review.

Jessie: **Pouts** That's not a very nice way of asking.

Joh: Pshh, alright fine—_please _review.

Jessie: **Smiles **Much better.

**Note: **Don't forget to tell me if you believe a **sequel** is in order when you **review**!

**_A HUGE thank you to everyone who reviewed:_**

dream-whizper, xXxchiixXx, MiStraLL, Kaoru Gal, Me And My God Complex, razatip, Firelover666, Kiraz, SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll, kakashisninjadogs, Sashimi Mamimi, DemonSlayer93, Suicide-n-Murder, Ghosthly-Shadow, Master Fifer, chissprincess, aruslym, shu-chan77901, Solo Maxwell-Yamato, HolyMistress, Caim soul eater, Icyblackflame, Zaidee, Light-Hideko, Forever Yours Zana, Shifting Minds, Ally Inu, Firehedgehog, Mikaxx, I-Be-Deidei-un, Tacky-shoes, Liaiw, blackhearteddistruction, envy's flame, ArtemisRoseShadow, I-Be-Deidei-un, hanimeangel, Kiraz, NaitoKitsune, Rivalovery, Shakespeare'sWorstNightmare, darkangel36, Chibi-chibi-kun, SoulfulZen, FISHTaNK the Evil UglyDoll, loathed wolf spirit, IceyKota, Illusionwolf, angel61991, Ren Eats Babies, Otaku no Kochou, kousagibriefs, 7sins7lies, DragonBlade65, EnvyGreedEdFreak1993, Silverz, Sunako Kanzaki, Larentia Ariadne, sashsa, Strlight99, Blackfire Dog, ShimoAneue, Enviouse-Of-You-Kid, Kuroi Kitty, KnighthunterDark, NightPredator, telynaayuri, yaoi chicka, 7deadlysins-envy7, MaiKujakufan, siverrain, DarkNinjaBunneh, Lady Phoenix Slytherin, cuylerjade, An Angel Flying with broken wings, hyperdude, Hachikara-chan, frogger666, IshizuWolfRider, ryougabriellucile, RandomlyYours, Jedi Mistress 1990, Genki-angel-chan, Alchemist of the Flame, Zoorzh, Mana-san, Kaori Shie, sprinkle-chan, Pyralis Ambika, TOOL.2, MysticMaiden 18, tristana, imhappynessinabottle, Seto's Darkness, ThePinkAlchemist, chinsui-hime, Mistress of the Night5, Carrot The LuvMachine, Nessee, DeityOfDeath, Dark Angel Maybe, Mai-Kun, wolf-deamon333, ValentineMassacre, ED'sGirl 4ever, Yaoi Addicted Girls, FaeryDOLL, twisted-language, lilomissy021, NeptuneIce, jazzylin-sama, Shancho, Shininghope of RiverClan, YaoiShadow666-13, nekoluver, envyXedward, Shadow Vampiress, AAJ Edward, Chibi Tsuki Hikari.

**Stares **Wow… there were a lot more usernames than I remember ever reading… **Laughs **Thank you all _sooo _much!!

_**REVIEW PLEASE**_


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